Hi, New Here

[courage anew]

Tonight is my first night posting.

Sometime I'd like to hear from others who were brought up in the church and assualted by another christian.

We were talking about what we learned at church on Sunday and looking stuff up in the Bible 4 hours before everything changed - it's left me really confused.

I've dealt with a lot through counseling, but still questions lingure in my mind.

[kayte]

Hi Courage anew. Welcome to AS. I'm glad you found us.

I wasn't abused by anyone in church, but I am a Christian.

I guess I just want to say that going to church doesn't make anyone a Christian.. anymore than sitting in a garage makes someone a car.

Lots of people go to church that aren't there because of God...

If you want to talk, please feel free to PM me.

[Donna]

I am sorry for what you have been through, please know that you're not alone with your feelings or emotions though. I also wasn't abused within the church but I am sure if you post about it some within the board others may come forward and share the same as you.

Keep safe and welcome to AS.

[nicole m.]

HI! Welcome to AS!

I wasn't abused by anyone in a church. But I do agree with what Kayte said about someone going to church dosen't exactly make them a Christian. Anyway, I'm sorry for what you went through. Maybe there are others here that could help you better and they have been through something similiar to your experience.

[drowning000]

Hello and Welcome to AS courage

[~Catherine~]

Welcome to AS, hon

:hug:

Catherine

[courage anew]

Hi Courage anew. Welcome to AS. I'm glad you found us.

I wasn't abused by anyone in church, but I am a Christian.

I guess I just want to say that going to church doesn't make anyone a Christian.. anymore than sitting in a garage makes someone a car.

Lots of people go to church that aren't there because of God...

If you want to talk, please feel free to PM me.

I know that his words don't make him a Christian, but do his actions say that he isn't? I've always been taught that our relationship with God is between our heart and his. Sometimes being a Chrstian gives me an entire sent of difficulties that I don't know I would otherwise have. I'm supposed to forgive him, I'm supposed to be ok with God forgiving him. I'm supposed to be ok knowing that he may one day be in heaven with me - and I know if he is that when I get there it won't be like it is now when I see him around town, I want God to care more about me than he does "him", but that isn't how God's love works.

[Butterflyangelbaby]

Hey Welcome to AS

Glad to have you here

[holdingthechild26]

Welcome to AS, this is a great place!

[Karolina]

Hi! I was abused by the pastor from the church which I have attended. If you would like to talk feel free to write. I am also new here...

[kayte]

Hi Courage anew. Welcome to AS. I'm glad you found us.

I wasn't abused by anyone in church, but I am a Christian.

I guess I just want to say that going to church doesn't make anyone a Christian.. anymore than sitting in a garage makes someone a car.

Lots of people go to church that aren't there because of God...

If you want to talk, please feel free to PM me.

I know that his words don't make him a Christian, but do his actions say that he isn't? I've always been taught that our relationship with God is between our heart and his. Sometimes being a Chrstian gives me an entire sent of difficulties that I don't know I would otherwise have. I'm supposed to forgive him, I'm supposed to be ok with God forgiving him. I'm supposed to be ok knowing that he may one day be in heaven with me - and I know if he is that when I get there it won't be like it is now when I see him around town, I want God to care more about me than he does "him", but that isn't how God's love works.

His actions say that he isn't.

No, we can't judge another person to condemn them. We can't know the depth's of people's hearts. But God did give us the job of being 'fruit inspectors' and this is rotten, poisoness fruit.

I understand being a Christian gives you a different set of difficulties... the whole forgiveness thing, for one. But in reality, it is to help you avoid other very real difficulties. We all know that bitterness and anger eats us up. It doesn't hurt the one we're bitter toward... it just hurts us.

The thing about being okay with God forgiving him, I guess the way I look at it is that if he goes to God and asks for forgiveness for what he did to you, then wouldn't that be a good thing? Wouldn't that mean that what he did to you is eating him up inside and tormenting him? Wouldn't it mean that he knows how wretched this sin against you and God was?

At first, I couldn't forgive. All I could do was be willing to let God work that out in me. One day God asked me if I wanted them to go to hell for what they'd done to me. Not for anything else... just for what they'd done to me personally. I cried, I screamed, I tried to wiggle my way around it... but when I saw it for what it really was, my answer was no. That burden was lifted from me that day, and it's given me peace. I no longer have any desire to hold their feet to the fire. It's all between them and God now and I'm okay with that. The outcome doesn't have anything to do with me. (Although I do find myself praying for them often. It feels so good to do that!)

I don't know if any of this helps... just some stuff to think about.