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Iheartcupcakes

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Everything posted by Iheartcupcakes

  1. I am so happy you are okay, Poppy. You are so very precious. I hope it works out with this new T. I would have felt exactly how you felt about being dropped from your old one. But hopefully, K will be a better fit. ❤️
  2. Struggling hard. So sorry. I may continue to be scarce until after this weekend when the 5th anniversary is. Love you all so much. Truly. 

    1. Show previous comments  9 more
    2. Hoping8

      Hoping8

      Be scarce, or be plentiful. Whatever works for you at whatever moment you encounter. You have been on my mind. A lot.

    3. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      Sending you love and support as well :)

       

    4. goldraindrops

      goldraindrops

      I'm so sorry, Amy.  I know it's a rough time.  We're here for you.  :)

       

  3. Today is the day. The Supreme Court (of AR) gave The Monster's scumbag defense lawyers until today to file their writ of certiorari with them and you guessed it. There is NOTHING on the docket so far. They've had THREE YEARS to do this, and they can't even honor a two week-deadline given to them by a court that can sanction them, etc. They are unbelievable. If you have followed my story, you already know that. I just wonder how long this will be allowed to continue. I am tired. But, no one gives a you-know-what about me. Not the Court, not his lawyers, no one in the system. Victims don't get lawyers for themselves, and once a case has progressed to an appeal, the prosecutor is done. Once again, I am my own advocate. And, like I said, I am tired. 

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Whisper

      Whisper

      Sending you lots of love, hugs, and extra strength. I don't know what those morons are thinking. This is a hard time of year for you anyway and a horrible year for everyone, but remember that the monster is locked up and will not be able to spend the holidays with his family - nor will those wretched people be able to spend the holidays with him. :console:

    3. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      Thank you all so much. It turns out Walker filed something (not a writ of certiorari) on the 27th. Not sure what happens next. 

    4. abhaya

      abhaya

      Poop. I'm sorry this process is still continuing.  Sending you support and sitting with you in solidarity, if you would like.

  4. https://www.cleo.on.ca/en/publications/handbook
  5. Nothing is helping. I felt a bit better after writing yesterday and posting it here, but I am still in a pit. I am at work trying to avoid everyone so that I don't take it out on them. I left my anxiety meds at home...but what good would they do anyway? I feel more depressed than anxious. I wish I was home with my dogs. But even then, I am still suffering. I have no idea what to do. 

    1. Show previous comments  7 more
    2. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      My stylist knows what I have been through but I didn't really want to talk about it. I just told her I was struggling. It turned out okay. I just wasn't in the mood. 

      Thank you so much @Field8 and @MeBeMary :throb:

    3. lexip

      lexip

      @Iheartcupcakes sitting with you ❤️ 

    4. Iheartcupcakes
  6. You are always welcome here! Glad to "see" you back.
  7. Today I have court.

    This time I am not the victim, but I am speaking for him. I am fostering a dog who has been abused and starved. I am a witness in the case against his owners and hopefully we will convict them of neglect and the dog will not be returned to them. They are fighting to get him back. 

    It is bringing up a lot. I have not been in court since my trial, which was three years ago (April 2017). Could use sitters and prayers/good vibes that the innocent dog gets justice and will not be returned to his abusers. I think we can all identify with that....

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. BrightSide

      BrightSide

      Im sorry I am late for support, I hope that it went well yesterday 💛

    3. goldraindrops

      goldraindrops

      That's so very good of you. I didn't see this till now, but you are doing a wonderful thing.

      I've said many times, it's hard for me to fathom somebody who can abuse a dog.  They are such wonderful little creatures, because their love for us is so pure and total.  To betray that is a horrible violation.  

      Are you able to share how it went?

    4. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @MeBeMary @BrightSide @goldraindrops thank you so much. It did not go well and I am not okay, unfortunately. I posted about it in the Gathering Place. 

  8. I would definitely bring it up. That is very disturbing, especially for a child. I think you have every reason to feel how you do. My T once told me that parents watching porn in front of their kids, talking about inappropriate sexual things (not like informing), etc can be considered sexual abuse. I would say this falls into that.
  9. I’m thinking of you all in these crazy times. I love my AS family ❤️

    It’s April which means it’s not only the anniversary of the trial but Sexual Assault Awareness Month. I’m usually running myself ragged doing things, but with social distancing and quarantine, it has cut it way down. I feel like that’s good and bad. I’m tired, and I get a break, but I don’t want people to not be involved. I don’t want the level of awareness to suffer.

    April 27 marks the third year since the monster was convicted and put away for life. It’s triggering but it’s on the back burner right now. My dad is fading fast 💔

    for those of you who don’t know he has terminal cancer and he has fought an amazing battle. He is in the 1% of survivors living 22 months with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. That is unheard of. But his time is drawing near and he does not want me to travel to be with him. I don’t understand even though a lot of people are telling me they do. It doesn’t feel good, but I am respecting his wishes. It’s been pretty rough. 

    also, one of my huge triggers is masks, hoodies, and otherwise covered faces, and I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this. In this pandemic people are wearing masks. They’re everywhere. I’m trying to normalize it but I feel like I’m being unhealthy and just putting it out of my mind and not dealing with it. I think I have too much going on. 

