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    Chico California Area
  • Interests
    Art, Spirituality, Nature, gardening, pets, healing work and helping others. I want to help to change the laws that protect perpetrators and leave survivors without recourse.

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  1. Dasi

    More Aftermath

    Dear Mom, I love you unconditionally. Do you love me unconditionally? If you love the family then, please start a therapy program that will help us, work through these subconscious issues that are devastating us all. I will be your greatest fan and supporter. You will finally be able to understand the love that I have for you. It runs as deep as the Grand Canyon. My wish is that together we can heal and protect the rest of the family from the fallout caused by centuries of the chain of abuse. Without you as an ally I will not be able to reach the rest of the family for full healing.
  2. Dasi

    More Aftermath

    Hello Lacedwithpain, Thank you for your lovely compliments. I have been heavily involved in healing work for 36 years or so. The sadness that accompanies success is difficult, but becomes easier, the more we push the boundaries that keep us imprisoned and feeling alienated from family, friends, and society. My spiritual path opens up like a lotus more and more as I delve deeper into my past through all levels of artistic expression. Writing is my newest creative medium for my voice. My intention is to keep my writing style a little sardonic as I have found humor to be the best medicine for me
  3. Dasi

    More Aftermath

    My father's greatest sins involved the emotional grooming, brainwashing, sabotage, rape and betrayal. After the rape, sometime around my 12th birthday, I made the conscious realization that neither one of my parents would ever provide any meaningful protection for me from anything. At that point I dismissed any of their feeble parenting attempts as simply manipulation tactics. I found an out through my social world and sanctuary among friends. I indulged in drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. I was punished for my rebellion many times over and continue to be to this day. Now, as a mature adu
  4. Dasi

    More Aftermath

    Hello Lacedwithpain, Thank you for your kind complement. Any strength that you may perceive in me is available, to you and, all survivors as well. I see that you are an artist. That means that you have the most powerful tools of all available to you. The artists' process is a potent skill, that taps directly into the core of your being, as I am sure you already know. You can, and probably already do, use this skill as a means of letting go of the old pain and tapping into your highest personal strengths. In other words you recognize my strength only because you possess the same kind of strengt
  5. Dasi

    More Aftermath

    About a year and a half ago there was an event in my life that re-triggered those old suicidal feelings for me. I found a good therapist in my area to re-explore this old crap. Hehehe! We got a lot of excellent work done which lead me to a point where I wanted to arrange to see my perpetrator (dad) again. I had cut off communication with him twenty years ago and the freedom from ever seeing him again was heavenly. I had heard through my dysfunctional family "grapevine" that dad had been having mini strokes. I knew that if I were to finally have closure on my issues that I needed to see him bef
  6. Hello McCloud, I am sorry to hear about your trauma and the aftermath of suffering. I am also a survivor of child sex abuse (csa). You will find people here to be very supportive and helpful. Please feel free to contact me anytime! Dasi
  7. Hello HadriansFail, I am sorry that you have suffered csa! I am also a survivor of csa. Healing is a process that takes patience, and my case PTSD anger lighting the flame of progress! hahaha! Feel free to contact me anytime! You're going through all the right steps! Dasi
  8. Hello martacipi! Welcome to AS! I am sorry that you are suffering so much right now. You are not alone! Please check out this link for a description of consent. http://www.aftersilence.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=96084&hl= Dasi
  9. Hello AnnaBee, I am sorry that you have suffered abuse. I know that you will find members on this site to be very supportive. There are multiple levels to this site that can help you on your healing path. Be sure to contact someone from the newbie support team to get more specifics on how to benefit from this website. Please feel free to contact me anytime as well! Dasi
  10. Hello NewDebs, I am sorry to hear of your csa! I am also a survivor of csa. Please feel free to contact me anytime! Dasi
  11. Hello Emily929! I am sorry that you have suffered such trauma as a child. I am also a survivor of csa. Please feel free to contact me anytime. Dasi
  12. Hello Jessica, I am sorry that you have suffered SA. I believe that you will find this community very welcoming and supportive. Please feel free to contact me anytime! Dasi
  13. Hello bjladams! I am also a csa survivor of an incestuous nature. I have spent all of my life attempting to rise above it, but it comes back to haunt me, particularly upon visiting relatives. Living far away from them helps but, the healing process is quite complex. Welcome to AS! Dasi
  14. I was reading some forum entries from other csa survivors dealing with the exact same family issues of denial that all of us survivors face, particularly during holidays. A poem has come to me. csa, csa, and I just might be on my way, to losing my family for good, to reclaiming myself, as I should. csa, csa, and now I know why I had to move so far away, My family, my best memories, all false They never were really there for me anyway. csa, csa for a solution I do pray I shall start anew, from a different view and watch them fade, when I am through. All my best wishes for family healing
  15. Dasi

    It's My Birthday..

    Belated Happy Birthday Amd! I am hoping that you can find some cheer during these holidays :-) -Dasi
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