Welcome to After Silence - A message board and chat room for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors.
|Welcome to After Silence, a message board and chat room designed to help survivors communicate in the recovery of rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, and all types of sexual violence.
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Invalidation. Words Can Hurt!
Posted 06 June 2011 - 01:42 AM
"Well why did you even go over to his place?"
cause we broke up a week prior and he threatened to kill himself if I didn't come get my stuff out of his apartment...what would you have done?
After I got him expelled from his senior year of college...
"Have you thought about how you ruined his life? He was so close to student teaching and graduating"
Ummm...excuse you...HE chose to ruin his life...NOT me!
Posted 12 July 2011 - 08:52 PM
"Well you have to look at it this way. You CHOSE to go to Frankfurt that night. You had more control than you think."
Oh yes... I chose to travel to another city from Berlin, so that must mean I also chose to have sex with 4 strangers at once at 3 am in an empty parking lot. And I had so much control being one, 5 foot tall, 110 lb female against 4 male police officers. Ugh.
Posted 12 July 2011 - 09:35 PM
Posted 15 July 2011 - 10:27 PM
i made many friends who got it and had nice response to it and appreciate that. even some who said "dont use abuse as excuse not to get better", it didnt piss me, that's their opinion they have right to it, i dont emotionally depend on their response.
Edited by WayOut, 15 July 2011 - 10:28 PM.
Posted 16 July 2011 - 04:10 AM
Edited by SixImpossibleThings, 11 August 2011 - 02:01 PM.
Posted 16 July 2011 - 04:19 AM
Edited by SixImpossibleThings, 11 August 2011 - 02:02 PM.
Posted 19 July 2011 - 11:18 PM
Posted 20 July 2011 - 12:00 AM
and then, as if this genuinely explained everything, told me "I couldn't see you as being human".
I know it's not much compared to a lot of the previous replies from people in this thread, but I've spent the last year feeling inferior to everyone, like some ghost of a person, and every time I think about this response, it hurts more. I'm human. I'm human. Why can't I deserve the same decency as anybody else?
Edited by Tessa, 20 July 2011 - 12:10 AM.
Posted 20 July 2011 - 12:06 AM
When I feel like this, I try to remember and make myself believe the quote from Eleanor Roosevelt: "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."
Hang in there. I hear you.
Posted 02 August 2011 - 09:06 PM
How awful of this person to say something so mean and so very STUPID.
It really speaks of the type of person he is more than anything.