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  1. Hello everyone! I've been looking for a place like this for a while. where I could find people with similar stories and so I knew i wasn't alone. My name is Lillian, I'm 17. I'm looking to find peace, and hoping some of you can help me and I can help you in return.
  2. I've joined this site looking for help and answers. I was sexually assaulted about a year ago and I experienced PTSD symptoms the other day. I don't know what triggers me thinking about these things and thinking about it, it just happens sometimes. I think about it more and more and when I do I almost experience it again. I found myself clenching my fists and resisted hurting myself (which is a big step for me) I felt the pain all over again even though I've blocked this guys number and I have a loving boyfriend who is trying to help me through this. Sometimes I find I trigger myself on purpos
  3. I'm new. I'm a Capricorn and I like dogs.
  4. Hello. I am new here. . I have a strong fear of sharing the secret side of me, but it is slowly getting better. I am a mom. One I had at 12, due to my rapist. I have never meant her. She is 18 and I dream she one day finds me. This isn't possible because it was something called a black market adoption.
  5. beckwhatheheck

    Belief

    I have always been afraid to speak of my mistreatment. I carried it around with me because I was always told it was my fault. Everyone always told me who I was, I never had the chance to myself. So I have stayed silent. I took the pain and turned it into a smile. This smile wasn't just an ordinary smile, there were many elements to it. Confusion, fear, anger, sadness, hopelessness... It felt like the weight of the world and I felt it all alone. I also felt happiness. I felt it when I felt the warmth of my mothers hugs. I felt it when my friends told a joke and made me laugh until my ab musucle
  6. Hello everyone, My name is Rebekah and I am new to after silence. It's been seven years and I am finally breaking my silence. It's unbelievably scary but I am hoping that this group can help me learn to heal and grow. I am somewhat confused on how to use some of the forums but hopefully will figure it out soon. It's so nice to have a safe place to talk to others. I haven't had this before and it's really comforting in a very intimidating place I am in right now.
  7. I'm very new to this group, first day. Just wanted to say hello, and let you know that I am here, reading what you are posting. I am a survivor of severe sexual trauma. I'm anxious to tell my story, but would rather read the guidelines and get a feel for everything first. Take care, ScaredButStrong
  8. Hi I'm SJD but you can call me SJ I'm a survivor like most of you. I am here to connect with other female survivors and get some advice/validation about certain things. I had done a sight similar to this in the past but had a really bad experience with it. Hoping this is better. I would like to have access to the chat rooms and to the female only forums and probably some others as my time goes on. A bit about me: I am a 21 year old College student and I am studying psychology. I want to get my masters in counseling and have a private practice that will focus mainly on
  9. Not sure if I am posting in the right place, just wanted to say hi and that I am a new member. My name is Eve, and I am 20 years old.
  10. ........hi im kinda scared to say hi please dont be mean....
  11. Hi, I've been going thru a lot of things. and I don't know where to turn. thank you. hope everyone has a great day :D
  12. Hello everyone, I don't know if being a part of this site will help me, but I figure it is worth a shot. I've been feeling very alone, and I have been looking for people to talk to. I've yet to tell anyone what happened aside from my therapist, so until I find the courage to tell them I'm hoping everyone here can make me feel less alone.
  13. Hello, my name is Katie,and i am 16 years old. I enjoy music, video games and reading, I go to a student-led school which means we make all the rules and guidelines, and i take all my classes online as this is how the school works. So, i hope to be able to go on after silence a lot and start my journey back onto the good and healthy path of adolescence after the trauma. I am a diagnosed GAD (had it since i was little) and i have had a Depression Disorder since Middle school. Since my abuse both have become considerably worse, and i wanna work on becoming the person i was before. My goal on aft
  14. Hello, my name is Katie,and i am 16 years old. I enjoy music, video games and reading, I go to a student-led school which means we make all the rules and guidelines, and i take all my classes online as this is how the school works. So, i hope to be able to go on after silence a lot and start my journey back onto the good and healthy path of adolescence after the trauma. I am a diagnosed GAD (had it since i was little) and i have had a Depression Disorder since Middle school. Since my abuse both have become considerably worse, and i wanna work on becoming the person i was before. My goal on aft
  15. Hello, everyone! I'm so glad I found this place - all the other survivor forums were very inactive... Um, I go by KJ on the internet. I'm 19, and a lover of all things psychology. I love writing, reading and painting. I used to love performing on a stage, singing and dancing but haven't been able to do that for a while. I'm diagnosed with depression, anxiety and PTSD. I've been in counseling for a couple of years. I thought it was time for me to find a safe place for deeper healing and discussion of the deeper issues. I'm excited to meet everyone and post things and read helpful things.
