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Welcome to After Silence - A message board and chat room for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors.

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Guest Message by DevFuse


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11 replies to this topic

#1 Guest_Abrolake_*

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Posted 08 June 2004 - 10:25 PM

Hello. This is still difficult for me. I'm a survivor of sexual abuse by my grandfather. The abuse lasted for eight years. I recently got out of the hospital, where I was treated for symptoms brought on by his legacy. I suppose I'm still afraid - of him (though he's no longer living), of what he did (though it ended twenty-seven years ago), and of what he did to me. I have, though, realized that I survived, and I am going to be well, eventually. I need something like this place. Someplace where people can understand the terror and the rage. To whoever developed this sight, may you be blessed ten-fold for each life you touched.

In the hospital, we were encouraged to express our thoughts and feelings through whatever medium we felt comfortable with. I've read through several of the posts and I believe each of you may understand what I've written. It feels to me to be a most appropriate introduction of myself. It's a piece of poetry entitled, "Little Rabbit." I don't mean to do anything more by it than get it out of me, to say hello, and thank you for being here.

Little Rabbit

Dark descent, away from light,
Cool, secure, safe darkness,
Flee fast, flee far, not to look back,
Leave no more than ripples in a puddle.

Dark, safe, cool depths,
No eyes may see me, no hands may reach,
Lest I reach for them, lest I allow,
Yet the descent continues to further depths.

Where is this place now, such darkness?,
Why can I not find my way back?,
Where are the hands to reach for me?,
What was safe is now alone.

Darkness envelops me here,
The light eludes me,
I fear as I climb back,
That the light has extinguished in my absence.

Climb, Rabbit, climb,
The darkness would consume you,
Run, Rabbit, run,
Lest no hands may reach you.

Turn left, turn right, listen,
Reach forward, flee fast,
For the light awaits your return,
The ripples have grown in your absence.

Flee fast, flee far, from the darkness,
Never forget the terror,
Reach out, grasp hold, hold tight,

Rabbit, dear rabbit,
You're safe in the light now,
Pray tell, dearest little rabbit,
What would you do with the light?

To go back with light, into the darkness,
To find those lost there, left there,
Those consumed already,
Those fleeing the light.

The ripples grow and multiply,
The waves curl with a roar,
Brave little rabbit,
Make haste, bring back more.

To each of you carrying light into the darkness, regardless of how small a flame you may imagine it be, may you be blessed. For you simply being here, I have hope that there is still light for me. Thank you.

#2 Guest_queenie_*

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Posted 08 June 2004 - 11:33 PM


Your poem is very moving and inspiring. I am so sorry for the abuse and pain you have suffered from the likes of your grandfather. You are safe now, he cannot hurt you any longer. You are extremely brave and courageous and that is very inspiring to me as well. Welcome to the family. We are all here to extend our love and support to you in any and every way we can. I look forward to getting to know you.

Sending you all of my Love

throb.gif throb.gif throb.gif

#3 Clarissa


    Little Dancing Butterfly

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Posted 08 June 2004 - 11:45 PM

welcome to After Silence! i am so glad you found your way here! Good for you for being able to post, cuz that's a huge first step! Your courage is definately evident, and thank you for sharing with us! I cant wait to get to know you! We are here for you! I pray that you find healing and support as i have.
Thank you so much for sharing your poem with us! You are such a talented writer! Wow! I'm pretty much at a loss for words! Thank you again for sharing that with us!
Welcome again. Hope to see you around!
love clarissa hug.gif

#4 betty


    spero melior

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Posted 09 June 2004 - 02:51 AM


welcome, i hope you find what you are looking for hug.gif
you're poem is beautiful


#5 aquapit


    ~Beauty is all around~

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Posted 09 June 2004 - 03:10 AM

hug.gif Welcome! Thank you for sharing your poem with us, it's wonderful! I'm sorry for the pain you have gone through... I'm glad you found us. I hope you find this place to be as wonderful and supportive as I have. You are not alone.

Take precious care of yourself. hug.gif

throb.gif Tracy

#6 Lindy


    Running Princess

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Posted 09 June 2004 - 05:53 AM


Welcome to After Silence. I'm sorry for the reasons that brought you here, however, I am glad you have found us.

Thank you for sharing your poem with us, it's beautiful. Feel free to post it in our poetry section smile.gif

Take gentle care,


#7 Survivors sanctuary

Survivors sanctuary

    We were beset by conflicts without and by fears within

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Posted 09 June 2004 - 07:42 AM

Welcome.....I hope that this place can help on your healing path, you have shown so much strenght already............the Poem was lovely ...... hug.gif

#8 Wendy



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Posted 09 June 2004 - 04:38 PM


Welcome to the forum. Thank you for sharing that soulful poem with us. You have a beautiful way with words. I'm sorry that you have been through so much hurt and that things have been so difficult for you and hope that you too continue to carry that light even in the darkest of times.


#9 -Nene-


    Intrepid Innocence

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Posted 09 June 2004 - 06:46 PM

((((Abrolake)))) hug.gif
The poem was beautiful. You sound like a lovely and talented person, welcome to AS. I hope you find the support in us that you're looking for.


#10 Alysure


    Specialized Catastrophe

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Posted 10 June 2004 - 03:09 AM


Thanks for posting that wonderful poem. You sound wonderful. I hope you can find some comfort here. I'm willing to help any way I can ok? :)

#11 phoenyx


    Native Spirit in the wind

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Posted 12 June 2004 - 01:51 PM

(((Abrolake))) Welcome to the group. I am sorry for all the pain you have endured. This a warm and supportive community. Know that you are not alone on your healing journey hug.gif Thank You for sharing your words with us. I look forward to more.

#12 your.beautiful.mistake



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Posted 12 June 2004 - 10:29 PM


Welcome to the group. I'm sorry you've experienced so much pain, but I'm glad you've found us. Take your time to look around. You're not alone on your journey...we're here for you all the time sweetie.

((safe hugs))