BabyDeepBlue

I feel a little down.  It is kind of early in the year for me to feel like this.  Maybe it is because the holidays are coming up.  The only reason I really celebrate anything is because of my children.  Other than that, it is just a different day for me.  I have nothing to look forward to. My pawpaw's birthday has already passed. He passed away before Thanksgiving.  My uncle has been gone for just a little over a week.  My daddy's birthday is December 1st.  He has been gone now for 28 years now. I lost my mommaw on Christmas day.  My best friend in the whole world I lost New Years day at about 2 am.  The holidays hold nothing special for me.  I also wonder what my life would have been like if my daddy had not died.  I know I would not have been raped or molested or if I was, my daddy would have killed them.  My daddy and my best friend was my whole world.  Life is truly plain and simple a bit*h.