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Not Sure I Belong Here, Saying Hello

writeon

By writeon,
in Public: Welcome!

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writeon

writeon

Posted
Posted

Hi there. I thought I should introduce myself since I have posted under 'share your story', and have been checking in for the last few days.

First I want to say that I am inspired by the courage so many of you show. You are an amazing group of people.

I am not sure if some of the things that happened to me in my early adolescence and teen years 'count' as sexual assault. Things stopped short of rape. But there were instances where either my young age or alcohol make me suspect that I was in abusive situations with older boys/young men due to inability to consent.

I suspect that there is something to that, because I feel differently about one or two incidents than I do about many other things I chose to do with boyfriends or aquantainces. Things I do not think were wise looking back in retrospect, but that I was a willing participant in for sure.

Anyway, just trying to sort these things out in my head. Thanks for reading!

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lacrymosa

lacrymosa

Posted
Posted

Hi Writon,

I'm glad you've joined After Silence. Please rest assured that you are indeed welcome here. I'm sorry about what you've had to endure, and can understand feeling a bit confused about how to classify trauma. At AS, we don't worry about such distinctions. We are your peers, many of whom have survived similar nightmares, and can relate. You joined because you know deep down that these experiences have traumatized you, and continue to haunt your life, yes? That's why we're all here. We want to heal, and rebuild. :)

I think one of the best things about our community is the fact that people here truly understand, and can relate. It's comforting to know you're not alone, and that others feel the same way, and have had similar thoughts and reactions in response to similar traumas.

Thanks for introducing yourself, and allowing us to welcome you. If you have any questions, or just need someone to talk to, feel free to message me. Take care, and I'll see you around the site. :):hug:

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brokencrown

brokencrown

Posted
Posted

welcome to as!! let us know if you have any questions or if we can help!! :luck:

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writeon

writeon

Posted
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Posted

Hi - thank you for your response. I posted a little of my story on the 'share your story' site. It is just fuzzy. First there are parts I don't remember. And it seems that it is a little fuzzy - what is consent, really? All the websites say that if alcohol is involved that can render a person unable to consent. I don't know. I go back and forth between thinking "oh my gosh, I think that was assault," and "seriously, stop whining - if it was an assault for real you would not have any question". Ugh. Anyway. Thanks for the post and have a good night!

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*buttafly*

*buttafly*

Posted
Posted

Hello and Welcome Writeon.

Sometimes even the we know these memoies to be true, we often attempt to push them out, or explain them away because we dont want to believe them. I do hope that you can sort this out for yourself.

:butterfly:

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