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Iheartcupcakes

Moderator
  • Content Count

    7,618
  • Joined

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About Iheartcupcakes

  • Rank
    One Tough Cupcake - She/Her

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Texas
  • Interests
    baking (hence my username :), Spanish, social justice, singing, dog rescue.

Previous Fields

  • MembershipType
    Survivor

Recent Profile Visitors

73,268 profile views
  1. Oooooh! Interesting! Thank you for sharing!!
  2. Welcome! I speak only English and Spanish so I can't demonstrate like our friend @WannaMoveOn I hope you find our community beneficial and supportive.
  3. Six years ago tonight and tomorrow. Six years. I cannot believe what I lived  through. Last night was rough and tonight will be even worse. I can’t believe what happened to me…

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. Whisper

      Whisper

      Thinking of you and sending you hugs. I can't believe what you went through either and traumaversaries suck, but you survived, you put your rapist in prison and gave an eloquent and awesome victim impact statement, you are healing, and you are doing so much to help others. Not to mention how incredibly focused you were not only on doing what you had to do to survive that night, but also on ensuring that your rapist would be caught. You are an amazing and incredibly strong woman and that hasn't changed. :hug:  :throb: 

    3. snmls

      snmls

      :throb::throb: It is also six years of survival, resilience, strength, bravery, and advocacy. I wish I could change each and everyone one of our pasts, but I'm so glad you are here. 

    4. waterlily13

      waterlily13

      I am late, but sitting with you if you need ❤️ You are so very strong and you inspire me every day ❤️ 

  4. The more I see you post the more I'm reminded of Chanel Miller and want you to meet her. :) Her memoir has been a major source of healing for me, as has been this community. The publicity and news articles make it feel so emotionless and impersonal. I couldn't pay attention to the news articles, especially since her assailant is from my hometown (technically, I've lived here ten years which is the longest I've lived in one state).

    1. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @wolfennights That is quite a compliment. Thank you so much. I want to read her memoir when I can. 

  5. It's a little ridiculous that I have a broken heart (relationship wasn't that long) but I do. Riding the wave, as my T puts it. It sucks. 💔

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Mimi M.

      Mimi M.

      Awww, Im so sorry (hugs if comfortable). Been through that a couple times. In my case, the rejection hurt so bad, and just when I was staring to like them too 😥 So heart breaking.

      Sounds like your heart is pure and unlocked; able to allow the possibility of letting love in. Hang in there precious one. Sitting with you.

      -Mimi

    3. Field8

      Field8

      Not at all!!!! You feel how you feel. Sitting with you.

    4. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @Whisper Thank you. It did move fast. At first I was cautious and resistant. He somehow won me over. I haven't felt what I felt for him in a very long time, if ever. My boss said he knows why M moved so fast...he knew what a good thing he had. I guess not though...bc he threw me away pretty easily. 

      @mini.finch @MeBeMary @orangegiraffe thank you friends :hug:

      @Mimi M. I will. Thank you for the kind words. They helped. 

      @Field8 Thank you :throb:

  6. Hi@Iheartcupcakes, I talked with @feralcat and she suggested I asked you for the link to the poem you wrote called mosaic.  I think of my life as shattered mosaic.  Could you send me the link?  Thank you

  7. Things improve and there is a glimmer of hope and then BAM. The rug is yanked out from under me. I don't know if I have the energy to get up anymore. My SO's trauma plus mine (traumaversarys are next month for me) is overwhelming. And...it's mostly his. I am dealing really well with mine. Probably because I don't have any energy left to give to it....Hurting. Confused. Struggling. TIRED. 

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. waterlily13

      waterlily13

      Sending lots of comfort💙that sounds exhausting😢

    3. 8888

      8888

      Sending support.  :hug:if okay.

    4. Iheartcupcakes
  8. Really struggling right now. In a lot of pain. Can't seem to comfort myself. It's not my trauma but how my SO's is affecting me. Could use all the support. 

