I Just Joined Today

[spartyman1971]

I don't know if I am allowed to comment yet as I just joined today. I can hardly wait to be able to speak. I have carried my burden for 65 years and found out a few days ago that I probably won't be on planet earth for as long as I wanted. I want to talke with other men and women that were were sexually abised but never told anyone.

My uncle sexually for a long time. Of course, he quit when I became 17. I have never told anyone and was ever a pallbearer at his funeral. ugh!

I am looking for some andvice and love as I have decided to let my immediate family know what happened to me and how it has affected me. I simply do not want to take this to my grave. I feel my immediated family has a right to know as it will also explain my sometimes quirky behavior.

Tom

[MeBeMary]

Hi Tom,

Welcome to AS. I'm sorry for the trauma that you suffered and have suffered for those 65 years. I am also very sorry for the diagnosis you received a few days ago that makes you believe that you won't be here much longer. You are not alone in keeping quiet, tho. Many of us have held onto these secrets most of our life. AfterSilence was my own first admission to what had happened to me. This is a very supportive site.

You are allowed to comment and post in most of the forums, but "Share Your Story" requires 10 posts of any type first, they can be your own postings or comments on others. There is also "Survivor Connections" forum where you can access a males only forum, but will have to contact a moderator to receive a password. Other than that, just look around and read the descriptions to help guide you thru. I hope you find the peace you so richly deserve.

Mary

[Minerba]

Hello Tom, welcome. I'm so sorry you experienced abuse. It was not your fault. It was not fair.

Thank you for sharing this with us. You are being very brave. It takes courage to break the silence.

You have taken an important decision. It is your right to tell. Maybe if you write down what you want to say: what he did to you, how it has affected you, what your expectations are from them.

I wonder if you have a friend who could be there for you for support. Think about what you are going to do after the disclosure. Maybe you want to do something nice for you.

I hope everything will turn up fine. I wish you all the best.

May you be well.

[reglois]

if OK

I only spoke out 4 1/2 years ago having kept it all in for 63 years mine ended when my last abuser, my *H* died,

you can heal yourself, I am doing just that albeit slowly.

Edited September 20, 2015 by reglois

[Donnna]

I have been sitting hear staring at the screen. Typing and deleating. let me just start with

Hi Tom this is my first time on a forum ever. I read the post I am 35. I hope I can brave up and do what you are.

[reglois]

if OK Donnna

[kyukidojen]

Tom,

Welcome to After Silence. You are very brave to be sharing your story with your family. That is such a huge and scary step. I have been here at AS for years. It has helped me so much, both to be heard and to be hearing. I hope you find it to be as helpful as I have. What happened to you was not your fault. It was horrible, and it is entirely their fault. You deserve to be heard and supported, and AS can do that for you.

Again, welcome.

Jenn

[angelic]

Hello Tom,

welcome to After Silence, I am so sorry to read your post about all you've been dealing with. I am one of the Newbie support team here, and I hope you are finding your way around the board okay. if you need any help with anything, please contact me or one of the team

take care,

Paula