I finally got a job. I had been applying pretty much everywhere, everyday, since June. Applying for jobs basically became my job, only it only lead to constant disappointment and I didn't get paid. 

I even got a job at one my favorite fast food places. So now I get half priced food of pretty much my favorite food. This all sounds great, in theory, but there's a huge problem with my job that I'm not sure I'm going to be able to handle. 

I applied to every location, except one, for a very specific reason. I interviewed at the location closest to my house and actually a few others that were a bit farther away. At the end of last week, my boss tells me he hires for 2 locations. The one I work at, and one about 10 minutes away. He wanted me to transfer locations. He promised me more hours and 8 dollars an hour instead of 7.75. At first, it all sounded like a pretty sweet deal. 

However, I apparently have the world's shittiest luck. Because every good thing that happens to me has to also be coated in it's own layer of shit. 

My new work location is a block away from where I was raped. It's literally right there. And the guy who did it, still lives in that house, with his mother and my half sister. The one location I specifically don't apply to work at, is the one location I have to work at. 

I start there today. My boss texted me to go there 2 hours ago and I've pretty much been pretending I didn't see it. I don't want to go. I just know that working there is going to destroy my mental health. I'm going to be a wreck. I'm terrified. 

I was actually feeling better recently. I've been working on being a more positive person and all that shit. I've been talking about my issues more. I finally got the chance to go to therapy (haven't gone yet...but I'm going to). I got all my paperwork cleared up for college. Life should have been looking up for me, for once. 

Hopefully I'll be okay. I think maybe once I work there for a bit and realize I'm not really in danger, I'll be okay. But just being near that place is enough to drive me insane. I can't pass the place on the highway without feeling like I'm going to be sick. I just feel stupid. It's just a location. Just another house. 

Why does it bother me so much?