Gratefully, I'm lucky.  I'll thank my professional friend for assisting me out of what was supposed to be a temporary move into an actual home.  There's a door open with no strings attached other than providing my new roommate some of my 'dog whisperer' calming techniques for a rescue dog while he is working long hours.  And... my overall healing.  I'm supposed to focus on getting quality sleep in my own bed that has a door.  For somebody with RA like me, the couch in a cramped apartment with my current Asperger roommate hasn't entirely benefitted me.  It's been a quasi-hateful battleground for years digressing into language being hurled back and forth.  So when I leave he can call me a filthy Jew behind my back.  I'm simply NOT giving two shits about his level of unmedicated crazy.  I don't have to.

STEPS FORWARD:  It's a big place.  There is almost an identical set up in the back yard that reminds me of much, much better days.  Any PTSD'er will remark about memories but this has got to be a personal Hollywood moment just of my very own.   I'll have greenery to whack away at as well as dirt to dig in and add to the 'ambiance' of a bachelor pad.  His mother is... she's actually thrilled I'm moving in.  WHOA!  I just about fell out over that warm welcome.  But hey, I'm just glad she raised a gentleman son with all of those qualities I never sought out.  THANKS MOM!

It's not all tragic and terrible being broke and disabled but still cognitively functioning.  I love my really cheap Rx that completely stopped the panic attacks in their tracks.  I love my MALE Mds --- 'cause the female MDs I saw for decades were actually a part of the problem.  While that might seem strange, I'm not at all going to enter that level of "cray cray" with professional drug abuse and career competition.  I'm dealing with my own version of minor "cray cray" post 2008 economic crash --- losing everything followed by intimate family deaths.

Positive stress is knowing that although there are "unknowns" in a new environment, leaving one that has asphyxia due to horrific oven 'hygiene' will eventually produce a laugh over time.  The list of OMG I will never miss the male roommate parading around naked in front of the mirror while I'm sleeping fully clothed at night... yeah.  That shit is crazy.  I will NEVER miss it.  Ever.

I've had the opportunity to talk to wonderful people on the phone about moving services.  There has been an exchange of laughter as I always try to keep things on the lighter side of right.   Most of all, I have to trust people I do not know to help make this transition as smooth as possible.  Maybe I'll make a new long-distance friend or two in the process.

Anyway, I'll keep 'fighting the good fight' with a semi-smile on my face.

And a full wine glass.

Have an awesome rest of your week, folks.

Thanks!