My First Step

[arwenhartle]

Hello Everyone.

My Name is Renee. I am a 20 year old college student majoring in Physics. I am an outgoing, fun loving, daredevil who breathes in life. Or, I used to be. That was before I became a victim of rape. It has taken me a long time to finally realize that it changed me. The shroud of denial has come off and now I'm trying to find my way without my soul. I googled 'rape and depression' to try and find some answers. I found this place and thought that maybe it could help. I'm trying to avoid going to counseling, mostly because I refuse to be that vulnerable and weak. Maybe it's not even that. Maybe I'm just scared. Anyway. I'm here. If anything, I guess I'm looking for a friend. I don't want to ask for help, but if anyone can, I'll say that I'd appreciate it.

Thanks.

[sunshinee]

Hi Renee:)

Welcome to Aftersilence. My name is Mandy and I am a part of the Newbie Support Team here at AS. I can answer any questions that you have regarding this site or feel free to drop me a PM if you need a listening ear.

You know realizing that it did affect your life is a big step. I really hope you find what you are looking for here at AS. Maybe counselling isn't for you or it isn't for you right now- but seeing a counsellor doesn't make you weak and vulnerable.

Mandy

[whimsical1]

Welcome to AS.

[John]

Hey Renee,

Welcome to AfterSilence I'm glad to see you here, and it good to know you've come looking for the support you need, that's a very important step in your healing. With therapy, it's not for everyone, but often it's not until you get in their, that you know what it's all about, I remember I was just like you, refused to talk to anyone about my problems for years, because I didn't wanna be weak, but then one day, the school counsellor pulled me aside after my best friend died and asked me if I wanted to talk, and I did, and honestly, having that introduction into therapy was a really big positive for me, because it got me in this mindset, it's not that I'm weak, it's just I've got more hardships then many people, so it's only nature I need help. I now have ana awesome friendship with my therapist (not the school counsellor) another therapist I've came across, and I don't know where I'd be without her help and guidance.

At the end of the day, it's totally up to you, and you need to be comfortable with whatever healing process you're undertaking, but I hope what I've said here has provided some food for thought You know I'm here if you want to talk,

John

[Guest SaraElizabeth]

Hi and welcome to AS - I really hope you get everything you need out of this place.

I refused to go to a counsellor for such a long time, because I didnt want to be weak, and because I was scared. But after a while I realised that it wasnt weak to go to a counsellor and although it was scary it was such a relief when I went for the first time this week, just to talk a little. Counselling maybe isnt for you right now, but dont rule it out forever, in time you may realise its something that could help you if you're ready for it

Sara

[arwenhartle]

Thank you everyone. I hope to find a home here.

[revolution08]

Welcome to AS, Im glad you found us!!

[angelic]

Hi and welcome to AS

[Scared1]

welcome to AS I look forward to seeing you around the boards when you are ready.

[tuliptorn]

Welcome to AS.

Going to therapy is one of the strongest thing you could ever do.

[littlegirllost4ever]

Hello Everyone.

My Name is Renee. I am a 20 year old college student majoring in Physics. I am an outgoing, fun loving, daredevil who breathes in life. Or, I used to be. That was before I became a victim of rape. It has taken me a long time to finally realize that it changed me. The shroud of denial has come off and now I'm trying to find my way without my soul. I googled 'rape and depression' to try and find some answers. I found this place and thought that maybe it could help. I'm trying to avoid going to counseling, mostly because I refuse to be that vulnerable and weak. Maybe it's not even that. Maybe I'm just scared. Anyway. I'm here. If anything, I guess I'm looking for a friend. I don't want to ask for help, but if anyone can, I'll say that I'd appreciate it.

Thanks.

Welcome Renee,

I hope you find comfort here. I'm saddened to and my heart aches for you about what happened to you and also the that you believe in seeking help from a counselor would make you weak. Its actually a very courageous thing to do as is your posting here. Having a therapist help me is the best thing I ever did for myself. We are all here for ya hun.

[MidnightSunshine531]

welcome to AS

[Graice]

Hi Renee

welcome to after silence..We are a caring and validating group here and we are glad you found us You will find that you matter to us here

hugs

graice

[Annabel]

Welcome to AS

if ok

Annabel

[sexy4lif]

Hello Everyone.

My Name is Renee. I am a 20 year old college student majoring in Physics. I am an outgoing, fun loving, daredevil who breathes in life. Or, I used to be. That was before I became a victim of rape. It has taken me a long time to finally realize that it changed me. The shroud of denial has come off and now I'm trying to find my way without my soul. I googled 'rape and depression' to try and find some answers. I found this place and thought that maybe it could help. I'm trying to avoid going to counseling, mostly because I refuse to be that vulnerable and weak. Maybe it's not even that. Maybe I'm just scared. Anyway. I'm here. If anything, I guess I'm looking for a friend. I don't want to ask for help, but if anyone can, I'll say that I'd appreciate it.

Thanks.

Hi Renee, I jus wanna say I know how you feel cuz i been through the same thing. Yesterday marked the one year point since it happened. I felt compelled to respond to you because you sound just like me. I did all the things youre saying. I googled all kinds of things just to find a way to deal with everything cuz it felt like too much. I understand where ur comin from about not wantin to go to counseling. Bein on this helped me a lot bcuz I was able to get everything off ma chest and not feel judged or like nobody understood bcuz i know that every single person here has been thru wat i have been thru. If you need to talk at anytime Im here to listen bcuz I know how that is and I just wanna help any way I can. Take care.

[omally]

Hi renee, welcome to as, counselling is not for the weak, it takes a strong person to tell their worries and fears,but from telling, there is a release from emotions, there are other opinions to be influenced by, and there is freedom to be found. i like you am fun, outgoing, cheeky and adorable, but at the moment i am in hiding just gathering up the strength to make a mighty comeback. im sorry for what has happened to you i hope you will find comfort and friendship here,