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Friends And Leaders



I'm Skye, one of Copper's Insiders. I know the rules, and do my best to follow them. On to the blog.

I'm confused and a little bit in shock.

This was another long-ass day for us. We walked out our front door at 8:45 this morning, and didn't walk back in until 5 PM. That's quite a while, especially when you add in the fact that most of this time was spent at our House of Worship.

I don't...that place is too weird for me usually. I understand the teachings, I understand the logic that runs them. I could listen to the music team for hours at a time. Even so, I tend to take a back seat when we're there. I'll listen but not speak up unless I have to.

What I don't understand is the people.

A friend honked and waved as we walked past her car. She yelled our name. We waved back, smiled. Inside, more greetings, smiles. Hugs. Copper relaxed into the friendly chaos as easily as breath. Smiled, greeted. Hugged. As a general rule, we don't like to be touched. But watching Copper at church today, you'd never know it. Barring a few flinches, she was at home in the sanctuary.

The past several weeks, our sense of Self has been wobbly. I'm not sure who went to our House of Worship in that period. I did it once, one of the kids was in and out...it was Insider Roulette at its finest. In all this time, Pastor has greeted us, but not physically reached out.

He interacted with a little one, speaking gently as one would a frightened child. He has consistantly moved slowly and gently. Many times during our volunteer evenings I've seen him speaking to one person, while keeping one eye in our direction. Last week he sat at our table, told jokes about how we all speak with accents. (Yes, I'll admit it. We all pronounce the Show Me State as Missou-rah, rather than Missour-ee.) But he never once called us by name, and he did not try to touch.

Pastor is on the extreme short list of those who can touch Copper at will. But he has proved that he can tell us apart. So for more than a month, Pastor has watched us, and spoken with care.

Today, Copper breezed into the building as if she owned it. Smiling, bantering, reaching out...she was in rare form.

And Pastor did a double-take and said "Hey, Miss Copper!" and gave her a hug.

Walking toward our seat, Copper looked at me and asked "Skye? What the hell just happened???"

I'm not sure, but it kept happening. Through lunch and an amazing workshop, people kept reaching out. Woods (who was one of the first people to befriend us at the House of Worship) brought a bag of clothes she found on sale. Later, she and Bessie invited me to lunch, and Bessie even picked up my tab.

I'm confused by this. I'm not used to people liking me. Us. Whatever.

I don't know what this is, or how we got here, but I think I like it.

You know, all this time I've considered myself a leader in this System. But watching my little sister in action, I can see I've got a lot to learn. I don't know how to make friends. She does. I saw it living in the shelter, and I see it now at our House of Worship.

I've got charisma oozing out of my pores...but Copper knows how to be a leader. I have to think about how to work a crowd.

She doesn't.

It's kind of nice to know that we've got someone on hand that doesn't think about leading. She just is a leader.

Come to think of it, I'm perfectly content to sing backup.


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Skye, this sounds like a great breakthrough for you. By the way, I'd prefer back up singing, too. I like to stay in the background. This blog post is a feel-good one. You all have your own strengths and talents. I don't know how to make friends, either. You're not alone in that! :)


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I am so glad that Copper has found the ability to meet some friends. I know how hard it is to meet people and consider them my friend. Its hard work. I also stay in the background a lot but I have been working on it and sometimes I do meet people that I hope we will become friends.

I am so glad that Copper is being accepted in church and the parishioners sound like they are all a nice bunch of people. Heaven knows that Copper needs friends to talk too not just Aqua and Teacher and not just about her problems and all the hard work the Insiders are doing with the deprogramming.

I send you all the best Skye and hopefully this is a great turnaround for Copper and all the Insiders.


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Thank you, Alas. I'm really in shock over not only that she's making friends, but the kind of friends. We've got friends walking the road she and I both dream of. People who love our art, our music, our speaking. Who love us.

I'm in shock...but I'm happy.

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