BalueMana

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    459
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About BalueMana

  • Rank
    Out of the Mist

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  • Location Southern US
  1. Been Hanging Around Here For A Bit

    Hey TDrop, You are dealing with a tough issue - So it's certainly ok and I hope you'll be patient with yourself - Please realize, you took a huge step coming here - then another deciding to join- then another in conversing with others and now this post where you shared your general situation. all these things are BIG steps for people like us - trust is not an easy thing usually and you showed that aspect of you is not willing to give up!! I like that! what's that saying: the journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step. You've made that - and more - at a great pace. BE PROUD!!! Sending Blessings, Balue
  2. What Careers/jobs Are You All Doing?

    My favorite Job is Mommie!! To the greatest son on earth.... (I'm a bit bias. ) But to earn a buck or two - I'm a Systems Analyst. Never went to school for it - it was sorta a nack for me. I have an uncanning ability to take something "unbreakable" and break it - or take something broken and figure out how to fix it. (I'm sure my boss had a though sale trying to take a secretary and promote her to a systems analyst though.) Those of you who don't know what you want to do - don't pressure yourself - just be true to the things that you have a passion for and chances are - you'll end up with something that makes you very happy. Remember, the job does not have to define you. Life is so much more than what you do for a living. Wishing you all the best and a year greater than any you've ever had before! Balue
  3. General Age Of Forum

    35.... I mean..... 35 No I mean... 35 Balue
  4. Hello

    Hi Awaamir... Welcome to A.S. Take your time posting and I Look forward to getting to know you. Blessings, Balue
  5. New

    Consider Yourself Part Of the Family Sorry the past brings you here - but really glad you found us. It really is a wonderful place to hang out as you journey through the myst. I look forward to getting to know you, Blessed Be, Balue
  6. Male Survivor (poss Triggs)

    Hi Dan, I would like to extend a welcome to you as well. I'm so sorry for the matters of the past that bring you here - but want to thank you for sharing your site with us. It is very informative and interesting. I've looked at it several times. I even have it book marked - I don't get much spare time - but the journal is very well written and very nice to read. You said you were lookiing for a Ghost writer. Dan, I honestly do not believe you need one. You are not giving yourself enough credit - if you wrote that site - you can most certainly hold an audiances attention in a book. What has you stumped about writing your book? Is it a hard time putting all the pieces in a book format? If you are having that issue with it - there are ways to get past that - but I wont' belabor something if it is not the matter you are struggling with. You did say the language - but from the sound of your writting - the language is good - I assure you. I'm a bit confused but intrigued. I hope I have not offended you with anything I have said here - I mean no disrespect - just seriously think you would write a great book and would like to see that happen for you. I hope this post finds you well, Balue
  7. Need More Support?

    LOL!!!!!!!- I'm sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyy, but saw you banned her - so my welcome was pretty useless...... If you guys want her banned I bow to the wishes of the majority. I felt a "proper" welcome was the "loving" thing to do - I guess my heart went out to her flower child words and her precious age - but I had no idea you had "previous" dealings with this location. All that seems to make a difference. If she was a doop of the mentally challenged founder of that site - then banning is the only option. If she was a lone ranger with bad judgement - then I think second chances are in order... Perhaps the only thing we can do is call Miss Cleo and ask for a reading of her mind!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! If Miss Cleo is not available then I reckon a coin toss would work just as well. Oh and if you want I can repost that welcome ......... soo sorry for editing and now the thread seems to have holes in it. Sending all my love, Balue
  8. Need More Support?

    Sweet Annie, I'm sorry you feel triggered by the response you got here. Two wrongs would not make a right - so for this side of the matter - please accept our heart felt apologies. Yes, profanity may have not been necessary - however, YOU, a victim should be able to relate to the feeling of being violated and understand the volatile nature of the response that can bring. Posting on the net - in an environment that you are unfamiliar with should have an element of consideration and tact to it - if you wish your communication to well received by the masses. In other words... as others have pointed out....one lovely post would have sufficed. It is the utter bombardment of your message that counteracted the peaceful nature :inn: of the verbiage - and destroyed the sincerity of the message. Bringing to question the true intention behind your posts. Your being 14 I can understand how the nuances of these social prowess might have been unbeknownst to you - I hope that you can learn from this experience in your future www dealings and that no further internet communities will be subjected to the same violation that brought pain to my friends. We are a very sincere community and are dedicated to protecting one another as best we can with our limited internet ability - It is this "mother pitbull" nature that you invoked in my friends. I'm sure being on the recieving end of this mindset was not pleasant - but I'm very proud of their tireless dedication to each other. Wishing you a Productive Journey, Balue
  9. Kind Of New.....

