Hi *waves*

[Guest AllisonY2K]

Hello all, yes I'm new.

(and I apologize for length)

My name is Allison, and I reside in sunny (b/c it's after hurricane season) Florida. I am 29. I am a pre-operative male-to-female transsexual. I was fortunate to find a counselling center (through RAINN's website) that is GLBT-friendly and tho legally I had to be categorized as male and give my male name, they considered me female. It seemed appropriate since I basically consider myself female, too.

So anyway, to give a brief summary:

I was raped in 1997 in college by a guy who lived in my dorm. Never reported it, never pressed charges, never talked to anyone about it.

Last month I was sexually assaulted in my home by a guy who I had met from the internet. Again, haven't reported it, haven't pressed charges.

I don't think I will ever report either incident, and my main hurdle in dealing with this is accepting the fact that none of this was my fault. Also it wasn't because of me as a person, but what I am. (female, TS)

I just called a rape crisis hotline yesterday and had an initial meeting today with my victim advocate. Very productive meeting, and I was given a bunch of materials to read which I poured over all night at work.

I also feel stereotypical for posting Tori Amos lyrics in my signature but those two lines express what I've felt for a long time.

But anyway, that's me.

More detailed stories in the appropriate forums, and if any of you have questions about me in regards to being a transsexual or transitioning, don't hesitate to ask!

[Haullie]

Allison,

I am so happy that you decided to come to 'After Silence' to tell your story. It doesn't matter who you are in this forum, you are accepted and supported just the same. And I tell you what, from here on out just reffer to yourself as female. I know that has to be the most comfortable feeling for you to just express and be the person you were born to be and there is no shame against that. Just because of your personal sexual refference, it doesn't mean you asked for it. You are carrying around the same feelings, same trauma, same every day stress of the Aftermath of rape just like any other Survivor. I'm just so pleased you have decided now is the time to start your healing successfully. You make us all proud just for having strength to tell us your story. welcome to 'After Silence' sweetie! Big Hugs!

Love, Haullie :inn:

[Vera]

((((Allison)))

welcome to After Silence. I'm sorry to hear you were abused and I hope you'll find all the support and love you deserve here. I'm glad to read you contacted RAINN, I know it takes a lot of courage, be proud of yourself

Hugs,

Vera

[Donna]

((((Alison))))

Welcome to the board honey, post as much as you would like and know that we are here for you.

((((hugs))))

Donna =)

[Banned3S]

Welcome to the board Allison.

I am sure you will find all the support here at AS to help you through your journey towards healing.

claire.

[tulip]

Welcome Allison, make yourself comfortable here, you are not alone.

Katerine

[Charlene]

welcome to the boards and i know you'll find all the support you need here

[dopey]

hello alison! welcome to the boards!

im sure youll find it helps,

take care

xxx

[Guest AllisonY2K]

I guess I have just jumped right into conversations and keeping up with everything. I wanted to thank you all for the warm welcome.