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Thanks For A Safe Place


nana2five

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Hi, My name is Melinda. I am a Nana in Colorado. My Grand daughter has just told me that her step father has been molesting her for the past year and a half. My step daughter knows but chooses not to believe her. Her step dad has moved to an apartment until court in January.

My problems are many. My grand daughter is being isolated from all of her friends because her mom is afraid of others finding out. My step daughter in the mean time has tapped their phone and set up security cameras to make sure my grand daughter doesnt call anyone, email anyone, or see anyone. My grand daughter is 13 years old. Her school closed so she had to go to a new one in her 8th grade year, her other Grandma moved out of state, she feels like everyone has left her.

My husband doesnt know anything about this. I want to tell him, and plan to, I have no doubts that he will either hurt his son in law badly or even worse. I have contacted my Pastor and together we plan to tell him. I am very scared of the outcome.

I will do anything I can to be there for my Grand daughter. Once her mom knows that we know, I have no doubt she will not let us see her, and then we will be forced to take this to court.

I too am a survivor of rape and molestation as a child, noone protected me. I have worked through this and mananged to raise 3 wonderful kids and am now emotionally healthy, (well somewhat anyways) :) This is my new husbands family, I love these Grandkids like my own. I should also mention there is a 7 year old boy whom the courts are allowing his father to be part of his life unsupervised.

Since finding out sunday, I am sick. I cannot carry this burden alone. I want to make sure that everything I do has a good motive, to help my Grandkids.

Thank you for a safe place to talk. Melinda

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Melinda,

You sound like a very wise and compasinate women. It sounds like you are doing all the right things. I am sad that the mother is not taking more care in protecting her daugther instead of sheltering her from telling anyone. I hope your grand daughter knows that she can trust you and that she is not alone. That is what you can do for her the most. I don't have any answers but I can sure listen. We all can. You came to the right place. :hug::hug::hug:

Dawn

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:hug: Hi Melinda and welcome. I am a survivor of child sexual abuse also. I am sorry about your grad-daughter. This is a very safe place to talk, and we will try and help anyway we can.

best wishes, Paula :hug:

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Paula and Dawn,

Thank you both for your kindness. Serena (My grand daughter) does know I am here for her. I also know that when I share this with her Grandpa she will be angry with me. I am sad about that, but he needs to know so that we together can protect her and do everything we can for her and her little brother.

My fears are that when all is said and done, I will be seen as the wicked Nana. I dont see a good outcome for me, however, if Serena is helped, thats ok. I want her to know that there are good and bad people in this world and the trick is to surround yourself with winners.

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Hi Melinda, welcome to after silence. I am also a survivor csa and rape. I'm glad you're here. This is a good place to find understanding and support. You're a caring and loving nana to your grandaughter. I'm glad she has you to go to for help.

When I was a young girl, I had a nana who loved me. She was the only normal person in my life as a kid. That meant a lot to me. I'm sure you mean a lot to your grandaughter as well.

~Erin~

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Welcome to After Silence :flowers:

I am glad to hear you have come to a good place in your healing personally, but I am sorry to hear that there is abuse going on in your family. I hope you are able to help protect the innocent ones!

Nicole :throb:

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  • 2 weeks later...

You came to the right place. Im new here and have found so many willing to listen and care. You are helping her as much as you (I hope her mom mellows out with the not helpful stuff soon) Some people just care about the presentation of perfection more than the actual rape recovery repair that is less perfect, less pretty, and way less healthy. My best to you.

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