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About feralcat

  • Birthday February 21

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    East coast USA

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  1. Hi Hoping8, How was last night for you? I'm hoping you got at least a little sleep. I know it's really difficult to fall asleep when the anxiety is running high... It's also tough to function when you're sleep-deprived... Just wanted you to know I'm still thinking of you and sending you fierce-grace energy :) And also, when you get a chance, try sending me a PM again. I did receive 2 other messages within the past couple days from other people, so if you can't send one then I should probably let someone know so they can fix it.... I hope today is good for you. Take care.


    1. Hoping8


      Seems like a Hs time it let the PM go through!

  2. Hi Fieldy :)

    Just checking in, I was thinking about you and wanted to say hello. How are you doing? Do you have any pets you can snuggle with at night before trying to go to sleep? I'm going to try it with one of my feral cats, Rachel, who has just started showing interest in being petted. She's sweet, elderly. I took her in years ago when I saw her outside and realized she was almost completely blind. She's a trooper. Gets around very well. We'll see how it goes. Take care.


    1. Field8


      Thank you Feralcat :)  I'm having a really hard time lately. Without much sleep everything is 10x worse. I have a fishy named Oscar. I hope that Rachel gives you some good snuggles.Talk to you soon.

  3. Hi Vitamin, just checking in... Wondering if you were able to sleep ok. I hope the after-EMDR nightmares end soon... You are so brave 🙂 I'm usually around if you ever want to talk. Take care.


    1. vitamin


      Hey @feralcat

       thanks for checking in, I really appreciate it! The post-EMDR nightmares did die down but then I had another session today so have it all to look forward to again! I’m here if you want to talk too, I have family visiting this week so won’t be around as much but will check in most evenings.


  4. Hi Vitamin. I just tried to send you a private message just saying Hello and it somehow seemed to end up in "status update"??? Sorry I screwed up, hoping you can fix it!

    1. vitamin


      Haha don’t worry 😂 it’s a minefield trying to get around the site sometimes! 

  5. Hi Vitamin,

    Just thinking about you and wondering how you're doing... Hope you're having good dreams..... 🙂


    P.S. How's my buddy Hank?

    1. vitamin


      Hey feralcat,

      thanks for your message! I had a pretty hardcore EMDR session today so I’m still reeling from that. Other than that I’m ok, how are you doing? Hank sends his love! He’s gorgeous as always and helping me this evening by being extra cuddly! 


  6. Hi denial, if you don't mind me asking, how did you put your artwork on for your profile picture. So cool. I'm a bit computer illiterate, so please describe it in detail like you're talking to a 7 year old 🙂(although most 7 year olds probably have good computer skills!)



    1. DenialsNotARiver


      Ok you want the Eli5 version (explain like I'm 5)...there are 2 picture slots when you edit your profile.  One is for your profile pic (the circle u see when people post), and one if for the header of your profile (usually seen when viewing a profile). The circle one has to be small so I cut down the zone of the image and uploaded it.  And the other I just uploaded (much like when adding an image to a post). Let me know if you need me to give a more detailed version than that.  If so we might wanna try through chat windows when online together and go step by step.

    2. feralcat
  7. Just wondering how you're doing denial... And saw your bday was last week so I wanted to wish you a very happy belated birthday! I hope you had a happy day and I hope this year is filled with good things for you. Take care


  8. Hi amallison0084, I'm sorry you're in pain, grieving, and feel so alone. Im going to encourage you to write on the forums like Gathering place, where more people will hear your thoughts and feelings and be able to respond and offer you support. Folks at AS understand how overwhelming flashbacks and depression can be. I'm pretty new so I'm not sure what to say to help you, but I know that other people will be happy to jump in. Please reach out and ask for support. For now, know that you are not alone, and that you are a beautiful soul and worthy of love and happiness. Sending you peaceful healing light, feralcat
  9. feralcat

    I am...

    Wow aperson, that was great! feralcat
  10. feralcat

    The first step

    Hi dee86, I'm so sorry for your pain and despair. I think you did great, showering and eating and staying alive. I understand that struggle. There are days when breathing and staying on this planet are tremendous acts of bravery. I'm so glad you have people in your life who you love and who love you. Keep reaching out for help and support. Keep breathing. feralcat
  11. Hi @Lightbug Glad you found AS. I love lightbugs, here on East coast u.s. we call them Lightning bugs. When I was a kid I remember tons of lightning bugs out on summer nights, shining their tiny specks of light, made evenings so magical. Hope you find lots of support here to keep shining your light... feralcat
  12. feralcat


    Thank you all for your good thoughts and healing wishes. I wish them back to you and to everyone here and to the people who haven't found After Silence yet... I don't have much of a support network but I am fortunate to have an amazing friend who knows a little, she knows I experienced trauma but doesn't know any details. I also do have a wonderful caring therapist who has helped me thru years of relentless depression. I had told him I had experienced trauma but hadn't given any details until recently. It's so hard to talk about. Immediately after it happened i did talk about it with hospital staff and an advocate and way too many police, and then I was briefly in a rape survivors group... I think I convinced myself that that was enough and Poof! All healed... (I wish) I also confided a lot in my best friend at the time, who is now deceased. Part of me knows that I need to deal more with the trauma to be healthier and happier. It is a hellish rollercoaster when things get stirred up. But another part of me wants to keep this a secret, keep it contained, in a giant strong box with tons of locks on it. It is such a big horrible disgusting sadistic storm cloud. How can I let it out in the world? I really don't want it to touch anyone else's life, even secondhand or thirdhand. I feel like Pandora trying to keep evil stuffed in a box....
  13. feralcat


    Thank you all so much for your kind welcomes. I'm so relieved to have found a safe caring group where I can really deal with trauma.
  14. feralcat


    Thank you so much.
  15. feralcat


    Hi, I've just recently found After Silence, I wish I had found you folks years ago. You all have such courage and wisdom. I've kept my trauma and its dark aftermath pretty much to myself for so long I don't really even have words to talk about it. Just pain and alone-ness. I'm hoping if I can experience some understanding and support from other survivors I can make progress healing. And become part of a caring group and support other people on their healing journeys.
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