I've done some things,

Hard to explain.

All the complications,

All the frustrations.  

 

I was in the right,

I did the right thing.  

But my head is stubborn,

Not very accepting. 

 

Now all the confusion,

My head is hurting.  

I want to cut and cry,

But I can't do any harming. 

 

I'm stuck on these words,

Of all the people around me.

Different opinions,

I don't know what to think now.

 

Getting me stuck, 

Even more confused.

I can't break the promise,

Or another friend, I will lose.

 

Mom telling me to find a way to cope,

But I only know one way to do so.

That way was exterminated, now here I lie,

Crying and shaking in my bed at night.

 

Hard to accept all of these lies,

But the truth, seems so right.

I need to accept, don't see why,

My mind says punishment is the way to pay for crime. 

 

In this case,

I'm at blame.

Fault of the crime,

For a long life time. 

 

So I'll pay,

I know I'll find a way.

Loophole around the system,

Make things look like an accident.

 

Maybe it'll be a mistake,

But I don't know what say.

All I can do is cry, no longer harm,

I don't see any other way.

 

Any other is way,

Makes me feel as a fool.

I know I can't trick my mind,

I'm done with this duel.