New and Afraid

[Chelsea30]

Hi, everyone. I'm new here. Honestly, I'm very afraid to be here, and I'm not sure I really belong. I found this site while trying to find some answers. I've been in therapy for a little over a year for anxiety, depression, and PTSD. I have flashbacks multiple times a week, but they are mainly emotional or with fragmented images and very critical thoughts. I've always had difficulty with memory and dissociation. The last few weeks, I've had flashbacks in the form of physical sensations and images that I'm honestly terrified of facing. I've always known there was physical and emotional abuse, but this is more than I can handle alone, even with a therapist and my husband, who is trying his best to support me. I keep going back and forth between trusting these flashbacks and refusing to believe it. I'm confused, afraid, and feeling so alone. I'm just hoping for some support.

[Poppy_]

Hi, @Chelsea30 - 

Welcome to After Silence! I'm sorry to hear of everything you're going through and dealing with. You are certainly not alone here, though. I hope that we are able to help you in the way you need! This place is so supportive and has been my rock many, many times. I hope that we can do the same for you. 

If you need anything at all, please feel free to reach out to me! I'm always around  

Hugs if you want them,
Poppy

[Lovelylady]

Hi, I’m new here also. Welcome to the group. I hope you find what you seek here.

[missfrier]

QDear chelsea

I would like to welcome you to After Silence's forums.  We are all here for you and want to support you in any way we can. I know that posting for the first time can be scary.  Please don't worry, though; you will always be given so much support from our lovely community and its members.  You're not alone - we are with you 

Take care and keep reaching out!! 

 
 

[SurviveRecover]

Welcome.

[GreenBayGirl]

Welcome @Chelsea30. I'm sorry for the events that have ultimately caused you to join this group but know you are welcome here. I know that feeling of aloneness all too well, but that's what this site is for. It took me a little while to become familiar and comfortable with the forums and posting, but the people here are so supportive. AS has been immensely helpful to me and I hope you find love, comfort, and acceptance here. 

Peace and love,

GBG

[8888]

Welcome @Chelsea30 to After Silence.  I’m sorry for what brought you here but I’m happy you are here reaching out for support.   Good job taking this step in your healing process.  You are not alone and what happened to you wasn’t your fault.  It's understandable to be afraid to be here. Take your time exploring and post when you are ready.  If you have any questions feel free to message me. 

[marcyabadeer]

@Chelsea30 welcome to after silence  

 

sam🖤

[MeBeMary]

10 hours ago, Chelsea30 said:

Hi, everyone. I'm new here. Honestly, I'm very afraid to be here, and I'm not sure I really belong. I found this site while trying to find some answers. I've been in therapy for a little over a year for anxiety, depression, and PTSD. I have flashbacks multiple times a week, but they are mainly emotional or with fragmented images and very critical thoughts. I've always had difficulty with memory and dissociation. The last few weeks, I've had flashbacks in the form of physical sensations and images that I'm honestly terrified of facing. I've always known there was physical and emotional abuse, but this is more than I can handle alone, even with a therapist and my husband, who is trying his best to support me. I keep going back and forth between trusting these flashbacks and refusing to believe it. I'm confused, afraid, and feeling so alone. I'm just hoping for some support.

Hi Chelsea,

Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for all that you have been thru and also the things you are unsure of. I know how difficult the uncertainty can be. Do know you are not alone. Many of us question things we aren't sure of, but had strong enough feelings to think a place like this can give insight and support. The question you wonder about if you belong...many have had those same thoughts, myself being one. You are welcomed here and you will not find judgment on what you are uncertain and confused about. We understand.

I am sorry you are struggling, but you are not alone. We are with you as you try to piece together the things you need to and walk this path of healing.

Mary

 

[Shefloats]

Hi and welcome! I’m new here to and can I can definitely relate to parts of what you’re saying! You aren’t alone. 

[Chelsea30]

13 hours ago, MeBeMary said:

Hi Chelsea,

Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for all that you have been thru and also the things you are unsure of. I know how difficult the uncertainty can be. Do know you are not alone. Many of us question things we aren't sure of, but had strong enough feelings to think a place like this can give insight and support. The question you wonder about if you belong...many have had those same thoughts, myself being one. You are welcomed here and you will not find judgment on what you are uncertain and confused about. We understand.

I am sorry you are struggling, but you are not alone. We are with you as you try to piece together the things you need to and walk this path of healing.

Mary

 

Thank you, and everyone, so much. I was honestly waiting to be turned away or ignored, and it's taken me a while to feel comfortable enough to reply. The uncertainty is such a heavy weight. It makes me wonder if I'm some sick person making things up or if all of this is real. I don't know when I'll fully believe myself, but I don't feel so isolated anymore. Maybe in the coming weeks, I'll feel comfortable enough sharing my story.