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comet

Topic For Those Who Have Healed

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Hello,

I would like to suggest some sort of topic for those who have completely healed (if that's possible)

I think it would bring a lot of hope to others, especially new members. My first time here, I asked so many people whether or not they were healed. I wanted to know if they still thought about their experiences on a daily basis. Basically I wanted to get an idea of what I was in for.

I can also see the difficulties in such a topic. What if no one completely heals? If they do, would they even come back to this site and talk about it? I am probably too new to fully understand yet.

Anyways, just a suggestion. Maybe others can express their views regarding this.

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Well, here are my views anyway, and thanks for the opportunity to express 'em, because it's something I've thought a lot about in the later stages of healing.

I don't think anyone can heal completely. This is because life hurts. But wait! There's more! To completely heal, to me, is to finally be able to realize that everybody has pain. Everyone has some trauma they carry for their entire lives - and sometimes that trauma is a lack thereof, an inability to connect to others when they need human connection the most. To see the beauty in everybody having pain, everybody's mortality and vulnerability, even though the playing field is in no way equal, shows great strides in healing.

To completely heal is to keep getting back up with more grace every time you fall down; to remember yourself faster and better every time you forget yourself; to better know how to see the bright side every time you fail; and to learn how to let go when others fail you. There's no completely healing. I felt completely healed and then my friend died in a car crash with perfect comedic timing, except of course it wasn't funny. I thought I had my last flashback and then, over a year after my last one, I had another - but what a length of time to go without one!

There are always more ways and more reasons to hurt. Most of them have to do with love, which also happens to be the reason we feel joy. So it's worth it. There are joy-summers and hurt-winters for all of us. I guess healing is the journey where you learn how to spend your winters in peace and as much prosperity as possible given your limited resources, and your summers fully embracing the world, falling in love with it so you'll never forget what life is worth.

To quote a classic, "I never promised you a rose garden. I never promised you perfect justice, and I never promised you peace or happiness. My help is so that you can be free to fight for all of those things. The only reality I offer is challenge, and being well is being free to accept it or not at whatever level you are capable. I never promise lies, and the rose-garden world of perfection is a lie . . . and a bore, too!" I would add to the classic - it's not always so challenging. There are moments of wonderful peace to enjoy too - but moments of peace, like moments of pain, pass. You're still here.

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i liked what you said about healing

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There is a good book, Trauma and Recovery that gives stages of healing that may be of encouragement to others in how one heals, the stages and resolutions. It has helped me and helped me come to an understanding of where I am in the healing process.

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That is a wonderful suggestion Comet. I hope we can start this too.

Found

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I will make sure admin and other mods see your suggestions

best wishes

karen

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That's a great suggestion, comet. We're definitely considering adding this option. Thanks!

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I agree that this is a great option... I was actually wanting to post something to help people dealing with recent assaults and memories, but I wasn't sure where to post it

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