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MeBeMary

Newbie Support Team
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    Female
  • Location
    Michigan

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    Survivor

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  1. Hi Cristina, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the trauma you experienced just over 10 years ago and the recent issues with those posing as friends. Both of these individuals are far from being true friends and I know that can create such problems with trust and believing in others. I am sorry they betrayed your trust. You deserve much better. You will find support and understanding here. You are not alone. One of the most difficult things for a survivor to do is trust enough to start a relationship. You need to find trust with the other person and trust in yourself to move forward with a relationship. It is nice to hear that you have someone that seems supportive and nice. I would just suggest keep communication lines open and do not rush yourself. Take small steps and move at a rate that is comfortable to you. I am very happy you found our community and decided to reach out. I wish you the best as you move forward on the path of healing. Mary
  2. Hi Myra, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the trauma you have endured 15 years ago. Sometimes it takes awhile for us to seek help, but it is never to late. I can attest to that, as it took me over 30 years. You are not alone. I know the courage it takes to speak out those words, so I would like to acknowledge this bravery. You will find support and understanding here in our community, as you are fully accepted and validated. I find many survivors do have a creative outlet and if you ever feel like sharing some of your creative expression, please take a look at our Healing Thru Creativity forum. As with anything tho, do feel free to take your time looking over the site and interact when you feel comfortable. As the others have mentioned...beautiful dogs. I find animals can be a source of comfort, whether they are officially therapy trained or not. It is nice you have both and it crosses species, as well. I hope they give you great comfort. Again, I am glad you found our community and wish you well, as you move forward down your healing path. Mary
  3. Hi Time, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for what you have gone thru, but do know that you are supported and understood here. You are not alone. It's very difficult when struggles overtake you, but it helps when you have others who know what it's like. You are right, nobody deserves to hurt or be hurt. Others can be so selfish and cruel. We need to continue to fight and move forward down this path of healing. I wish you well on this journey. Mary
  4. Hi MSmith, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the trauma that you recently went thru. This was not fair nor right. I am glad that you are taking steps to take self-care, it is often one of the most difficult things for a survivor to do after the trauma. Let me assure you, you owe this guy nothing. In fact, if the unfortunate circumstance comes back that you have contracted a STD, it is likely he gave it to you. The only reason you should ever have to come in contact with him again is if you decide to report him to the authorities. Do know this is always your choice and you will not be judged here based on that choice. I am glad that you found our community. You will find much support and kindness. Do know you are not alone. Take your time and look around our site. Feel free to post or interact where and what you are comfortable with. I wish you many steps forward as you travel this path of healing. Mary
  5. Hello EvilRegal, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the reasons that bring you here, but glad you found us, just the same. You will find our community and supportive and caring one. You are not alone. Feel free to take your time and look around and jump in when you feel ready. This is a survivor's unite type forum, but I like to think of it a little bit as cat lover's unite forum, too. We do have many members who love animals, not just cats, but they are my favorite, as well. We do have a thread where members have shared pet photos with one another, if you would like to look or share. It is pinned at the top of the Simply Life forum (a private forum). Whenever I need a smile, I drop by. I am glad that you decided to join our community. I wish you many forward steps on this journey we call healing. Mary
  6. MeBeMary

    New

    Hi Pepper, We spoke earlier, but wanted to give you an official welcome, as well. I am sorry you have reasons for being here, but support and understanding is here for you. This is a wonderful community of members all working together to help and support each other as we deal with our struggles and try to move down this healing path we are all on. You definitely are not alone. Take your time looking around and be sure to let me know if you need anything. I am always here to assist. Until then, I wish you nothing but positive wishes and steps forward as you move forward. Mary
  7. Thought for the day. I am an animal lover and animals can teach us so much. Tho a lion can be a fierce creature, they also have a beauty. They can also tell us something about life and what we've been thru.

    So today, the thought of the day comes from the mighty lion. :throb: 

    jhhjhj.jpg

     

     

     

     

