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Welcome to After Silence - A message board and chat room for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors.

Welcome to After Silence, a message board and chat room designed to help survivors communicate in the recovery of rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, and all types of sexual violence.

After Silence has over 30 different forums, ranging from topics created to discuss specific areas of healing and recovery from rape and sexual violence, as well as forums open to general discussions and lighter topics. Because we value the privacy of our members, most of our forums are private, which means that ONLY REGISTERED members have access to them. Please register for a free account to gain full access to the After Silence Online Support Group.

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us at aftersilence.org@gmail.com
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10 replies to this topic

#1 Vdud

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 01:12 PM

Fern tells me her account's been suspendid unfil febuary, she also tells me she got no notification, and as fern rightly stated i make more trouble than her, so what the poop's going on?

#2 -Nicole-

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 01:17 PM

Fern was sent an email about her suspension for not following board terms of service. If she did not receive it, I will be sure that another is sent to her.

#3 Vdud

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 01:37 PM

thanks so much for posting, when i was allowed to look at profiles i noticed her email address is one she doesn't use for MSN anymore, she changed it, but forgot to change it in her profile i assume, if you sent it to that one, then that is why she never got it, also what forum rules did she break? or is that private/personal *goes to terms of service to see if he can figure out what she did wrong*

thanks again nicole


here's a messege from fern, if she was suspended because of the age thing, then read on:

fern: I refuse to believe that, because im ONE year under the age restriction of this site, I should be suspended 'temperally' ... And denyed support. I cant believe the one place i felt like i belonged has now ditched me aswell. I give up on trying to accept help now, And i refuse to let people try to help me. Dave, that means you too ..and maddy ... etc .
come to me if you want support.. but i dont deserve help anymore.
why, even though im 14 in january .. i still have to wait till febuary to use the site .. is pointless to me. I never lied about my age and always told the truth. I was open with everyone about the fact that i am 13. ... a few have my email address.. if some of you do want to stay in touch,... selene, maddy, claire.. dave .. etc have my email addy. Thanks for all your support in the past.
but i feel totally unwelcome now.. so i doubt i will return in febuary. love you all x fern

Edited by Vdud, 17 December 2005 - 02:01 PM.


#4 -Nicole-

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 02:38 PM

As we have said before, we do not make exceptions to the rules. They are here for everyone's protection.

#5 Vdud

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 05:02 PM

well, i have to say, that's pretty god damned pathetic
and with that note, me thinks me leave AS

fern: I agree with dave. They say they'll never hurt you but they always lie.. you always get hurt in the end... what a suprise.. what i thought all along turned out to be true. Il miss AS but looks like they wont miss me. Thank you to. selene.. maddy.. claire .. michaelmac.. kitty... and anyone else who ever showed me support and gave me someone to talk to and care for. You all taught me alot. And i look up to. But i have now decided its best i leave. xx il be here for anyone at anytime.. if they feel they would like to get in contact x.. *love*
I always thought the day i left AS.. i would feel like i over came evrything that had ever happened.. and leave a better person. Its a shame i have to leave this site the way i have.

Dave: bye byeeee *waves to AS*
Fern: *tags maddy* - love ya hun

*Dave hears a big sigh of releif from AS as dave exits*

Edited by Vdud, 17 December 2005 - 05:15 PM.


#6 Vera

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 05:27 PM

QUOTE
why, even though im 14 in january .. i still have to wait till febuary to use the site .. is pointless to me.

As soon as fern turns 14 years old she is very welcome to come back, if she has permission from her parent or legal guardian. Before anyone can register, they AGREE to our Terms of Service, which clearly state:

QUOTE
By accepting this Agreement, you certify that:

You are at least 18 years of age and posses the legal authority to enter into an agreement and to use the Service in accordance with these Terms of Service.

OR

You are under 18 and have obtained PERMISSION from your parent or legal guardian to use the Internet to access this Web Sites, including those areas that contain adult material.

Do you think that we came up with this rule just for fun? Does anyone here realize what legal implications can arise from underage members using this board without permission from their parents/legal guardians? The kind of implication that could force After Silence to close down.

Now, if you do not know the law and what kind of implications can arise from allowing underage members to access a website with adult contents without parental consent, please DO NOT EVEN BOTHER TO REPLY.

I'm really sorry for Fern and my heart goes out to her, but we have to think of all of our 1000 and more members. WE CANNOT RISK having legal actions brought against us for the sake of one member.

Our guidelines also state:

QUOTE
1. This message board is for survivors fourteen (14) years of age and older.


We are not hiding anything. If there are 13 years old members (or under 13 years old) here, they better keep it to themselves. But if they publicly post about it or if we find out about it and don't do anything, we become LEGALLY responsible.

If you think that I'm making a big deal out of nothing, think again. A very popular message board for survivors similar to After Silence has been sued in the past and was forced to come up with even more restrictive terms of service than we have.

QUOTE
well, i have to say, that's pretty god damned pathetic
and with that note, me thinks me leave AS

And this is pretty god damned rude of you. You are free to leave. Goodbye.

I hope the majority of members here will believe us when we say that we NEVER make a decision with the intention of hurting a survivor. We are survivors, the last thing we want to do is hurt a fellow survivors. Unfortunately this world has laws and the internet has them too. We can't risk losing After Silence because one or two members lied about their age when they registered.

#7 phoenyx

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 06:23 PM

QUOTE
And this is pretty god damned rude of you. You are free to leave. Goodbye.


I so agree with you Vera. You and Nicole and all the other mods have the best interest and safety of all of us here and for that we thank you more than you may realize.
He was xtremely rude and totally not understanding or he just didnt care.

hug.gif
Lee

#8 teazle

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 07:26 PM

QUOTE(Vera @ Dec 17 2005, 10:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
And this is pretty god damned rude of you. You are free to leave. Goodbye.


hear hear. and all of us who felt uncomfortable with vdud's presence here will breathe a sigh of relief, knowing he is gone.

thanks ((((vera)))) (((((nicole)))) and all the mods for keeping us safe and making sure all members abide by the rules. its because of your presence that i feel safe here.

#9 heathbar

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Posted 17 December 2005 - 07:39 PM

I agree with Vera, serious legal implications could arise. I wouldn't want to be the one hauled into court.

#10 selene

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Posted 18 December 2005 - 10:07 AM

Firstly, I care very much for Fern. Hugs, honey. hug.gif hug.gif hug.gif I'll stay in touch through e-mail - hopefully I can get your e-mail address from somewhere.

However, I understand the point the moderatos are trying to make. So far I have only received love and support from the staff and they have always been willing to deal with my concerns. *big hug to all of you guys, well, girls smile.gif *

I think that it is sad that the law is the way it is, because honestly, I think that it is important that the younger survivors have a place to go to as well. I wish it were different, but the mods have to do what they think is best - and I trust the judgement of the staff.

I wish that you weren't quite as impulsive about all of this, Dave. hug.gif (and, might I add, not so rude - you're not making things easier for Fern by acting that way, you know)

Hugs to all
Selene

#11 Vera

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Posted 18 December 2005 - 10:21 AM

Thanks for understanding. All your words are really appreciated.

I will close this topic now to respect what this board is for: support and healing.

Thanks again.