    How are you all holding up? 
     

    Love to all of my AS fam. 

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Field8
    3. snmls

      snmls

      Sending you love :throb:

    4. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      Thank you so much @MeBeMary ❤️ Maybe that’s it. 
       

      thank you @Field8 and @snmls ❤️

  10. All...I am in the midst of working on a shutdown for my school district. Before that, I was sick myself and home for a solid week with a low grade fever and respiratory/flu symptoms. I am better now, but we have no idea what my illness was. I am NOT saying I had COVID-19, but I was sick with something. Not having a diagnosis was scary. I am so sorry I have not been as present as I would like to be lately. It's been one thing after another lately. I am still here for you. I love AS and each of you. I just wanted to let you know what is going on. I am an "essential" employee, so I cannot go home and simply self-quarantine like everyone else. I will still be working, but hopefully, reduced hours. I pray you are all well and healthy, and managing anxiety and stress during this time. Love to you all :throb:

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. MeBeMary
    3. goldraindrops

      goldraindrops

      Stay safe and healthy.  We all love and appreciate you.

    4. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      @AKB uhhhh those sound AH-mazing!!! 😍

      Thank you all so much. AS is so very important to me. 

  11. Hi Stormy, Welcome. I am sorry for what you have experienced. I hope you will find love and support here. Amy
  12. Hi Peachy, I am so sorry for what you have been through. You are welcome here
  13. Doing better with anxiety over my dad's terminal cancer. Going home to see him in 11 days. If you need me, I am here. You can always PM. I will always want to talk with you and support you. I love my AS family :throb:

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. MeBeMary

      MeBeMary

      We support you to, Amy. Big :hug:s to you. 

    3. waterlily13

      waterlily13

      Sending all the love and support your way:hug:if ok❤️

    4. MzKeys75

      MzKeys75

      I’m glad you are doing better with this. All the :throb:s!

  14. Welcome, and please don't worry about posting too much. Your post was not graphic at all. I am so very sorry that happened to you and his wife. I hope she will corroborate your experiences even if she does not press charges herself. I hope he is put in a cage where he belongs.
  15. Hola, amiga. Bienviendo a After Silence, pero lo siento mucho por las cosas que te pasaron. Tienes amigos aquí. Español no es mi idioma primera, así que perdonáme por cualquier error también. Amo el idioma y he disfrutado aprender a hablarlo.
  16. Thursday and Friday (the anniversary dates) are bearing down on me. My beloved little foster dog was adopted Sunday and although I have another, it always breaks my heart to let one go. I also got some news about my dad. He has terminal pancreatic cancer that spread to his lungs, which is the main issue. He has survived way longer than predicted, but now his lungs are giving out on him. He can barely breathe. Even with treatments, he says he feels like someone is standing on his chest. Work is overwhelming, holiday travel is too, and so much more. I am just feeling overwhelmed and EXHAUSTED. My body just flat wants to give up. I have no energy and I yawn all day and fight sleep. I just want to go to bed but I can't. I have deadlines to meet and no one else to do the work. Praying that the weekend comes soon and brings relief. Saturday I am going to the local shelter to take pictures of the dogs there for adoption to post and hopefully get them exposure so they will find homes. I know I will enjoy that. Thanksgiving week will be good, I hope. For the first time, the anniversaries are not near it, since Thanksgiving is later this year. I hope that means I can move on and feel better. 

    1. Show previous comments  9 more
    2. Moongoddess

      Moongoddess

      Sending hugs your way, friend. :hug:

    3. lexip

      lexip

      That is a lot to deal with, but your so strong,  I know you will get through it (((AMY)))

    4. Iheartcupcakes
  17. We will be having a post about it soon! Stay tuned You may be able to. Let us think on it.
  18. We met our October donation goal! Thank you so much to everyone :throb: It is now November, and I know we can do it again if we all band together and do what we can do. You are all amazing!

    1. Mave

      Mave

      Woop! 🙌 Awesome sauce!

  19. Hi everyone!

    We are a fourth of the way to our October donation goal. Maybe some of you have not donated because you don't use chat, and that's understandable. I myself didn't realize until recently that it went to more than the new chat platform.The donations fund the forum. No pressure, but if you can spare any, we would appreciate it! If you can, let's help defray expenses. Our monthly goal is only $200. You shouldn't have to donate much or often...we have thousands of members. Just wanted to put this back on the radar so we can meet our goals and provide this safe space for those who are hurting. Love to all!

    Amy

    1. Field8
    2. Poppy_

      Poppy_

      I donated! :clap:I will continue to give what I can every month :)  

    3. Iheartcupcakes

      Iheartcupcakes

      Thank you both! :throb: I hope many contribute a little. We surely don't want anyone to be burdened. 

  20. Iheartcupcakes

    Goodbyes

    (((((teleah))))) you are STILL a mom. No matter where your daughter goes, you are still her mother and you always will be. She will always need you The world will always need you...we need your love, your light, your courage, your strength, and your kindness. I am so very sorry your parents more than failed you. I am so sorry for the abuse you suffered.
  21. Oh it's sooooo good to "see" you!!!!!!!!! I hope you are doing well.
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