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nat025

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i was so happy to come across this site the other day. it is a place where i can talk bout things that none of my friends or sister would understand. i am a survivor or child molestation. i was molested from 8 to 9 years old. he was my neighbor's boyfriend. her name was christine and she was like a grandmother to me. when my parents found out about us. i couldnt believe that what we were doing was wrong. i thought it was normal what we were doing. when my parents confronted her about him she didnt believe me. she thought i was making all of it up. i could never of made up the things i told her. no eight year old would ever know the sexual things i did. we moved after that. i cant really remember how it started. all i know is i had to shut myself down everytime it hurt because i thought it was normal and i didnt know any different. i thought i loved him and he was my boyfriend.

i am know almost twenty and i still think about it. i want to find out where he is know and i want to ask him milliions of questions. i havent been able to have a real relationship. everytime someone gets to close i end it. i think im disgusting, used, i think that no man would want to stick around after he knows all the things i went through.

im new here and i would love to meet some new friends that have survived. everytime i think about it i just thank God he picked me instead of my sister. i would never want her to live with the memories or crap that i carry around with me every day.

natalie

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Hi Natalie,

I'm so sorry that happened to you. Nobody should ever have to endure something like that. I'm also new to this site, and a rape survivor. If you ever need to talk to someone, there's many of us here.

Best wishes!!

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Welcome to After Silence, Natalie :flowers:

I am glad you found us. I understand how difficult it can be to talk to real life friends about this, my friends were horribly unsupportive and being able to connect with people online was extremely helpful to me. Best of luck in your healing.

Nicole :throb:

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