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AngelasAshes

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    56
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About AngelasAshes

  • Rank
    Warrior
  • Birthday April 21

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female

Previous Fields

  • MembershipType
    Survivor

Recent Profile Visitors

85 profile views
  1. @RisingStrong I totally get that. I think it might even be one in four. I tend to start counting the women in the room, or thinking that I might make the 1 in 4 for multiple groups. Somehow survivors are hit multiple times? This last instance would make my third instance as a survivor and Im also a secondary survivor to my daughters CSA. I want to know the statistics on that... Or if I just permanently have a bulls eye on my back. I want to do some shouting as well. I hope we find a way back to peace from this, together.
  2. Thank you @RisingStrong I'm sorry you know those feelings too It truly saddens me that there are so many people who experience these things.
  3. Thank you @Capulet for the welcome and kind words.
  4. @Poppy_ @missfrier @Mave @MeBeMary thank you for the welcomes and the support. They mean more than I can say right now.
  5. @8888 I saw that when I read all the bulletins before joining. I don't know if I can go there or not yet - even after the 10 posts. Its all so fresh and I think I will want to read other stories but only end up triggering myself. Its been 7 years since the CSA was discovered with my daughter, the court ruling and getting her safe. Its only been the last 2 years that I have been able to move forward with life without crippling PTSD and panic attacks.. She has CPTSD and has been hospitalized for depression. Shes tough though, we have been fighting to rise above this for years. Its like I finally found a way out of the darkness just for this new crisis to find me.
  6. Thank you @8888 I dont know if its just my area or if its everywhere but any place I call here has a waitlist. Some are 4-6 weeks. I have only told my spouse and my boss about what happened and it feels like its eating me alive. I just want to get it all out and find a way past it but I cant tell anyone I know.. I learned years ago when struggling through my daughters CSA that people will judge you, distance themselves from you and flat out deny things before accepting the truth - that there are monsters out there and they look just like everybody else. The few friends that survived that crisis with me cannot know this one. I just cant do that to them or lose them after coming through so much with them. Its nice to see a community of people that understand all of these feelings.
  7. Hello, new here. I've been reading posts as a guest for about a week. Glad I found this place, it's been very disheartening to find how long it takes to get help after trauma. I'm on two therapists wait lists currently. As a survivor previously, and the mother of a SA survivor - I never thought I'd be back in this place again in my life. I'm always so careful and guarded. I know ultimately the blame belongs to the criminal/monster but it's still fresh and I haven't moved past the "what ifs" yet. Thank you for the safe space to feel this and work through it. 💗
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