gorbaby

I feel like it didn't even happen. That it was my fault. I woke up in the middle of it and just did nothing.

I haven't been on here in a long time. I got a call from the D.A months ago. I haven't done anything with that. Ive reached out to his parents and one of his friends. I called him. I just want an apology.

I reported it and it's going to the D.A's office now! 

Too afraid to sleep tonight. 

I haven't been on in a while but I finally reported it to the police with my witness to a confession made and told the woman everything. She was so lovely, it made me feel better. But since then I've had nightmares and I have a flashback today when I was on auto pilot and almost got hit by a car. Glad I didn't. But they brought in my abuser for questioning today and if I end up winning the case I am debating suing him too for emotional damage. His family is no stranger to money so I don't mind the idea. 

Just one of those low points where I'm feeling upset. Maybe I'm just tired I don't really know what is wrong. Just something feels off and I can't put my finger on it. 

I just had a conversation with my guidance consular at school. I had let her know what happened to me. I had debated doing so with my family, we wanted to keep it more private but we figured it would help my case here at school. The assault made me miss a lot of school, I was very lethargic and upset. I never wanted to leave my room. But I've brightened up since then and pursued the idea of finishing out school. With help from my family encouraging me to stay in school and everything. But the stress has weakened my immune system, at least that is what my new boyfriend thinks. He's very health positive. But I have Vasovagal Syncope and it makes my heart rate go up and I faint a lot more. So I've been out of school more. But they just offered me a program to finish out my junior year. Basically I will do a few of my harder classes in a "home school setting" and just check in with my school every week and do a bunch of work from home and do my easier classes in a normal classroom setting. It really is going to make my life easier. And next year I'll be able to do all of my classes online from my laptop. I'm really grateful for the opportunity that my guidance consular has provided. I wanna do something nice for her.