  8. Hi T, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the awful experiences you endured about 5 years ago. You did nothing wrong and it is unfair and wrong these things were done to you. You are not alone. Our community is filled with supportive, understanding and kind members. Many have shared similar experiences, and most have experienced similar struggles. To say what you go thru is sadly common is sadly true. You are not alone tho. I am sorry that your mother doesn't seem to be open. A mother's faith in their child should be first and foremost, but sometimes they too, are unopen to hear uncomfortable experiences and refuse to support. You should not need proof for your mother. Do know you saying so is proof enough here. From what you mentioned about your therapist, she doesn't seem like a trauma specialist. If so, perhaps her limited specialty is not adequate for proper healing support. There are many ways a true trauma specialist could suggest. Letting out anger is not a bad thing, just not enough when someone has taken your rights away and hurt you so deeply. If she is not a trauma specialist, perhaps it is something to think about? We here tho, will support and validate you as much as you need and more. I am glad that you have found our site and decided to join. It is a big step to reach out to others and I wish you many more steps forward on this path of healing. Mary
  9. Hi Unsure, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for what you went thru, but do know you have found a very understanding community. Our members are kind and understanding. You are not alone. You did nothing wrong and I'm angry a grown man would do this to you at 6. But there are grown men that sadly do this. Confronting an abuser is such an individual choice to make. Where it can give you a voice and say YOU WERE WRONG TO HURT ME, it can also create other issues. The world is getting a little better, but there is still a lot of catching up for it to do. You might be received with doubt or anger and in a good chance of denial from your perpetrator. If you feel in the right place to do this tho, you will have our support. I am glad you found our site and decided to reach out. You are not alone. Take your time to look around the site. Wishing you the best as you travel your path of healing. Mary
  10. Hi Kira, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry you are in a domestically violent relationship. I know it is very difficult to leave a relationship, especially with how long you've been in one. As 8888 said, perhaps there is options for you, if you look into it? You deserve to be safe and no worry for you or your son. Him being your husband does not give him the right to take away your right of consent. You are still a human being, tho I have great difficult in seeing him as one. There is something known as respect and honor in a relationship, and he has dismissed this, along with your consent. I am sorry you have reason to be here, but glad you have reached out. You will find support and understanding and encouragement. You are not alone. Take your time and look around the site. I wish you the very best as you journey down the path of healing. Mary
  11. Hello sunflowersforme, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the traumas you have endured and the struggles you have faced. It is never fair for anyone to hurt another like this and I do hope you know none of it is your fault. It is good that you have a good relationship with your therapist and she has helped you with some of your trauma, including this new one to pop up last year. It is very brave to sever ties and enforce strong boundaries. You are important and your healing process is important. I know it probably wasn't easy, but good for you for thinking of your mental health first. You will find a lot of support here by our understanding and kind members. You are not alone. Wishing you step after step forward as you move down your path of healing. Mary
  12. Hi LakeSunset, First, may I say that I love the user name you have chosen. It immediately made me think of a beautiful sunset on the lake. Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for the trauma you have experienced earlier in life and the realization of what it was and the struggles that come with that. I came this way a few years back, myself being 30+ years out. I denied the truth until the truth would not be denied anymore. Perhaps this is similar to how it came back to you? Healing, I have found, doesn't expire. It's not easy or fast, but it's never too late to start. I feel we may be the same generation, because I feel there was a lack of understanding back then. Many basic facts were overlooked, it is no wonder that I thought what happened was a mistake that I made and not an abuse situation. I do think society still has a long way to go, but yes...#metoo and social media, news media and the way the world connects now, there is a voice for those like us. I am very happy you found our community. Take your time and get comfortable and interact when you are ready. I wish you many steps forward on this journey we call healing. Mary
  13. Hi CAB1997, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry you have experienced trauma, but do know that you will find support, understanding and kindness within this community. It is a safe place where you can share when and what you like to, when you are comfortable. You are not alone. Both instances that you experienced were wrong, but I can understand how each may have a different impact and how you may struggle. There is no wrong way to feel about either. If you plan on confronting the abuser of this most impactful trauma you endured, just know it is seldom and rare for these jerks to admit their wrongs or feel sorry for it. If you confront him, know this. You will be doing it to give yourself a voice, which if you are ready for it, can be a healing step. Take your time and look around the site. There is no pressure, but I can guarantee you will have validation. I am glad you have found us and wish you the best on this journey of healing. Mary
  14. MeBeMary

    Hello

    Hi Calliope, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry you have experienced childhood trauma. It was undeserved and unfair. You have yet another safe place where you are supported by a community of wonderfully kind and understanding survivors. We do walk this path together and we are not alone. You will find the same kind of validation here, perhaps with a new adult perspective. Tho it may take to to process and heal fully, there is no reason to have to do it alone. Feel free to look around our site and jump in where you feel most comfortable and share as little or as much as you like. No pressure and never any judgment. Do your own pace. I am glad you decided to reach out. I wish you well as you move forward down this path of healing. Mary
  15. Hi Mango, Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry you experienced trauma last summer and any previous situations of abuse you endured. You are not alone. Your teacher recommended a very supportive and understanding community of survivors who will accept and validate your experiences. Nobody had the right to hurt you. It is incredibly brave to speak out, as I'm not sure if you are aware, it is a rare occurrence. As you likely know, it is very difficult to speak out, not knowing the reaction of others or if any re-victimization will happen. You've taken steps many of us haven't been able to...yet we do like to see justice, so I hope at the very least, he is removed from his position. I am glad you took your teacher's recommendation and joined our community. I wish you the best as you walk your path of healing. Mary BTW...the amount you shared is acceptable, as you seemed to stop where you thought was enough in a public forum, and I agree.
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