Letter To My Father
Weekend dates
And movie nights.
Infinite stars in the skies.
Coke and french fries.
Once again, you're asleep,
I'm awake and count the sheep.
It's all you ever seemed to do,
Even when I had the flu.
But there's a secret side to you,
One that's not at all new.
Apparently everyone knew,
For me it's an entirely new view.
One of violence, of control,
You wouldn't even let me take a stroll.
You controlled what I wore,
Wouldn't let me leave the door.
Said my dreams were ridiculous,
Even though they were miraculous.
I don't understand how could you
Be the hero I once knew.
The little girl in me bleeds for you,
Even after everything you put me through.
Since even if you raised your hand,
You will always be my dad.
You're the reason I'm alive,
But my biggest goal is to survive.
You didn't make it very easy.
Your presence makes me rather uneasy.
Infinite dark secrets from the past,
Now they come to light at last.
I loved you for the longest time,
Wish I could tell you it's peace time.
Now I'd like to inquire:
What is it you desire?
I am your greatest sin and crime,
But who cares what happened in wartime?
Even if you refuse to see,
I am your legacy.
I would like to ask you your reasons,
But I don't dare to see you in these seasons.
I want to know who showed you your view,
Because monkey do
What monkey see,
Even if I disagree.
You had your responsibilities:
To provide facilities free of hostilities,
To raise me free of toxicity,
To provide the bare basicity.
Now the sun has set again.
I'm here writing in fountain pen.
Wish I'd dare to take action,
Reach out to you, see your reaction.
It's been years since I've seen your countenance,
Sometimes I miss your sentiments.
I know I'm a disappointment,
Though I didn't deserve your treatment.
You are a monkey and so am I.
A piece of you is forever inside.
Another day has set, another will rise.
Everyday a piece of me dies.
Goodbye father,
Have my life.
It's the only thing you could want back.
While after you, I'll inherit a panic attack.
-LénaCs
Edited by LenaCs
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