Hi Everybody

[1(laya)heart]

I joined a fews days ago. I've made several replies to other people but, what I JUST REALIZED is that I've kindof been hiding from what I REALLY NEED to say.

Which I FEEL is:

I really need support.

I was raped four times. 2X'S by my old neighbors nephew, then he got mad at me and told some local guys who lived on my street that i was easy. They gang raped me and the last assault was when one of those guys came back and attacked me again. I need to hear from someone who has gone through what I've gone through.

I want someone to tell me that they are here for me and that they are willing to listen to me (be it cry,vent, scream whatever). I'm not trying to be needy. I'm trying very hard to STAY PRESENT and be true to what I NEED.

O.K. now that THAT'S said, about me: I'm 31 years old, a black native american woman (Lakota Sioux),

I'm one of Jehovah's Witnesses, an audio engineer and stronger than I've ever been in my whole life.

I KNOW THAT I'M GOING TO BE O.K. I JUST NEED A LITTLE SUPPORT.

Thank you from the bottom of my laya (heart) for helping me with the strength to speak up. All of your stories make me feel understood.

Edited October 23, 2006 by 1(laya)heart

[drowning000]

Im glad youve found this site.. im sure you will feel understood everyday when you come here. It is a lovely place where everyone can share, give, take, and grow. Sorry to hear about what happened to you, i hope your pain will ease with us here.

[1(laya)heart]

THANKS FOR RESPONDING SO FAST. I APPRECIATE YOUR WORDS. Keep the words coming, but please know that i'm here for you too.

[foxy]

Hi and welcome.

I hope you find AS a safe place for sharing and support.

Take care

Edited October 23, 2006 by foxy

[dodo]

Hi and welcome to AS

That is a hugely positive thing to be able to say 'I NEED....' there will always be someone here to answer to your needs.

Best wishes

karen

[sueellen]

Hi and welcome. To be able to stay present and to state that you NEED is huge. Wish all the best for you and I know that you will find all the support that you need on this site. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Sue

[Becky]

Welcome to AS

I'm glad you found us. I hope you find all the support you need and more!

[Lindy]

Hi sweetie and welcome to After Silence.

I'm sorry you've endured so much. I'm glad you found this wonderful and supportive community.

Take gentle care,

Lindy

[bnkrldy]

Hi I am glad you found this place as well! It is so nice to find such love and support. I still have not really shared my story so kudos to you soooooooooo brave and courageous!

bnkrldy

[Magdelena]

Welcome and good for you for stating your needs. We all need the same thing here, so I completely relate

We are all here for you. We will all listen. I hope you find what you need.

[Nobodys_Angel]

Welcome, I am glad you are here! These people here are amazing at supporting, you don't realize what you are missing till you get here.