  16. Hi, I'm new to the site, I'm a survivor and am looking to hear from and speak with other people. Thanks.
  17. Hi, I'm Gabie, and I'm new to After Silence. I'm hoping I can get the support that I've been wishing I received years ago. I'm excited to speak to and hear from other people. <3
  18. Hi everyone, I just wanted to introduce myself. I'm 20 years old and live in Dublin. I am very very new to all of this, it has only been about 36 hours since what happened happened. I haven't fully wrapped my head around all of it honestly, let alone effectively talked about it, but being it in a community of people who might understand how I feel is definitely comforting. I just want to thank you all for all the love and support you provide each other and newbies like me everyday. It's a ray of light in a dark situation, so thank you all I look forward to meeting you and finding some resolu
  19. Hello All! My name is Lilith (that is what I call myself inside my head) I am married to a wonderful guy (super supportive and totally lost on how to help me). I used to paint and make jewelry and crafts were my thing. Then I started to remember.... and I shut down ( I didn't even want to hug my husband for almost a year... did I mention he is awesome? He understood.) One day at work someone brought me some melt and pour soap they had made. It was awesome. It was orange and smelled wonderful. ... It hit me like a truck.... I can make this.... I NEED to make this.... I poured myself into soap
  20. Hey, I'm new here, so I don't exactly know how to do this or what to say. I honestly doubt very many people will read this. But it makes me feel better typing this. I was raped when I was child, various times on many accounts. My rapist, my brother, should have known better. But truth is, I know he knew better. I'm 16 now, and he's in his 20s. Nothing's happened, and almost nobody knows, and now I'm trying to get better. I know I can do it. If anyone has any advice, please, I'm open ears. I need all I can get.
  21. I told my best friend about what happened to me. It was hard, and at first I am not completely sure if she believed me or not. But after the words came out of my mouth, "I was raped by my brother," she at first was shocked. Then she hugged me, and told me that it would be okay. I felt like there was this weight lifted off my shoulders and it feels good. I urge anyone who is in the same position as me, or knows somebody who is. Tell somebody, even if it is a friend. It will help, I promise. I feel like I am one step closer to becoming myself again, like I can carry the weight of what happened a
  22. Hi this is my first post and my first time being a member of a support group for survivors. I am a 21 year old Christian and am partially disabled. I was assaulted years ago, when I was in middle school. I kept it a secret until I was an adult and now I'm trying to move on and have a normal life. Hoping to find some inspiration.
  23. Hello, I've never done this way to meet other survivors before, so I apologies if I post anything triggering or insulting. I dont want to hurt anyone in any possible way. Quick recap of myself.. In the past 5 years, my life has shattered Due to the fact that ive been sexually assulted 5 times, raped 3 times, sexually and emotionally abused 2 times, and sexually harassed by 1. ( all in the past 5 years ) I was then diagnosed with anxiety, PTSD, and eating disorder. Ive seeked help from multiple doctors and therapists, sadly though ive also experienced not so helping professional help, but hav
  24. I guess, this is an introduction of sorts. I've been battling the backlash of the past and feel like it's time to actually reach out to anyone who can understand these feelings. I have no idea where to even begin anymore. There are weeks, months even that I feel fine and that I've overcome and all is well. Suddenly, I feel as though I'm back at square one. Here's to hoping I find some clarity.
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