I felt an awful lot like you describe right after my rape. It lasted for a while. I think I thought that if I could see triggering things or things that should be triggering, and finally DIDN'T react, that I would be healed. I really wanted verification about being ok, because I desperately wanted to be ok but never felt ok. I also never got the reaction I was looking for in people. I was guarded in who I told, and was really annoyed that nobody offered the response that would make me say, "Ah, finally, some clarity! Now I understand! Now I'm ok. Now I'm healed and can move on." I know I praye