aside from all that, i enjoy music, singing, drawing, and dancing

over a decade ago, I ventures onto similar survivors forums under this name to tackle my then emerging memories of paternal incest. 

Back then I was able to recover and process a few memories and lived in blissful ignorance for another decade that that’s all that there was to it.

Unfortunately, I was very wrong. There were other people involved and it was sophisticated organized. I developed neurological disorder after those memories appeared in my 30s and after a few years in pain, full blown dissociative identity disorder. This forced me to reconsider the memories that I have been dismissing for the past 5 years. So now I am here to face the final truth. 

I cannot work anymore, I became a stay at home housewife, basically the past is now my job, healing from it. 

I felt it was too hard and suddenly a very difficult personal issue came into my life and I just felt I had no energy or time to heal as I wanted to.

Right now, I feel broken.

That personal issue caused me more anxiety than I could have ever imagined and brought back the feeling of solitude and abandonment from when I was abused.

I am trying to leave it behind yet I feel so powerless.

Any words of encouragement or virtual hug would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

SakuraHikari 

I´m 24 and live in Ecuador, English is not my first language so I hope I don´t make too many mistakes and you can understand me. 

Multiple therapists have dismissed my feelings and trauma so I started talking to an AI that gave a link to this site. I hope to find support for what I went through here, even though I still dont believe what happended to me and my feelings toward it are valid. 

I looove Harry Potter, dancing (specially salsa and bachata), reading and painting. Im happy to be here. 

My names Mel, 

I was sa'ed by m grandfather as a child

and again by my mothers boyfriend when i was 15. 

im just trying to feel something besides his hands. 

I don’t really know what to ask or hope for. I’ve been involved with mental health issues, beginning with basic anxiety, 30+ yrs ago.

Current day, many medications & a few diagnosis’s later, and I’ve been off work for almost 6yrs. Worst time of my life until I got SS last yr. But, that gave me the time to do a lot of thinking. The past year or two, I feel like I’m finally making some progress, but too where, I don’t know yet 😝but I’m understanding myself more. 

Thanks in advance for everyone’s support!!

As for my interests, I like anime and manga, and I also like to read books and play visual novels. I really enjoy analyzing fictional characters that have gone through abuse and writing about them, as I often relate. I hope to one day share more details about my situation, but for now, I’m glad to have found this place. Nice to meet you all! 

I am a 40 years old female from Europe. My way let me here on my search for contact to other survivors.

Not really sure what else to say... I spend most of my time alone, because I kinda developed quite some anxiety around people. As a hobby, I like crafting and calligraphy.

I hope this is okay for an introduction. Thank you for taking the time to read this. 

I will share a bit about me, I am a nursing student and deal with multiple chronic illnesses. I have a medical alert service dog golden retriever, and she’s the best. I really like all things Disney, and I have a crochet business where I make crochet stuffed animals and sell at local markets. I have an adopted younger sister who has extensive issues, so my parents are emotionally unavailable for me. My current hyper fixations are The Hunger Games and any sea creatures, especially whales (blue whales). 
 

Glad I am here

I am in a small town in Idaho, and my therapist recommended that I try to find forums and online communities because I have been more open to the idea lately. I am female, 30 years old, married, and a lifelong introvert trying to be a little more social. I don't know how much I'll post at first, but I am going to try to be active at least once a month or more. 

Not really sure what else to say

Im a 21 year old female, currently in uni, im not sure how to introduce myself tbh, my experience of SA is very recent and I just didn't want to be alone so yeah....

Fast forward to August and I was feeling somewhat better, the flashbacks are easier to handle. I’m standing on the sidewalk in broad daylight when a man stops in front of me to compliment my earrings. Then he touched my ears. I hate being touched by strangers and have issues being touched. Then he goes on to the gross stuff. How other guys would be glad to do the same thing. He touched me three times before I got away. Having been a guy previously it took female friends to let me know that he assaulted me. And he undid all the work I had done.

Today I’m trying. I’m usually open about things and I want to be open about this but I need my family to know first. I’ve talked to my sisters but sadly they’re survivors as well so they were understanding. This leaves two male family members and I’ve only told one man, my therapist and he’s gay. I do have one female friend to talk to who became a survivor last summer. I told her my story after she told me what happened. I let her know I totally understood. 

I’m processing this as a feminine person even though the first time happened to a guy. I’m learning that I’m really not safe from men. This really is unpleasant since they’re interested in me now. 

Have a good day everyone! Nice to meet you. 

I experienced sexual abuse when I was around 4–5 years old. I don’t remember it in a clear, linear way, but rather through fragments, bodily sensations, and very blurred images that, when they are triggered, unleash a kind of inner storm. In those moments it feels as if I am back there again: I feel like a very small child who just wants to hide, to disappear.

Right now I fluctuate a lot. There are moments when I try to deny or minimize what happened, throwing myself into activities or trying to “function,” and others when I feel completely stuck, empty, overwhelmed by shame, anger, and fear. Sometimes I experience an intense and difficult-to-manage anger that scares me.

I am working on these issues in therapy, very cautiously. I’m writing here because I feel very alone in this process. Maybe I’m looking for stories from people who have gone through something similar, or simply to feel less out of place in what I’m experiencing.

Sorry for the long, disorganized, and perhaps dramatic message. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read it! 

I hope you remember me. It's been more than a year since I was here last time. I've missed you guys. I've had positive experience with this site, and there are so many kind people here. So much has happened in my life since then but I'll tell you about it later. I dont know what else to say right now

Hi again to everyone!