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About Iheartcupcakes

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    One Tough Cupcake
  • Birthday March 4

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  • Interests
    baking (hence my username :), Spanish, social justice, singing, dog rescue.

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  1. 5 Words To Your Perpetrator

    I posted here way back when. Five new words... How is prison treating you? Is it worth it now? You awoke a sleeping dragon. You really f**ked up, Monster. I am stronger than you.
  2. No SSL cert on this Forum?

  3. "God don't like ugly!"

    I feel really badly for your sister. I've been there, just not with children. IMO she is better off without him, but like you said before, that's between the two of them. YES! They are not and he doesn't deserve that benefit.
  4. "God don't like ugly!"

    I will never understand people like that, friend. The other woman is the skank but not him? If he gets away from her he will find another. We all know that. Cheating is something inside the cheater and it has nothing to do with not being around one woman. If he wants to cheat, he will whenever, wherever. I am so sorry you have to put up with that. I am glad you stand your ground and protect yourself with that boundary. He doesn't deserve you or your peace.
  5. Hello Again

    Hey, Love! AS is lucky to have you.
  6. Getting ready for SAAM 2019! Teal nails done with the powder I collaborated on with a creator/business owner. It’s so special to me. #tealismypowercolor 



    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Whisper


      The necklace itself is nice. There is just something about the image of a chain around your hand and fingers in the context of SA that hits me wrong. Your nails say empowerment, but the chain makes me think of the opposite. No worries though because your nails are awesome and it's just a photo -- when you wear your necklace it is totally different. Also, it seems that nobody else is reacting to it as I did. Seems my brain often thinks the opposite of how everyone else's does.

    3. Iheartcupcakes


      I understand, @Whisper. I can see what you are saying. I am wearing it today so it looks better :throb:

    4. Whisper
  7. Making my father's cremation and burial at sea plans the last couple of days has been beyond hard. I wanted to help and asked to take this burden from my aunt. My father and other family lives in California and I am in Texas. I can't do much and I hate it. This aunt is his caregiver because of that. It was worse than I thought it would be. I have just been nauseated and sad. I know it's not SA-related although my father was abusive in every other way in my childhood. But I have tried to have a relationship in latter years and I do love him. It's bleeding into everything else. I feel like 36 is too young to lose a parent...and it hurts so much. 

    1. Show previous comments  13 more
    2. Whisper


      I'm sorry you are hurting, Amy. Sitting with you. :comfort:

    3. Silentnomore5


      Hugs  if ok we are all here for u always

    4. Iheartcupcakes


      Thank you both :throb:

  8. "Demons"

    I am so sorry. I am happy that you blocked him so that it won't happen again. I can't believe your brother has not done the same. I know that hurts you. He isn't happy...I promise you that. Reading your description of his life tells me that.
  9. I’m sorry for being MIA lately. With the anniversary dates, falling on thanksgiving day no less, and the appeal possibly expiring or moving forward at the same time, I haven’t been much good to anyone, even myself. I just want you all to know how special you are to me and that I’m comitted and grateful for AS. 

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. MzKeys75


      Glad you’re feeling better. (((Hugs)))

    3. Iheartcupcakes
    4. lexip


      You have so much going on take care of yourself right now ❤️

  10. Appeal deadline is supposedly the 17th, which is a weekend so I guess it is the 19th. Five more days. Nothing has been done in a year. A year ago today, the court reporter finished compiling the transcript for the defense. They picked it up on 12/6/17 and that was it. I am afraid they will blindside me again like they did continually during the course of the hearings and fight to get to trial. I hope and pray it comes and goes without incident and that this will be truly over. I am going to email the prosecutor on 11/19 and ask if it is over. 

    1. Show previous comments  10 more
    2. HiddenHeart


      Thinking of you tonight & hoping yesterday passed without anything being filed. 

    3. Hoping8


      Echoing @HiddenHeart.  I am thinking of you.

    4. Whisper


      Still thinking of you through your anniversary days. Sending strength.

  11. Too much pain. Too much sadness. Too much heartbreak. Too much everything. 

    1. Show previous comments  8 more
    2. Hoping8


      I am so sorry.  I will hold some of it with you.  I wish I could do more, but I am sending you love and peace, and feeling some of the sorrow with you.  There there, there there....

    3. Iheartcupcakes


      Thank you :throb: I have a new foster dog and has added some love and sunshine. I am just exhausted. 

    4. Ian37


      Amy, just remember that exhaustion means you are still moving. Even when it may not always seem this way. Nor be nearly quick enough.


  12. I want to die

    I am so sorry you are feeling this way. May I ask if you are on medication? I say this because I was there and my doctor changed my meds and I am feeling better now. I wonder if you could get some relief that way. I also don't know how you feel about therapy, but it has been a lifesaver for me. I go weekly. Please don't ever be afraid to reach out for help when you need it. 1-800-656-4673 is for RAINN, and there is 1-800-273-8255 to talk to someone when you are feeling suicidal. These are available 24/7. We are here, too.
  13. Has anyone ever tried Pristiq for the treatment of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD)?

