Hi....this Is My First Ever Post On A Forum....never Imagined It Would Be On Here!

[Raeflower]

Hi, not really sure what to write. I'm Rachael, I'm 27 and I have Never felt so lost and so alone in all my life. Ive read everything I can get my hands on about surviving rape and sexual assult

And I just can't apply it.

I'm nervous, I can't eat, I can't sleep, I lash out

At people I love, my work is suffering and I am about to

Loose my job, i feel like I'm not inside and I am watching a zombie living

My life, I feel lonely and can't believe I'm

Typing all this to people I don't even know.

I haven't been able to talk about my story for a while and I told my

Boyfriend on Friday night who has been so understanding and loving, he held me tight, listened to me and said all the right things, but I can't Accept his love and concern. I'm scared he will use violence against this man And get into trouble. I'm scared he will leave me because I'm a mess.

I'm sorry if I've put too much detail on here :0( and I hope to meet people

Who are going through what I am. I just need to know I'm not alone.

Rach xxx

[Astro29]

Hi Rachel,

You aren't alone. This site was created because so many of us need a place to talk about what has happened with people who have gone through similar things.

I hope you find some answers and some peace here,

Astro

[Amaris]

Hi Rachel and welcome! I'm so sorry that you were brought here by such circumstances, and I'm sorry you're hurting so much. You're not alone. You'll find lots of people here that are going through the same or similar things. I hope you find the support and healing that you need.

[Raeflower]

Hi Rachel,

You aren't alone. This site was created because so many of us need a place to talk about what has happened with people who have gone through similar things.

I hope you find some answers and some peace here,

Astro

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I would love some answers. Just struggling to find them and find a light. I guess time is the best healer. X

[Raeflower]

Hi Rachel and welcome! I'm so sorry that you were brought here by such circumstances, and I'm sorry you're hurting so much. You're not alone. You'll find lots of people here that are going through the same or similar things. I hope you find the support and healing that you need.

Thank you! I just want to function and have my sparkle back and a smile. Hopefully I will find it soon. Thankyou for replying. Please point me in the direction of some help on this sight or a good place to chat as I am the most untechnical person ever haha x

[Amaris]

Well, I've only been here a few weeks and still discovering parts of the site! Good starting points are probably Gathering Place or The Aftermath - you'll find people posting messages directly about the issues they're dealing with after rape or abuse. You can start your own topic, or you can read other people's and reply if you like. There's a forum called Share your Story which is probably the best place if you want to tell your story of exactly what happened to you, but you don't have to if you don't want to. That forum is protected so you can only go there if you have over 10 posts, or you can request a password from a moderator. You can either send one a private message, or add a request to this thread. You might just be happier browsing the other forums until you have 10+ posts. The other forums are pretty self-explanatory, you might want to go there if you have particular issues. There's no pressure, you can get stuck in and start new topics, or just sit back and read through other people's threads. I've found it very helpful to read other people's stories, to realise that I'm not alone in the feelings I have. Feel free to send me a private message if you get stuck! To do that, you just hover over the name on the left, click to get the menu, and click "send message".

[Shido]

There is also a chat room you can access after you have 10 posts. Welcome to AS!

[~FOUND~]

:hug:

Hi there.

Welcome to AS.

I hope you find this site to be helpful.

Found

[blossums]

Hi Rach, welcome to AS

I am really sorry you are hurting so much just now though perfectly understand why you would be. I do think it's possible to get your spark back, and hope you will find some great support and help here

Have to agree with everything Amaris and shido say, and if there's ever anything i can do to help you find your way around here, let me know and I would be very glad to help

[Raeflower]

Hi Rach, welcome to AS

I am really sorry you are hurting so much just now though perfectly understand why you would be. I do think it's possible to get your spark back, and hope you will find some great support and help here

Have to agree with everything Amaris and shido say, and if there's ever anything i can do to help you find your way around here, let me know and I would be very glad to help

I'm trying to find my sparkle, I'm trying to look after myself a bit better and it's nice (if that's the right word) to know I'm not alone, comforting is probably better. I can't believe so many people are affected by sexual violence. It's horrifying :0( I wish I could do more about it.

[~FOUND~]

I hope you are finding your way around the boards ok.

Found

[blossums]

I'm trying to find my sparkle, I'm trying to look after myself a bit better and it's nice (if that's the right word) to know I'm not alone, comforting is probably better. I can't believe so many people are affected by sexual violence. It's horrifying :0( I wish I could do more about it.

I know what you mean, the conflicted feelings between being relieved not to be alone, and horrified at how many others go through it!

Looking after ourselves a bit more is a really great thing to do

All the best luv

[DeeMarie]

I would like access to the protected forum (female survivor). I have access to the other protected forums, but still no access to this one.