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behindthesehazeleyes

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  • Content Count

    216

  • Joined

  • Last visited

7 Followers

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    USA
  • Interests
    coffee. books. music. nature. God.

Previous Fields

  • MembershipType
    Survivor

Recent Profile Visitors

1,804 profile views
  1. behindthesehazeleyes started following Invisible1
  2. behindthesehazeleyes started following Installment Two: The Party
  3. behindthesehazeleyes
    *SH talk TW* I want you to know I’m not in the best of places but thank you for the TW. Something you said stuck with me…about how we remember just before vividly but during, not so much. I still remember before very vividly as well. It was in Oct. right when the seasons change here, and now every autumn since is tinged with those memories I have dulled trying to claw their way back. So right now I am having not the best time emotionally….well I never am but worse than usual. I will leave this a dog-eared page for now, thank you ahead of time for sharing. It’s the time of year that I
  4. mini.finch started following behindthesehazeleyes
  5. behindthesehazeleyes

    Hi. Saw that you’ve been feeling down and wanted you to know even though I’ve been MiA a while I can always sit with you or listen. Hugs if ok. 
    :hug:

    1. 8888

      8888

      Thank you!  :hug:

  6. behindthesehazeleyes
    Hiya. Welcome 🐇
  7. behindthesehazeleyes
    I have been talking to my long distance ex that is my BF again…but there’s this wall. Every time I want to knock it down…every time we talk about something sexual that makes me think back to what’s been done to me…thinking about it now makes me want to vomit… he said something the other day that we were talking about and it has had me triggered since. he helped a girl by giving her a ride home, that was drunk and alone left by her bf at his place of work, crying without a ride or phone in the parking lot. He’s a good guy and he gave her a ride home. But he half making a joke but also
  8. behindthesehazeleyes
    behindthesehazeleyes changed their profile photo
  9. behindthesehazeleyes

    Hi nice to meet you! Just saw your username and thought it is really cool...I love rain. Hope this finds you well :)

    B

  10. behindthesehazeleyes
    At a low point but first time at one of these points where I have a therapist I really like. I have “my body is a cage” stuck on repeat in my head atm. It’s sickeningly appropriate for how I feel. ***Trigger Warning**** Wanting to crash diet, count cals, keep food journal, look at certain things online. (if you know what I mean, you know..) wanting to feel anything but my feelings...so visualizing self harm a lot. It’s how I cope with not self harming...haven’t in 10+ yrs. my depression is just bad and I want to focus on anything but feelings...while also
  11. behindthesehazeleyes
    Oh wow you’re really talented that’s cool
  12. behindthesehazeleyes
    Welcome. You are among friends and great people. xx
  13. behindthesehazeleyes

    Read some of your blog 

    *sits with you* if that’s ok

    1. Celia

      Celia

      It's more than okay, I appreciate it. 🙏 And thank you for reading some of my blog 🥺:hug:

  14. behindthesehazeleyes
    I partially read but stopped..because it was hitting home. My dad. It’s a sore spot, lots of anger and resentment there for me. Also raised in a one horse town..once you’re pigeon holed, that’s it. It’s stupid small town drama. They have nothing better to do. Seriously sometimes tv dramas get the “local small town crazies” spot on. part of me is ready to start over in a new state, a new small town, a much nicer one, if those exist. They’ve got to right?
  15. behindthesehazeleyes

    I know you probably hate me but I want you to know that I hope you’re ok

  16. behindthesehazeleyes

    Hiya I just wanted you to know I haven’t forgotten you and that I’m thinking of you. Sorry I haven’t been the most supportive friend. Hope you’re doing ok, love. -L

    1. Enigma87

      Enigma87

      @behindthesehazeleyes Oh friend, please don’t worry! I’m not thinking badly about you at all. I’m so glad to hear from you! I’m hanging in there. I hope you are okay! Feel free to PM me if you want ❤️❤️❤️

  17. behindthesehazeleyes

    Hey there girl, I’m back online and wanted to say hi. I hope you’re doing well.

    1. Enigma87

      Enigma87

      Hey girl! @behindthesehazeleyes I’m so glad to hear from you ❤️ I’ve been okay. Hanging in there as best as I can. I’ll definitely PM you.

  18. behindthesehazeleyes
    Nice to meet you. Theres lots of great support here.
  19. behindthesehazeleyes
    Let me just say...that I also relate so much to this. I couldve been typing most of this myself. Though I won't always admit these things...many are true for me as well...idk why the self hate thing with not brushing teeth or any self care. It is ALWAYS a struggle for me.
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