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Welcome to After Silence - A message board and chat room for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors.

Welcome to After Silence, a message board and chat room designed to help survivors communicate in the recovery of rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, and all types of sexual violence.

After Silence has over 30 different forums, ranging from topics created to discuss specific areas of healing and recovery from rape and sexual violence, as well as forums open to general discussions and lighter topics. Because we value the privacy of our members, most of our forums are private, which means that ONLY REGISTERED members have access to them. Please register for a free account to gain full access to the After Silence Online Support Group.

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us at aftersilence.moderators@gmail.com
Guest Message by DevFuse

Hello.... Im a new guy

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13 replies to this topic

#1 Guest_CharmedQuark_*

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Posted 04 April 2004 - 09:17 PM

My psychiatrist tells me that this is a good step to take... I am not so sure. I told her that I feel like people will be afraid of me for what I am and I will be uncomfortable trying to explain my own story, so whats the use? But here I am, and I hope she is right and that this does help. I was abused from the first time I can remember until puberty - and it has really screwed me up, I am a social disaster, I cant make friends, I am 35 and I dont even have a girlfriend. Is this common? Are there other people out there who have gone through this too?

#2 aquapit


    ~Beauty is all around~

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Posted 04 April 2004 - 09:27 PM

(((CharmedQuark)))Welcome to After Silence! I am so sorry to hear that you have been through so much, but I am glad that you took this step. You are not alone here. I hope you find this place as warm, safe, and supportive as I have. This place has helped me so much and everyone has made me feel so welcome and loved. Take precious care of yourself and post when you are ready to. We are here for you.


#3 Guest_moonsmile_*

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Posted 04 April 2004 - 09:30 PM

welcome!! First, I ll say I am sorry that you have to be here. THere are thousands upon thousands of people who have been through something simular. My abuse by my stepfather stopped when I started puberty too. But that didn't stop anything else from happening. I was abused again at fifteen by an 18 yr old male.

You can talk about anything or ask anything on here and everyone is understanding. That is what is so beautiful about this site.

#4 Lilea


    Tender Heart

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Posted 04 April 2004 - 10:32 PM

Hi there... glad you are here and sorry you have a reason to be here. We are all here to heal together, and try to make this journey a little bit gentler. So many people here have had such different responses to our abuse... especially with regards to relationships. It's not uncommon or abnormal or weird to not have a gf at 35, given your history. it is hard to trust and let people in... I am sure that is true especially if your abuser was a woman. I hope that you find this to be positive, and good for you for seeking counseling! Big step to take!

#5 Guest_Madonna_*

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Posted 04 April 2004 - 10:49 PM

Welcome! It's a pleasure to meet you. I was abused right up until puberty too and yes I have a lot of social issues as well. I hope you feel less uncomfortable now that you have introduced yourself. We are all here to help each other and heal together smile.gif


#6 Clarissa


    Little Dancing Butterfly

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Posted 05 April 2004 - 02:14 AM

(((charmedquark)))) Welcome to after silence. I hope you find healing and support here as i have. We'll be here for you.

#7 cervantes



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Posted 05 April 2004 - 03:51 AM

Welcome CharmedQuark, I'm also a male survivor of long-term childhood abuse, struggling with similiar issues. I hope that you stay whereas we may become good friends. All of the above people and more are the best understanding and compassionate people you will ever find!

Your friend,

#8 Sookie



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Posted 05 April 2004 - 08:06 PM

I hope u find this as safe a place as i have.. smile.gif
Every1 ere is non judgemental-every1 is understandin,kind,lovin.. smile.gif
I hope we get 2 know u more as u get 2 know us..
((huggles,smiles en friednship love..)) Sookie xo

#9 Kelsie



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Posted 05 April 2004 - 10:26 PM

Welcome CharmedQuark,

I'm sorry for all the terrible stuff you've gone through. It's good that you found this wonderful place, and I'm sure that you will find it very helpful.
I don't know about everyone, but I have a lot of trouble in communicating with people, and know that my brother has too..
Some of our first memories were also of being abused by our ex-uncle.
So glad to have you here, and make yourself at home. :yes:


#10 Guest_Dreamer_*

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Posted 05 April 2004 - 11:22 PM

hi charmedquark,

welcome here. it' s quite a refuge. and if it comforts you: i'm 33 and single and I usually am.
in many ways quite used to it.

~ dreamer

#11 betty


    spero melior

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Posted 06 April 2004 - 07:20 AM

hello, i am sorry to hear about all the bad times you've been through. i too was abused by a family member for many years, and i find it hard to form relationships. i am constantly parnoid that people are talking about me or laughing at me etc i also find it hard to let people get physically close to me, even a hug can make me panic.
i hope that this place will help you, it has helped me a great deal already, just to know there are people out there who understand what you are going through and who will listen without being judgmental.
take care of youself

[Edited on 4-6-2004 by betty]

#12 Lindy


    Running Princess

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Posted 06 April 2004 - 10:06 AM


Welcome to After Silence! I hope you find all the support you're seeking here.

Take gentle care,


#13 Guest_willow_*

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Posted 06 April 2004 - 10:57 AM

I'm new here too and welcome you.

It really does make a difference to talk to people. I have been a part of a forum elsewhere on emotional/verbal abuse and have found it to have helped me heal alot.

Here I am more of a person who works with people who've had trauma. My sister was sexually abused and I don't have any memory of it happening to me.

Many of my clients who've been abused are male like yourself. You are not alone in this it crosses to both genders. It is equally devestating to all human souls...

#14 Rebel Grrl

Rebel Grrl

    Headbanger Grrlie

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Posted 06 April 2004 - 04:45 PM

Welcome to After Silence. smile.gif I'm sorry you're struggling, and I'm sorry you have reason to be here. I think you will get a lot of support and help here. smile.gif