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[Kenzi]

I don't even know how to begin. I'm trying to just live... But I still deal with so much guilt. 

I've edited this, so hopefully no one reads before I completed.

I've dealt with triggers lately and don't feel like I have many to talk to. So I decided to look into online support groups and found this one. I'm hopeful this will help my healing. I have told people in my life about what happened. Some know everything and some know an edited version. But I currently don't have the same people I did when my SA happened. So I need to find help and somewhere to talk more freely about my past abuse.

 

Edited April 7, 2019 by Kenzi

[goldraindrops]

Dear @Kenzi,

I am so sorry for the suffering you've endured.  It was brave of you to reach out to us.  

This is a site full of people who understand and can relate to your feelings and experiences.  Take your time reading through different forums and posts available and posting when you feel comfortable.  There are many people here to help and support you.    

Wishing you comfort and healing,

Gold Raindrops

[Capulet]

Hi @Kenzi - welcome to After Silence.  The folks here are absolutely fantastic and truly are a supportive bunch.  Many have only shared with a select few and even for me, some of the closest people to me do not know of the trauma I've experienced.  It is very hard to find a place where you can feel safe to discuss the effects of trauma, and I'm hopeful that being here will show you that you are by no means alone and that you've got company on this healing journey.  

Wishing you all the best - looking forward to getting to know you.

All the best,
Capulet

[silentg]

Hello @Kenzi,

Welcome to AS! I am sorry for what you endured and what led you here, but you have found a supportive place. I hope it helps you to feel less isolated as it can be difficult to find people who understand what we go through.  I wish you the best as you find your way through this,

g

[BraveOne]

Hi @Kenzi, and Welcome to AS!

It is a pleasure to meet you, even if it is here and for these circumstances.  I am sorry that you have a reason to be here.  Take a look around if you have any questions reach out to any of the NST (Newbie Support Team) and we will be happy to assist you.

BraveOne

[Struggling88]

Hi, Kenzi, and welcome! 

[Kenzi]

Thank you.

It means a lot to feel welcome to speak about my past and not feel so burdensome on the closest people in my life. Most know enough about my past but I often feel bad unloading some of this weight onto them. So I try my best not to. 

I'm happier to have a place to share. However unfortunate the circumstances are... It helps.

Thank you, again.