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SnowDragon24

What Did You Do For You Today?

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You guys are gonna laugh at me...but I whitened my smile today with a home kit. My teeth were severely yellowed from years of smoking and I finally did something about it. :)

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Today I ate a candy bar to help re-balance myself after T. And I reminded myself to drink lots of water 'cause for whatever reason, stress makes me dehydrate.

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Today I rested, consciously NOT working.

(Well, okay. Not working much. Being idle goes against my grain. But by my standards I didn't work much at all!)

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Today I woke up with a massive energy headache (the kind I get when I do too much energy work...and I'm learning will also happen when an Insider/Insiders throw a tantrum that I have to contain).

So I took careful care of my body today. I ate and drank things that I know help energy headaches. I read a couple chapters in a rather cheesy fantasy novel. I avoided anything noisy and spent hours under my headphones to minimize outside sound.

My head still hurts, but I think a decent night's sleep will fix it.

It better-- I got T tomorrow!

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I changed the arrangement of my living room furniture. What an improvement...wish I'd done it ages ago.

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Today I played with a new box of watercolor pencils...that were a gift from Teacher!!!

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Today I played with a new box of watercolor pencils...that were a gift from Teacher!!!

I have zippo artistic talent, but I love those!

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yed with a new box of watercolor pencils...that were a gift from Teacher!!!

I have zippo artistic talent, but I love those!

Along with collage, watercolor pencil is probably my favorite medium. They're so much fun to play with!

Edited by CopperPhoenix

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I reinstated my nipple piercing-turns out it never closed. :) I also put on a pretty shirt and really girlied it up today.

Edited by ShylaRose

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Today I sat and blissed out to some incredible music, did a huge cleansing meditation.

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Today I got out of the house and stayed that way. Explored a couple shops I hadn't been in before, bought some adorable socks (bright colors with white peace signs on them!!!) and took myself out to a Chinese dinner.

I'm wiped but a very happy camper.

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Today I realized that I was in no shape to go anywhere, so I stayed home and rested. Mostly.

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I indulged in the most divinely rich and gooey caramel sundae, made with Rocky Road ice cream and topped with toasted pecans.

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It was difficult coming to this site today...I need to share my story- but do not know where to post it...I do not even know if I am ready to tell it...the Sleeping With The Enemy Comes to my mind at this time...yes, I have been in contact with the perpetrator...oh, he doesn't want anything to do with me...hmmm, let's see, he accused me of calling him names...well, could calling him a "rapist" be one of them? Really? Was it a lie? Of course not...did he ever apologize? No...but I am the "bad" person- because I called it what it was- or should I say- called him what he is...when a woman says "no"- she means "no"..no, it was not the whole enchilada, so to speak...only because he is not able to perform...but what he did was just as violent and damaging to me- even if he could have done the whole act, it would not have hurt me any more or any less! I said "no"! I keep playing the scene over and over in my mind...he knew he was going to do it that very day, that very night...but I did not know....if it didn't happen then- it just would have happened another time. All I thought I wanted was for him to apologize- to say that he was sorry- but he wouldn't! I never would have said anything about it...I was so afraid to be alone with him after that...course, it didn't take long before our relationship broke-off again...this time cause he was going back to the ex...oh yeah, that is what he really needed to tell me after violating me- he was now getting his dream come true and the ex wanted to reconcile with him..only, I didn't let him leave without him knowing what we both knew- and I gave him the name that he is- but I am the bad person for calling him that- not that he is the bad person for doing what he did.! So, I have chatted via text with him recently...oh yeah, that is what restrictions he has me back on- text only! He doesn't want to see me or speak to me on the phone...I thought I could forgive him without him ever apologizing...but can I live with the elephant in the room? So, being the narcissitic person that he is- he has turn the tables around, and now I am the bad person- I called him a rapist...and that is exactly what he is...that is exactly what he did to me...but what eats at me every day of my life- is the "why"....it is the answer I will never have...why me, why now, what did I deserve for him to do this to me? I had known him since I was 17 years old...had dated him for the past 8 years on and off....had taken the emotional cut-off from him time and time again...being treated so poorly...there was no reason for him to hold me down with his body weight, no reason to go against my will...no reason for him not to listen to my pleas of "no"!

Edited by guessangelina

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today, all I did was sleep, housework, drank and ate... oh yeah and now im on the computer, lol

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I spend some time playing basketball with my adoptive sister (and also survivor) Lucy.

It was fun, and I am happy that I saw her smiling as well.

Crystal

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