Trying to hang on

[SarahSlays]

I have been assaulted 4 times in my life. The first time I was 15 and again at 17. I received help years after and had healed a lot.

That was until i was attacked at 24. I developed ptsd and fell apart all over again. I still struggle because of constant reminders but did receive professional help.

The last time was recently. I am 26 years old. This can’t keep happening. I don’t know what it is about me. I was without insurance for a while and am currently waiting for treatment and my new medications to work. Basically I’m barely hanging on and i really need some extra support right now.

[Capulet]

Welcome to AS.  I am sorry for the circumstances that have brought you here, but hope you find all of the support that you need!

We're a great bunch, I promise.

Take gentle care of yourself, and feel free to browse and look around.  You will find you are not alone!

Best wishes.

Capulet

 

[reglois]

     

[Srmajah]

Sarahslays. First up it is not your fault  its about power contol. You are not alone in this you are a survivor  and a warrior. If you havnt already reach out to your local svu and get this reported an 2 when possible  seek ptsd counseling. Safe hugs and smiles on their way

[Painnbroken]

12 hours ago, SarahSlays said:

I have been assaulted 4 times in my life. The first time I was 15 and again at 17. I received help years after and had healed a lot.

That was until i was attacked at 24. I developed ptsd and fell apart all over again. I still struggle because of constant reminders but did receive professional help.

The last time was recently. I am 26 years old. This can’t keep happening. I don’t know what it is about me. I was without insurance for a while and am currently waiting for treatment and my new medications to work. Basically I’m barely hanging on and i really need some extra support right now.

Welcome to AS!  I am truly sorry for all you’ve endured.  Please know known of this was your fault. You will find you are not alone here and that there is a lot of supportive people.  Take your time and look around the forums.  You can say as much or as little as you like.  Best wishes on your healing journey. 

PB

[silentg]

Hello @SarahSlays,

Welcome to AS! I am sorry for the repeated traumas you have endured. I can relate to wondering 'why does this keep happening'. I know there is nothing you did to make it happen, perps choose their actions, and it is not your fault.  I hope your treatment becomes available soon, and meanwhile please do hang on, we understand, and we are here to listen and support you.

[Struggling88]

Hi, SarahSlays, and welcome! 

[MeBeMary]

On 2/7/2018 at 12:11 AM, SarahSlays said:

I have been assaulted 4 times in my life. The first time I was 15 and again at 17. I received help years after and had healed a lot.

That was until i was attacked at 24. I developed ptsd and fell apart all over again. I still struggle because of constant reminders but did receive professional help.

The last time was recently. I am 26 years old. This can’t keep happening. I don’t know what it is about me. I was without insurance for a while and am currently waiting for treatment and my new medications to work. Basically I’m barely hanging on and i really need some extra support right now.

Hi Sarah,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for the traumas that you have experienced, but you have found a very supportive site. As the others have mentioned, being hurt was never your fault. The blame goes to these abusers and not you. Your confusion and struggles are unfortunately normal. I think the truth is these creeps have a sick sixth sense on who is vulnerable and who has been hurt before. That makes them disgusting and wrong to take advantage like this. I'm sorry you've been hurt. I am glad you have found us. I wish you well on your continuing journey of healing.

Mary

 

[BeeKnee]

I am so sorry

I hope as a society we can get to a point where women don't have to ask what it is about them. What is it about men that they keep abusing women?

Welcome, I hope you can find some support in your struggles here.

[SarahSlays]

On 2/7/2018 at 5:56 AM, Srmajah said:

Sarahslays. First up it is not your fault  its about power contol. You are not alone in this you are a survivor  and a warrior. If you havnt already reach out to your local svu and get this reported an 2 when possible  seek ptsd counseling. Safe hugs and smiles on their way

Unfortunatley I did report immediately following the attack’s the last two times. The first time the cop was a complete jerk. He actually said to me “are you really all that upset by this?”. Despite dna evidence they still refused to prosecute my case. 

And mst recently even though there was video evidence and the cop did all he could, they also didn’t prosecute. I’ve given up on any form of justice.

[SarahSlays]

Thank you for your support though. I am about to start counseling again for what feels like thousandth time.

[lexip]

I can relate to being assaulted more than once, I am sorry for everything you have endured

 

 

lexi