    1. Show previous comments  7 more
    2. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @WannaMoveOn @Capulet @mini.finch @Field8 @AKB @MeBeMary @matts thank you all so much. I had a rough weekend, with missing him since I was supposed to be on my trip to visit him, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. He is really trying to be more present and be mindful of the way he is affecting me, and I appreciate it. But, I just want HIM to be okay. The traumaversary is Monday for him. 

    3. waterlily13

      waterlily13

      Sending you lots of love @Iheartcupcakes, that sounds so hard, hoping you are finding some comfort❤️

    4. Iheartcupcakes
  9. The appeal should be decided on Wednesday although that date is not firm. Fall is already hard for me. I am really feeling the depression. I am so happy with my partner, and I am going to see him soon. It's just hard to shake all of this. People tell me to focus on the future and not look back, but they have no idea how hard that is when the past keeps intruding and you have no control...be it the court system or with PTSD and depression....

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Capulet

      Capulet

      ❤️ 
      @Iheartcupcakes - I get it, it’s hard to focus on your future when your past is still a large part of it.  Whenever something new pops up, we cannot help but drag the past along with us because it’s always going to be present.  I am so glad your new beau is someone who will be glad to help you carry it.  I’m sorry the courts are dragging things out and giving you more to worry about; especially now.  I am always here if you need to vent. 💕  

    3. Field8

      Field8

      I’m so sorry. Sitting with you always.

    4. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      Thank you @MeBeMary and @Capulet for understanding so well. I would love nothing more than for this not to continue to affect me but that is just not realistic. Thankfully my partner has his own trauma and understands this. 

      Thank you so much @Field8 :throb:

  10. Loving our community. I am so glad to be a part of such an amazing group of people. We don't celebrate the reasons, but I do celebrate YOU. Love to you all :throb:

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. 8888

      8888

      Agreed!  💗

    3. orangegiraffe
    4. Angel_12

      Angel_12

      I agree! This is an awesome community filled with amazing people like you! ❤️

  11. So defeated. Just so much going on. It seems like there are issues in every area of my life. Feeling hopeless, unlovable, and not worth it. Don't know where to go from here. What is the point of continuing to work? For what? What kind of a future can I have? I feel like things keep not working out in all areas and it's just what is going to keep happening. I am so tired. I had a hard time sleeping last night and cried a lot. This morning I just want to sit at my desk and cry and wish I was home in bed. First off my boss started in on me assuming a big error that was made was mine (it was not) without even asking me about it first. Now I am trying not to take all of my pain out on my coworkers....Friday cannot come soon enough. I just want to hide away in my house this weekend. 

    1. Show previous comments  12 more
    2. Whisper
    3. waterlily13

      waterlily13

      Sending you lots of love, I hope you are feeling even a little better tonight, you are an amazing person and I know things will get better💙sitting with you as long as you need💙

    4. Iheartcupcakes
  12. My five-year AS-aversary was in March. I am so thankful that I found this community. I love you all so much! - Amy :throb:

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. mini.finch

      mini.finch

      Happy AS-versary!! :hug:

    3. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @Poppy_ thank you so much! I am thankful to know you too :throb: Lots of love back!

      @waterlily13 awww it makes me so happy to hear that. Thank you so much. I am blessed to know you as well!

      @Whisper it feels like forever, doesn't it?? ❤️

      @MeBeMary Yes! That is a great way of looking at it. I am grateful for your friendship!

      @mini.finch thank you!

      @snmls :throb:

    4. Angel_12

      Angel_12

      Happy AS-versary! Thank you for all you do for this community. You are an inspiration.

  13. Still waiting on appeal to be heard by the state Supreme Court. Could take months.....

    :hammer::ranting::protest:

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. Mave

      Mave

      You’re welcome. You’re not alone. 💛

    3. goldraindrops

      goldraindrops

      I can't wait for all this to be over for you.  ❤️

    4. Whisper
  14. So sorry it's this season for you, Poppy. I know how hard it is. Your feelings are valid, but I happen to know that you are NOT worthless. I wish I could lift this pain from you. Know that your AS family is here with you in it. Amy
  15. MYYYYYYYYY FRIEEEEEENNNNNNDDDDDDDD IS BAAAAAAACK!!!!!!
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