Old Problem

[Stryder7]

Hi,

I'm not sure why I'm here... was told that I might find some help here that I haven't been able to find anywhere else in my 54 yrs.(the last 31 of which I have been fighting my demons)

I have 7 yrs of my life that WAS a blank and I was happy with them being a blank. Now between the nightmares and flashbacks I just don't know anymore. I was diagnoses with PTSD before it became the latest "fad" diagnosis. I have a psyc dr. but I moved just as things were starting to come out. For a long time I traveled back and forth sometimes 2 times a month (5 hrs there and 5 hrs back) sometimes more depending on traffic and how may stops I make. The last 3 yrs I haven't been there too often, health problems were getting me. I have a friend that lives here that has helped me with a lot of my problems-getting them out and on paper- and I am blessed to have her as a friend. For a while the nightmares and flashbacks calmed down. They seemed to escalate depending on what age my daughter was at-the assocation I guess- but she is almost 30 and has been away from home for a long time...( I am happy to say she and her wonderful hubby are expecting-I'm going to be a grandma) anyway(rambling on here) things are not good here... hubby and I just "exist" in the same house. We are quite isolated here and my worst demon "DEPRESSION" is out in full force these days. I just can't seem to do anything and it doesn't help that I am not even allowed to buy a can of paint to make this place more likable. The vaccum doesn't work and I'm embarrassed to have anyone over-even my best friend, but that is another story. The biggest problem is HOW do i get out of this depression. I can hardly make myself get up in the morning to go to my chair and watch TV all day... I am a writer ... i haven't touched my latest book in almost 2 yrs... Please if anyone can help me I'd sure be thankful... Stryder7

Edited November 29, 2006 by Stryder7

[dodo]

Hi and welcome to AS

It is lovely to see you here - you will find so much support and friendship and a good reason to get up in the morning!!

Best wishes

karen

[sueellen]

Welcome to AS. Lots of caring support here and will give you a reason to get up.

Sue

[Lene]

Welcome to AS

As others have said AS can be your reason to get up.There's always someone about and it's a great source of support and much needed love and understanding.So,try and get up(I know how hard that is by the way)and come to AS where you will be heard and understood.Welcome to the family honey!

Lene x

[against the current]

Stryder

Welcome hon.

I know you'll find so much support here. Almost everyone around can identify with at least something going on in your life. I'm sorry your dealing with depression...boy, do I know about that monser!

Wow, you're a writer? I will soon (maybe if I can get off my butt) graduate with an English degree. I love to write...I don't have the patience for novels tho...I prefer poetry..

anyway

Welcome!!!

[Twiggy]

Stryder - hello! I'm new here too and I know what you mean about blanks. I'm just starting to fill mine in...it's from 30+ years ago.

Sounds like your depression is pretty overwhelming. Have you been to your md? They might be able to refer you to someone closer to you for therapy. Is your daughter close enough you could visit? Maybe a weekend? Sounds like it would do you a world of good to have a change of scenery!

Hang in there, kiddo.

[Donna]

Welcome to AS hun.

[silent no more]

welcome. if you can get to ur md try and see if he will put u on an antidepressant. i am on cymbalta and it has made a world of difference. you will find great support here.

[Butterflyangelbaby]

Welcome To AS glad to have you here

You will find everyone here is very supportive and caring

I look forward to talking to you

Take Care

[whitedove]

I too am a writer and enjoy it much. I hope you can find what you are looking for here at After Silence. It has helped me tremendously.

Whitedove

Edited December 11, 2006 by whitedove

[~Catherine~]

Welcome to After Silence, hon

:hug:

Catherine

[Macey]

Hi

It can be near impossible to work when you feel depressed! motivation, concentration etc are at their worst at times!

I dont know if you are somewhere that you can get counselling? But even if you do, why not consider anti depressants? I guess you may have been down that route before at least once or twice but I am sure you know they wont cure your PTSD. They can help give you the strength to face changes though, as you already know it can be very tough.

Also, I dont know where you are but it would be worth asking your GP if he can recommend appropriate services or your psych if you are still under him? There are usually services set up specifically to help with situations like yours, whereby you are having domestic issues and dont know what help there is to get, support services arent just restricted to the 'relate' format of trying to patch things up these days, there may be options out there your GP or practice nurse can suggest.

It is a massive step to take - reaching out for support! Well done, there is plenty to go around here!

Edited December 13, 2006 by Macey

[holdingthechild26]

Welcome this is a great place and a wounderful group of poeple...I think you will like it here!!!