Darby25

It’s been two years. Two years of crying at the drop of a hat, two years of wincing anytime I’m touched, two years of fighting to survive. Everyday in those two years I have held back tears when someone looks like you, when I realize what was taken. Two years isn’t a long time, but for me it’s been excruciating. I know your eyes still light up, and I know that you can smile and mean it. Meanwhile, every small smile takes more energy than it should. Every time I laugh, it sounds fake, it feels fake. When I get that moment of calm, not needing to run around to deal with all that keeps me busy, I

Sometimes when I'm sitting alone, i think of what we may have been if you didn't break me. Would I fall in love with you? Would we still be friends? Would you have been my first, the person I fell hard for and gave it all up to? I know this thinking is dangerous and does nothing but upset me because I will never know. I will never know if your kiss made light up like fireworks in the sky. I will never know if my skin tingled with every touch. I will never know because you didnt give me any choice. You didn't allow me memories. I know all of this is silly, the thinking of a broken little girl w

The waves crash against the dock as I watch the sun set. I breathe in the fresh year and think that I finally found my home. My heart has belonged to the lake since I was a baby. I’ve never felt safer at any place in my life. Whenever things get rough, the pictures I worked so hard on bring me back to the ground. The orange-yellow sky as I sit on a bench by the shore. The people walking their dogs or holding hands with significant others fade. The only thing I see is the water, reflecting everything around me. I’m in love. The lake is the strongest love I’ve ever experienced. Every moment I’m

Dear “Friend”, I never thought you would be the recipient of one of these letters, but as I’ve dealt with all of this, my true feelings are becoming more evident. I blame you for this. I told you he was a bad person, I told you I didn’t want him in my life, in our lives. No one listened. You were all selfish, and after you were even more selfish than I thought possible. Instead of supporting me, you kept him in your life. You talked to him, let him think he had a chance to get in your pants. You took pictures with him and posted them on Snapchat, and when I blocked you, you to

Hi, My name is Darby and I just joined this forum, I'm hoping it will help me with my recovery.