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Looking For A Place Where I'm Understood...


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Hi there--

I was abused by my older siblings when I was a child, and am now in the process of truly trying to recover and heal from it. After years of trying to push it out of my mind, forget it, ignore it, and drown it (and me) out...I'm ready to face it head-on. To be honest, this is the scariest time of my life. And it's easy to feel alone in this...I would love just to know that I am no alone. I know I'm not, but it's easy to feel that way. I wish everyone on here, whatever happened to them, the courage, strength, and peace of healing. We all deserve this. I know the pain that this brings, the terror--but I also think it can bring a grace and appreciation with life that some people will never know. My therapist told me that sexual abuse survivors are like those who survived the holocaust--they are strong, and invite a certain respect. The quote that helps me right now is this: "Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." (Helen Keller)

Wishing you all healing.

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Hi there--

I was abused by my older siblings when I was a child, and am now in the process of truly trying to recover and heal from it. After years of trying to push it out of my mind, forget it, ignore it, and drown it (and me) out...I'm ready to face it head-on. To be honest, this is the scariest time of my life. And it's easy to feel alone in this...I would love just to know that I am no alone. I know I'm not, but it's easy to feel that way. I wish everyone on here, whatever happened to them, the courage, strength, and peace of healing. We all deserve this. I know the pain that this brings, the terror--but I also think it can bring a grace and appreciation with life that some people will never know. My therapist told me that sexual abuse survivors are like those who survived the holocaust--they are strong, and invite a certain respect. The quote that helps me right now is this: "Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." (Helen Keller)

Wishing you all healing.

I'm new, too. I just made my first post. It was difficult to post, but I did it. I know you are scared because I am scared too. I want you to know that you are not alone. We have both taken that important step.

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Hello!

:aswelcomesu:

I hope you find all supports and love here as much as I do :flowers:

the quote is used by me too teeheeehee :blush:

:notalone:

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Hi there.

Welcome to AS.

I hope you find this site to be helpful.

Thank you for sharing.

Your bravery speaks volumes.

Found

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Hi there--

I was abused by my older siblings when I was a child, and am now in the process of truly trying to recover and heal from it. After years of trying to push it out of my mind, forget it, ignore it, and drown it (and me) out...I'm ready to face it head-on. To be honest, this is the scariest time of my life. And it's easy to feel alone in this...I would love just to know that I am no alone. I know I'm not, but it's easy to feel that way. I wish everyone on here, whatever happened to them, the courage, strength, and peace of healing. We all deserve this. I know the pain that this brings, the terror--but I also think it can bring a grace and appreciation with life that some people will never know. My therapist told me that sexual abuse survivors are like those who survived the holocaust--they are strong, and invite a certain respect. The quote that helps me right now is this: "Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." (Helen Keller)

Wishing you all healing.

Hi Scout

Welcome to AS and I hope that you keep coming. Helen was a truly amazing individual wasn't she? I like the quote, it is fitting.

I hope to "see" more of you and share what you feel comfortable with and know that without needing to be understood, although you will find that is a big part of the beauty of this place, you are accepted.

Hugs to you if they are okay and I am glad you found the door to the road for your journey to a healing place.

I am sorry that anyone ever hurt you. It was wrong and they should not have.

Hugs and blessed be

Dragon

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I hope you are finding your way around the boards ok.

Found

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Hi Scout,

I think I'd like a T like yours. I appreciated your kind words. I don't see a therapist since I'm afraid of talking about a lot of things from my past - I find the internet less threatening, and less real. I dread the reaction I might get from a therapist. I'm sure there'll be a distinct lack of caring :/ Is your therapist genuinely caring?

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Thinking of you.

Found

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Hi Scout,

Welcome to Aftersilence :tealribbon:

I agree with the quote you ended with, and it's truly inspirational.

I hope you find the support you are looking for and I'm sorry for the reason you had to come here.

Mandy

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  • 2 weeks later...

welcome to after-silence. :)

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Hi Scout,

I think I'd like a T like yours. I appreciated your kind words. I don't see a therapist since I'm afraid of talking about a lot of things from my past - I find the internet less threatening, and less real. I dread the reaction I might get from a therapist. I'm sure there'll be a distinct lack of caring :/ Is your therapist genuinely caring?

Lonelyprisoner,

Yes, my therapist really is that caring and wonderful. He has been what's kept me going many a time. I can completely understand your fear about talking about things from your past--but if you take things slowly, and can begin to understand and piece together your past, it WILL help. I can't speak for all therapist of course, but let your intuition guide you--if you have to keep looking until you find the right one, then that is perfectly understandable, necessary, and what you DESERVE. However, if I may be honest, I think your fear about the lack of caring is not really about the therapist, but about the people who let you down and/or abused you. You'd be surprised how caring people are, how nurturing--and this is a field they choose because they want to make a difference. Please consider find a therapist, or perhaps a support group--I know it would be a very, very positive thing for you, one that will truly help you get on the road to healing.

My problem/coping mechanism has always been to push people away and isolate myself. That was my way of staying "safe." But the truth is, nothing is so horrible as feeling like no one understands or cares. Often that is NOT the case, those are just the fears and issues with lack of trust that were a direct result of being sexually abused.

Blessings to you--you are NOT alone. There are people who care and who want to help! This is the very least you deserve. Stay strong my friend, and please REACH OUT.

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