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From Victim To Survivor To Thriver

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71 replies to this topic

#61 xxloveisdeathxx



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Posted 19 April 2011 - 06:04 PM

thanks for this.

and I totally wish HP stood for Harry Potter. I'm not going to lie, that is the first thing that popped into my head. :D

#62 KBug36609

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Posted 24 April 2011 - 09:40 PM

Wish I could say I was in the survivor or thriver categories, but I guess that's what I'm here for. I'm learning and working on it every day!

#63 preciousandhonored

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Posted 08 May 2011 - 09:16 PM

Just saw this, thanks for posting!

#64 donnak426

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Posted 14 May 2011 - 09:17 PM

QUOTE (calliehere @ May 7 2010, 12:36 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Fraga...I'm not sure what HP means....maybe Healing Power? Not sure. I would be interested to know. Let me know if you find out.

Hi All. Thanks for the chart. It was a great learning tool for me. As far as I know, in 12 Step Programs "HP" usually means "Higher Power" or a kind, loving all, gentle "God of your understanding".

#65 TBear

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Posted 04 June 2011 - 10:55 PM

Wow - this is a good resource to help see where I am...

Mostly in the victim column.... Sometimes I waiver, and switch - depending on my mindset at the time....
Part of me might be more survivor...

So confusing - at least this adds some order to the confusion blink.gif


#66 shakti

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Posted 12 June 2011 - 10:22 PM

Thanks for the link! This is very useful. I fluctuate categories depending on the day, but primarily fall into victim, which was a little disappointing. I also have a habit of burying my anger and as a result have fallen into depression. My T made me aware of this pattern and suggested taking an antidepressant.

Thanks again for the link. I will continue to use it as I work through my messy past.

#67 sheepin31flavors

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Posted 13 June 2011 - 10:30 PM

That list is so patronizing and insulting.

Implying that people who are still victimized by their tragedies as doing something bad? Labeling people who wisely don't take the word of therapists as the word god and recognize them as the corrupt humans that they are as something negative? No surprise there; those assholes are out to line their pockets and what better way to do that than to shut down dissenting opposition like this?

Calling victims "hopeless"? "Damaged"?

And the worst one of the list -- implying that people who are angry at religion are doing something wrong and that the only way you can be considered a good and strong person is if you "have a personal relationship with the God of their understanding?" What about atheists or those that recognize the systemic social problems many religions (especially the Abrahamic ones) have caused humanity without history? Don't they count?

This is just a thousand levels of insane.

#68 buswiz89

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Posted 15 June 2011 - 12:22 AM

I'm just now finding this topic and I just wanted to say that I truly enjoyed this chart. I'm proud to say that I'm mostly a survivor with one or two victim marks; but I also had a couple thriver marks too.

For me, this was a great tool to look at and see where I need to be heading. I'm finding that therapy doesn't work for me very well (I never know what to say--and I'm afraid to let it all out for fear of judgment); therefore I'm doing my best trying to work things out on my own.

Thanks a lot for posting this =)

#69 phoenixgirl


    Trying...Trying to keep my head above water

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Posted 15 June 2011 - 05:09 AM

I have always wanted to open this thread, and never really had the guts. I think that the descriptions of what someone feels in each stage is really a helpful start. I know that I have felt "damaged" and "hopeless" so often. Sometimes I still do. Some of the suggested feelings are not ones that fit with me, but that is normal for any list...nothing can really incorporate the entire human condition. I look forward to tracking my progress. I would like to call myself a "thriver" one day. I used to be, or used to think I was, before all of these memories kept coming back.

#70 lola9

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Posted 04 August 2011 - 02:25 PM

such a good chart smile.gif but if im honnest right now im just completey in victim :/ mine depends on my mood alot too. Thanks for sharing

#71 blossums



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Posted 16 September 2011 - 08:16 AM

I just spent ages looking for this, for some reason I was convinced it was a sticky, and had completely mis-remembered which forum it is in

Looking at it today I am much less in the victim category and more spread between the other two

I really do like this table, have now copied it for myself so I'll not lose it

#72 calliehere

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Posted 09 July 2013 - 03:47 PM

Wow, it's really been a long time since I have looked at this chart. I can't believe how much over to the right I am in the Thriver column these days. When I originally posted the chart, the majority of me was in the Victim column. I still have some Survivor aspects I need to work on in order to be be considered Thriving in that category and I'm looking forward to checking back at some point.


I'm glad to read some of the comments in this thread.