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. BraveOne


      @Iheartcupcakes... I was on wellbutrin for about 2 weeks had a major issue in which I became super paranoid over everything... The dr took me off of it and told me never to try it again.

    3. Whisper


      I don't have any experience with Pristiq, but I'm sitting with you. You've come a long way in the last 3 years and have so many great things ahead of you. :console:

    4. Iheartcupcakes


      Thank you all. I’m feeling better. 

      @Whisper thank you so much. I needed to hear that. 

  14. Kavanaugh this, Kavanaugh that. I am so tired. I feel horrible, just like I did when Trump was elected. This has really, really affected me, like it has a lot of survivors. I wasn't really expecting that. People around me support him. I think some are so blind to politics that they can't even consider that Dr. Ford is telling the truth. I am frustrated, sad, nauseated, discouraged, angry, and isolated. I was in the grocery store after work yesterday and I felt myself losing control over the littlest things. I went home and tried to do some self-care. I am trying to stay away from it today but that is not easy. 

    1. Show previous comments  9 more
    2. Iheartcupcakes


      @Whisper thank you so much for those encouraging words. I really needed them. I know it hits home for you, too :throb:

    3. Whisper


      The part that I am having the most trouble with is all the girls at the schools where Ford lived who didn't talk to each other. Although I wondered whether my attacker went on to abuse others, I somehow never imagined that he abused other girls at my HS or that other girls had similar experiences there. Now I wonder how many girls I knew were also assaulted. With everything I know about SA, I still always imagine that it was only me.

      Also, my attacker became a lawyer (not criminal law -- thank God he didn't become a criminal defense attorney) and had his own law firm. But his firm has disappeared and he didn't register and pay his registration fee to the state bar when it was last due. The address listed in his attorney registration record isn't where his firm was -- it's an apartment that used to be listed in his mother's name, but maybe a couple of years ago, I saw that the apartment was sold. He has stayed clear of social media and there is very little trace of him on the internet. So now I'm wondering whether he's in some kind of trouble. I am upset enough that he became a lawyer. I can't imagine how I would cope with him being a judge and, especially, a Supreme Court Justice. 

      I don't know whether Kavanaugh is going to be confirmed -- I was pretty confident that he wouldn't be when I thought the FBI was doing a full investigation. Now that it appears the investigation was a sham, I'm not sure what is going to happen.  However, Sen Merkley filed a lawsuit to compel the WH to produce all of the docs they are hiding and made a motion for temporary restraining order to stop the vote while the case is pending. I think it is unlikely that he will win the case, but it's the same DC judge that had Manafort's case and I'm hoping she'll grant the TRO. Even delaying could help. Regardless, Kavanaugh is very dirty and I believe that, if he is confirmed, then after Mueller really acts and the truth about Trump et al comes out in full force, he will be impeached or he will resign (after being indicted).

      I know this is hard -- it's like we're being punched in the face and spit on repeatedly every day --  but hang on because we're not at the end yet. I just hope, hope, hope that women are going to vote this time and get rid of a lot of Republicans. They aren't a political party anymore, they are a bunch of criminals (the people in office, not the people voting for them). The Dems need to be cleaned up too, but first we have to get the Reps out of power. 

      When you have time, take a break from the depressing news and read these articles suggesting that women are going to vote and change things:  https://www.npr.org/2018/09/24/650447848/the-womens-wave-backlash-to-trump-persists-reshaping-politics-in-2018 and https://www.thecut.com/2018/09/rebecca-traister-good-and-mad-book-excerpt.html


    4. Whisper


      Update: I'm reading that McConnell doesn't have the votes. :crossfingers::crossfingers::crossfingers:  Ben Sasse gave a speech in which he said that he told Trump to pick a woman instead of Kavanaugh (a woman who wants to overturn R v W, but not a criminal who would protect him), partly because they were not equipped to deal with SA allegations that might surface. He has friends who were raped and understands the hell this causes. But OMG, is he admitting that they knew about Kav's past in advance? I know they did, but he's admitting it???? Anyway, he says things and then votes as he's supposed to, so I don't trust him to vote no. But maybe a group of Senators are going to tell McConnell that they will vote no, so he won't take a vote. https://www.omaha.com/news/politics/in-emotional-speech-ben-sasse-says-he-told-trump-to/article_537dc762-1cb2-5378-9cd5-b0507e0b1cf2.html

  15. I should probably take a break from Facebook. If I don't, I may need bail money. 


    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Free2Fly


      @Iheartcupcakes, Facebook literally causes nothing but trouble, was probably the worst thing to ever exist on the internet too.

      safe hugs :hug: if ok?

    3. Iheartcupcakes
    4. Free2Fly


      Yw safe hugs :hug:if ok?