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bernadettekennedy

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    19

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    ireland

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  • MembershipType
    Survivor

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  1. bernadettekennedy

    I lost my mum I december and now my dad has been given only a week to live they both were my rocks when I was raped , now I have no one left no support left I told a close friend what happenef to me last year and sh now dosent speak to me anymore she stood up in the local pub and told everyone what happened to me step by step so i know i cant trust anybody anymore my only support in my mum and dad are gone . so what do i do now I dont want to be alone I cant be I wont make it

  2. bernadettekennedy
    update ...... my friend has not spoken to me since no matter that i have tried so many times, i dont understand it she has known me for thirty years, and she just dosent want to know me anymore is it so discusting to her that i was raped, am i not good enough to be friends with just because of being violated, i really dont know whats wrong i am not a horrible evil person i just had horrible evil things happen to me, why cant she just give me a hug like she used to
  3. bernadettekennedy
    i hear you, i hope you are ok,
  4. bernadettekennedy
    Thank you all for your support
  5. bernadettekennedy
    Thank you all it is such a relief to know i am not alone thank you all for your support, my story is a horrible one, i was raped in the bathroom of a disco by a guy and his friend, my screams didnt help me my kicks thumps didnt either but me against two horrible vile men, what could i do i have never been hurt so much in my life to make it worse i will always have a reminder of that night, my precious little girl was born because of one of those men dont get me wrong i love her with all my heart she is my world i know i would have taken my own life because of my rape only for her, i will never
  6. bernadettekennedy
    I really hope i can seperate my being raped from the birth of my little girl,just somedays when she is angry or in a stroppy mood or when i am feeling very low i can see him in her, i truely do love her with all my heart and soul but it kills me to see him in herchange of direction here i was not in a relationship with him i was out in a disco with sum friends for my birthdayand made the mistake of going to the bathroom alone thats where it happened him and his buddy had great fun 1 attacked me while the other guarded the door,sorry i cant keep going i need to stop sorry :-( it hurts too much
  7. bernadettekennedy

    feeling very low today guys any advice on how i can escape the feeling of being totally humiliated about my so called friends standing up in the middle of the pub announcing that i was raped :(

    1. bernadettekennedy

      bernadettekennedy

      I wasnt there i just got messages on facebook to tell me, so now people know!! I never wanted anyone to know i feel as if it is all my fault i deserved it, now all my friends know what happened to me why would my friend do that what do i do now ?? :-(

    2. chant2012

      chant2012

      How could this be your fault? You had no control over the r*pe happening and you definitely had no control over what your friends did. You weren't even there! I am so sorry that they did this... How awful. Sitting with you. ♥

    3. somerandomguy1985

      somerandomguy1985

      A lot of people think they know what's best for you after you've been through abuse, but in reality they don't know what the hell they are doing. I've been hurt through similar situations. I'm sorry that they didn't take your feelings into consideration when they did this. Let them know that this isn't alright and that you don't appreciate this.

  8. bernadettekennedy
    I told her every detail of my rape, my daughter born out of it and i trusted her and she abandoned me maybe i will eventually come to terms with all of it but losing her set me back and thank you for your compassion i hope your friend came back to u
  9. bernadettekennedy
    Thanks for replying its nice for someone to take an interest, dont get me wrong i do love my little girl she is 10 now, and after all that time it dosent get any easier, it will always be hard i know that i just dont know why god could do this to me i have always been a good person,one thing i no is that she will never know about it ever, day to day life is hard it never leaves my mind but i am always there for her and i always will be well until i cant do it anymore
  10. bernadettekennedy
    Omg you poor lady i really dont understand why they can do this to us, god hasnt helped me my little girl wasnt born on the anniversaryof my rape but she was born because of it,god has forgotten about me too
  11. bernadettekennedy

    New

    bernadettekennedy posted a blog entry in bernie's Blog

    the anniversary was a month ago, i decided after 9 years to explain it to my best friend what happened to me, i always tought it was my fault but she encouraged me that it was not and to seek help, which i did. again. but since than she wont speak to me, the last thing she said was i need time i dont know how to help u, i told her she did help me but she dosent understand that. did i hurt her by telling her what happened, i don't know i wish i didnt tell her at all because she would still be here, i know i have got off track a bit but, i need her she was my person now i may aswell be dead to
  12. bernadettekennedy
    i am new here, i need to know that i am not alone, i feel so sad right now,how can i get what happened out of my mind, any ideas guys ?? please
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