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Lost Another Friend


Celia

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I lost another friend,

Here I go again.

Guess what, it isn't new,

I blame myself again.

 

I'm at fault for the disaster,

I'm at fault for losing my friend.

He was like a brother to me,

But admittedly, a jerk.. something.

 

He would be nice to me,

Treat me like his sister.

But sometimes then he jokes around,

Acts inappropriate and acts sinister.

 

But everytime I'd confront,

He'd laugh and tell me to chill.

He'd say I'm being overdramatic,

And they were just harmless jokes (to him).

 

Now it's finally over,

Got in a BIG fight.

I said I was done,

But then apologized. 

 

I wanted my brother back,

The friend and family I knew.

Not the jerk who is cruel,

And didn't admit when he was rude.

 

Then he comes back saying,

"I wish you a happy life.

But unfortunatelly,

This is the end of our friendship line."

 

I can't believe him,

This pisses me off.

He does shit to me,

Then just blows me off.

 

Says it's not a big deal,

And often times, says he doesn't remember.

Says, "are you crazy?!  I would never do that!"

Then suddenly makes me the lunatic.

 

He does this to me every single time,

And every single time, I go out of my mind.

I'm polite and sometimes, I'd let it slide.

But when I started confronting him, he lies.

 

I'm starting to think maybe losing him was good,

But he was like a brother to me, part of my familyhood.

I knew his brother and his sister,

They were family to me.

 

But now he's gone,

And I lost part of my family...

The only ones who understood.

 

Which brings me to why I cut,

Explaining my status.

I cut 12 times,

It's a habit.

 

As some of you know,

It's punishment for me.

I deserve it the most,

So more blood I'll see.

Edited by Celia

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