so I  have been going to the therapist for 4 weeks now, we talked yesterday about working on recovering my lost memories. She thinks that I do have CPTSD but she said that there something else going on beside that. She didn't elaborate on that but I have to work on self care first though.  Apparently treating myself as little more then an animal is not heathy.

   I will admit it a little disconcerting to have both my wife and my therapist saying that it surprising I am not a serial killer. That bothers me a little. 

   APS in my home state isn't going to do anything about my brother emotionally abusing my mother. They promised multiple time over the past month to go to the home and speak with her about it. They have yet to do so. No wonder the receptionist laughed when I told her I was calling APS about the landline. She knew APS there is a joke.  I cant even get a call back from the caseworker. And people wonder why I dont trust the Government. 

   I starting the classes for counseling , between the dyslexia and the childhood abuse about it I having a hard time with the essays. I feel they have to be prefect and I struggle with that.  I going to try to apply something I decided about work and hobbies  along time agoto it. Some Times good enough is. I am just aiming for competence not perfection.

" Perfect is the enemy of good" Voltare