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My name is Magi. I'm currently 24--soon to be 25. I have been blessed. I have found my soul mates and I have two wonderful children--both girls, how I pray that what happened to me never does to them. No child should ever have to go through what I did.

I haven't verbalized the words. I have trouble thinking of myself in those terms even as I acknowledge that I was hurt, that I was betrayed. I have really bad nightmares, reliving that night. I have panic attacks occasionally over seemingly random things. Sometimes I remember and feel like crying or screaming or destroying something--anything to stop the pain from overwhelming me. I've barely talked about it with my lovers and only then because they caused a panic reaction and wanted to know why.

I am hoping that AS will help me farther my journey on the path of healing. I think I'm ready for this step.

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Welcome to AS, Magi. I hope you find what you need here.

It's very difficult to verbalize what happened, to put a label on it, but in some ways it can also be sort of ... freeing.

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Hi there.

Welcome to AS.

I hope you find this site to be helpful.

Thank you for sharing this with us.


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Guest SaraElizabeth

Hi Magi and welcome to AS :flowers:

My name is Sara and I'm a member of the Newbie Support Team here at AfterSilence, so if you have any questions or problems then please feel free to send me a message and I'll do my best to help you out :)

I'm so happy that you've found your soulmates and have wonderful children - that must be so rewarding and bring so much happiness into your life. I'm sorry though that you have to deal with the aftermath - you can talk about it here and won't be judged.

Take good care,

Sara x

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welcome to as, magi.

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Im new here .. I have just recently gotten help for the abuse i have been through since i was very young. I have never talked about except once and my family memeber said I was lying. so i guess Ill try to talk to people I dont know.


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Thanks for all the kind welcomings. I'm still kind of exploring the site...getting a feel for the lay of the land, so to speak. [bites her bottom lip] I don't have to tell my story right away, do I?

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the thing about the website is you dont have to do anything.

Everything you say or do is up to you. Your in control.

Talking about it helps. I found for me it helpped being able to talk to people that know how you feel and can give advice thats helpped them even if its not about your story but the aftermath of it from nightmares to stress and panic attacks. It also reminds me im not alone.

Please always remember your never alone. :hug:

Welcome to AS to both of you Mas and Angel :hug:

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