    Healing Cop, I'm so sorry you are having this to deal with - it's it's even sadder to know this has happened to a person dedicated to making the world safe for perfect strangers - (although I confess, it's nice to see a fellow Atlantan. ) I can only imagine the mix of emotions that must be turning within. To be a cop and have this happen must create a unique web of emotions to deal with. However I want to say, I am an ever greatfull member of the society in which you directly help make safe. Knowing that you perform this often thankless task while dealing with this personal injustice - makes me ever more humbled. For whatever it is worth................ THANK YOU A MILLION TIMES OVER. If there is ANYTHING I can do to help you or just lend an ear - consider me "here". Sending The Best of Wishes to "my" gal in Blue, Balue
  10. New

    I'm glad you found here too - it's always mixed emotions when a new person arrives - Glad we've found each other - but sad there are so many of us .... No pressures to post OKAY? - take your time and I hope you come to feel as at home here as I do. Sending Best Wishes of Healing, Balue
  11. Yep, I'm New...

    Welcome Ardatha, I'm glad you found here - and glad to hear your healing journey has hit calmer waters... Yes, I know to well how, no matter how past it you are, it can still creep up and surprise you with a new angle to slap you from - that's how I ended up here too. Two statements you made really hit home with me. that first one - must be something AssH*les pass along to one another - it was my fathers favorite expression as well. You could have an ax sticking out of your head and he'd still say it. That second one - Was my Xhusbands - for thirteen years - if I cried, 9 times outta 10 - he'd respond with a sarcastic...... Weyannhhhhhh!! :baby: - used to make me bullistic!! I did finally learn not to cry so much though- shedded very few tears AFTER I decided to leave him.... . Anyway, welcome to the site and I look forward to getting to know you. Balue
  12. Hi, I'm New

    Hi Laina, That's a very beautiful name. Welcome to the site. I know that feeling of eating away at you - not a good one at all. Sorry you're wrestling with that. Please feel free to relax- take your time reading and post whenever you are ready. Wishing you much healing, Balue
  13. howdy

    I found this site that gave me some info on it.... Click here for 411 on BodyWork Blessed Be, Balue
  14. Hi - I'm New Here!!!!

    Hi Ruby, I'm glad you found this place - it seems to be a wonderful environment for learning to live through the past. You were looking for people who can relate............ HI I'M BALUE I'm a 34 y.o. survivor of mental/physical and sexual abuse. I consider myself as healed as you get from these things. I have been addicted to narcotics - and drank WAYYYYYY too much - Both are past. so I understand addiction and the fight to not be addicted. Although I'm not now nor have I ever been in rahab for them - So I might not be much help in that area. I do know a little about the process though. I was in an codependent marriage for 13 years that was full of B*llshit followed by a long term codependent NIGHTMARE cohabitation after that. I left this last relationship with a 3 month old son. It was my decision, I just got tired of all the dyfunction and said that is it - I will not raise my child like this- I've been without a relationship for the past year - and I want it that way. From one codependent to the other - I am just not taking a chance on my radar till I'm sure I won't pick a person from a codependent place. So, there are my areas of simularity.........Please consider me here for you anytime you need an ear. Welcome and blessings, Balue
  15. Hi This Is My First Time Here

    Samantha, I'm sorry you have had so much to deal with. I would like to offer my welcome as well. Additionally, the part of your post that sticks out to me most- is your age and that you have not told. I whole heartedly believe you should tell someone- I understand how hard that can be - I was 15 when I shared my secret with my mom. Would you be comfortable discussing why you feel you cannot tell? Perhaps we can talk you through some of your concerns with telling and get you past the apprehension. Honey, the truth has a way of letting itself be known - please don't make it harder on yourself - You brother NEEDS HELP. You need validation and healing - The secret is not helping either of you. Please, let us help you get comfortable enough to talk. Blessings to you, Balue