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Struggling through depression with my new diagnosis of BPD

sk8er

Entry posted by sk8er in Upset ·

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Hello everyone. I guess It's been a minute but I hope everyone's doing okay.

I really want to say I'm doing well but, I've recently felt like I've fallen In a wave of sadness, and It hasn't been an easy one compared to some depression episodes I've had In the past.

I recently got diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (also known as BPD), because of my prolonged depression over the years (that has been on and off) and a few other symptoms including my inability to remain In a stable romantic relationship. Was I super surprised with my diagnosis? not really...In fact, I feel like It took them too long to get me diagnosed for real this time.

It made me feel validated In a way, but also a bit sad that It took too long to get my diagnosis, considering how long I've been on medication without a proper reason other than "prolonged depression".

I know this Isn't like a "fatal diagnosis" In general, and there's treatments and therapy that can help, but sometimes when I get these mood swings or episodes I feel so hopeless. This time It hit me like a train...I hadn't experienced such a deep depression In a really long time, ever since I was a teenager...It made me feel like I was going backwards In all the progress I've made over the years.

Part of me remains a bit hopeful however, and whenever I can get out of bed I make the most of It. I take my meds, I eat something, I shower. I appriciate those little bursts of energy that I rarely get to take care of my self. Then I go back to bed...

I keep fighting because I really want my life back, the life I used to have. And I know none of my dreams can be done laying In bed.

Anyways that's my update. I might make another update about some other things I'm struggling with also which have to do with some personal beliefs, but that's a whole different topic.

For now, I'm happy with what I wrote.

Lots of love everyone, keep fighting...

9 Comments

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awi

Welcome back friend.  Thank you for the update.  I am glad they found a right DX.  Sometimes it takes a while.  Actually finding a diagnoses that is correct may feel like a relief and also this didn't suddenly happen.  Like you have had this maybe always and the DX just validates you.  It is not a life sentence and you will learn to get better tools the right ones to keep navigating life in the best way possible.  Feeling down is something all humans have felt from time to time.  When it is long lasting we need some extra tools and help to move forward.  I keep a diary of tasks and sometimes try to do small chores not giant mountains.  Telling others how we feel often brings some sort of relief.  How ever long or short lasting it may be little by little each step at a time and knowing others stand by you and will be there for you no matter what.   I think it is always important to be the boss of our medical team. Find a solid group to support us hiring the right people and those are the ones we choose. 

I am proud of you.  Check your thyroid hormones just in case, sometimes things come by twos and if one can be helped with a supplement or life change that is always good 

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awi

how are you keeping friend.  Sending lots of gentle thoughts keeping you company during this part of your journey

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sk8er

Hello friend ! @awi I'm not sure why but I thought I had previously written a response and I just didn't send It maybe? lol ! my bad. But thank you so much for your advice and taking the time to write back, I really appriciate It. 

On 7/25/2026 at 11:49 AM, awi said:

I keep a diary of tasks and sometimes try to do small chores not giant mountains.

I try to do the same with the tasks, just make one at a time, something small and realistic...adding too many makes me feel overwhelmed so I keep It short.

 

On 7/25/2026 at 11:49 AM, awi said:

I am proud of you.  Check your thyroid hormones just in case, sometimes things come by twos and if one can be helped with a supplement or life change that is always good 

Thanks friend! I have previously checked my thyroid many times due to some suspicitons I've had In the past that It may be hormonal but fortunetly I never had any Issues with that. My mother has a history of depression so It could be genetic, and recently I was battling with a mild case of PCOS which has been properly handled by taking supplements and doing exercise. 

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sk8er
On 8/16/2026 at 1:45 PM, awi said:

how are you keeping friend.  Sending lots of gentle thoughts keeping you company during this part of your journey

I thankfully got out of that major depressive episode and now It's super managable and mild compared to how I was a month ago.

I do still have depression but I can still be functional with my tasks ans school so that makes my life a lot easier.

I'm currently looking Into different types of therapy (like maybe getting Into CBT) to help with my depression and prevent It from going back to how It was a month ago, though nothing can be sure. But I have hope still.

I hope you're doing well as well, see you!

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awi
7 hours ago, sk8er said:

I thankfully got out of that major depressive episode and now It's super managable and mild compared to how I was a month ago.

I do still have depression but I can still be functional with my tasks ans school so that makes my life a lot easier.

I'm currently looking Into different types of therapy (like maybe getting Into CBT) to help with my depression and prevent It from going back to how It was a month ago, though nothing can be sure. But I have hope still.

I hope you're doing well as well, see you!

Hi friend so glad to hear from you and know the depression is less. I seem very cheerful most of the time and even when I have the blues.  The therapy sounds interesting I have heard of it but never had any experience. 

I just got a tooth pulled today.  Finally I was waiting for ever to get it done. Off antibiotics at last and hope to be on the mend.  

It is so great you are studying.  An investment in you always is good. 

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sk8er
2 hours ago, awi said:

Hi friend so glad to hear from you and know the depression is less. I seem very cheerful most of the time and even when I have the blues.  The therapy sounds interesting I have heard of it but never had any experience. 

I just got a tooth pulled today.  Finally I was waiting for ever to get it done. Off antibiotics at last and hope to be on the mend.  

It is so great you are studying.  An investment in you always is good. 

Aw I hope you feel better soon, I know teeth stuff can be painful, but sometimes necessary.

And yes, I'm almost done with school, I graduate In december finally.

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awi
15 hours ago, sk8er said:

Aw I hope you feel better soon, I know teeth stuff can be painful, but sometimes necessary.

And yes, I'm almost done with school, I graduate In december finally.

Thank you fiend. Hey it is great you are just about to finish. So proud of you 

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sk8er
10 hours ago, awi said:

Thank you fiend. Hey it is great you are just about to finish. So proud of you 

Thank you! I’m proud of myself as well. Lots of effort and work hehe

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awi
20 hours ago, sk8er said:

Thank you! I’m proud of myself as well. Lots of effort and work hehe

:hifive:

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