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Welcome to After Silence - A message board and chat room for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors.

Welcome to After Silence, a message board and chat room designed to help survivors communicate in the recovery of rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, and all types of sexual violence.

After Silence has over 30 different forums, ranging from topics created to discuss specific areas of healing and recovery from rape and sexual violence, as well as forums open to general discussions and lighter topics. Because we value the privacy of our members, most of our forums are private, which means that ONLY REGISTERED members have access to them. Please register for a free account to gain full access to the After Silence Online Support Group.

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us at aftersilence.moderators@gmail.com
Guest Message by DevFuse


Hello, I Am New To The Support Group

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10 replies to this topic

#1 Flowergarden

  • New Member
  • 2 posts

Posted 02 March 2013 - 10:57 PM

Hello Everyone,


I am 29 years old. I was raped and lost my virginity when I was 26. Just 2 months prior to the rape incident, I moved to the area (where he raped me) to begin my PhD program. I was far from my family and friends and I was in the process of making new friends. I was a bit lonely during that time.


Not only did he rape me but he said racist, extremely vulgar, violent, and demeaning things. It was both a physical and mental assault. As he raped me he yelled "I hate you! You are so weak!"


Unfortunately, I was in a state of disbelief and could not communicate coherently, make sound decisions, or think clearly afterwards. I was also in excruciating physical pain due to two sexually transmitted diseases that he gave me. I did not report him. During that time, I just wanted to make the pain stop. I attempted suicide two weeks after the incident. After almost 3 years of therapy, 2 separate occassions of being committed in a mental health hospital, retreats, prayer, and dealing with illness, I finally admitted to myself that I was raped. If you are reading this and you were raped, I am extremely sorry that we live on a planet where living beings do such things to each other. 


- S

Edited by Flowergarden, 02 March 2013 - 10:59 PM.

#2 crayonboxfamily

  • Member
  • 12 posts

Posted 02 March 2013 - 11:18 PM

Welcome to the group S,

I am sorry for why you are here. I am new also and I hope this is a place of healing for you.

#3 Flowergarden

  • New Member
  • 2 posts

Posted 02 March 2013 - 11:29 PM

Thank you and welcome. This is my first online support group. I am so grateful for this forum.

#4 crayonboxfamily

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  • 12 posts

Posted 02 March 2013 - 11:34 PM

This is mine also. I haven't been to the chat room yet. I am making my way there slowly. I am wary but hopeful. It is easier to help other people but recieving help is not so easy :)

#5 Maley

  • Member
  • 260 posts

Posted 03 March 2013 - 02:42 AM

Hello to both of you! I am so very sorry for what happened to you and that you need to be here. I am glad you found this community! I came here in mid January after starting therapy several months ago  and started dealing with my past (CSA and rape at 19 yrs old) after many years of not dealing with it. I have found this community to be very caring and supportive and a very important part of the healing journey.  I hope you both find all the support you are deserve as you continue your healing!

Take gentle care!


#6 strawberrycookie

  • Member
  • 687 posts

Posted 03 March 2013 - 05:25 AM

Hi and welcome, to the both of you.


I hope you find everything you need here :) 

#7 Bubble23

  • Member
  • 11 posts

Posted 03 March 2013 - 03:19 PM

Hi there, I too am new and pretty nervous about this whole thing. Silly question but would someone be able to tell me how to enter the chat room, i seem to be going around in circles here :(


Thank you.

#8 runto1234

  • Member
  • 12 posts

Posted 03 March 2013 - 06:10 PM

Welcome! I hope this site helps you.

#9 Bubble23

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  • 11 posts

Posted 03 March 2013 - 06:36 PM

Thank you, I appreciate it.

#10 mariskafan822

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  • 10 posts

Posted 04 March 2013 - 03:57 AM

I am so sorry to hear what has happened to you. This site has really helped me and still continues too when I fall back on hard times and bad memories. I hope you find the same healing power here. If you ever need a friend to talk to, I am always free. :hug: :supportu:

#11 ~FOUND~


    Anna is found by God!!! Anna loves Jesus!

  • Member
  • 46,688 posts

Posted 08 March 2013 - 04:44 PM

Hi there.

Welcome to AS.

i hope you find this site to be helpful.

Very nice to meet you.