I felt an awful lot like you describe right after my rape. It lasted for a while. I think I thought that if I could see triggering things or things that should be triggering, and finally DIDN'T react, that I would be healed. I really wanted verification about being ok, because I desperately wanted to be ok but never felt ok.
I also never got the reaction I was looking for in people. I was guarded in who I told, and was really annoyed that nobody offered the response that would make me say, "Ah, finally, some clarity! Now I understand! Now I'm ok. Now I'm healed and can move on."
I know I prayed for the day that I would FORGET any of this had happened. I wondered if I'd ever forget. Initially, I had severely intruding thoughts, that seemed to be there, every day, all the time, and got in the way of me getting anything done, because nothing else could enter my head. The thoughts were 100% intrusive, and I found I had to fully IMMERSE myself in whatever it was that I was doing, to concentrate SUPER hard, and TRY to push the thoughts out. Sometimes the thoughts were so intrusive that I could not read a word. I distinctly remember I was in a hallway, and told to go to the hallway labeled NORTH. I entered. I saw 2 signs: one read NORTH, and the other read SOUTH. I could see the letters but I didn't know what the words meant and didn't know which way to go. So, I just waited and hoped to find someone I recognized, and follow which ever way they went.
It got WAAAAAAAAAAY better with time. LOTS of time. Nowadays I don't expect to ever forget, but the intrusive thoughts have gone. I guess I've accepted I'll have some triggers sometimes, but I tell myself I'm human, and 90% of the time, I'm really ok. But during those initial days, I was really NOT ok and NOT doing well, and it was about 100% or 99.9% of the time.
And I must say, I'm so glad you posted this, because this very issue has been bothering me, and just when I think I'm the only whose actively sought out a trigger, I realize, why I might have, and I realize that others have done the same thing. It's very healing to hear that others have experienced similar things.
I hope you find your answer. Things do get better with time. I know "better" isn't a definitive or measurable word. I used to want to know exactly to what degree or quantity would things get better, and HOW MUCH time would it take. I wanted an algorithm that said, "S.A. occures + X amount of time passes = 100% normal. There is no such equation. It all seems to happen on a bell curve with a lot of gray areas.
I wish you the best and hope you have some peace.