Hello

[angel4hope]

My name is Kristi and I am 24. I am a survivor of multiple offenses. At 4, I was molested by an older cousin only a handful of times. He was caught by my maternal grandmother and punished, but because was only 11 didn't do anytime or anyting like that. I have come to accept my cousins apology and he has never (to my knowledge) molested or assaulted anyone else. A few years later, an older cousin on my paternal side begin to do the same thing. This time I was afraid to be alone w/ him and actually got to the point were I was afraid to go to my grandparent's house. I never came forward w/ that one and I don't know why. He molested my female cousins and his cousins on the other side at the same time. They did come forward. He did some time in juvy. My parent's asked me if had done anything to me, but for some reason I told them no. There is part of me that tells me that they knew. Years went by and all was well. Then at the age of 16 I was assaulted by my boyfriends brother. I was brave enough at the time to go to the police. He admitted to "having sex" with me so I didn't have to go to trial (he was 23). He was sentecned to 8 years w/o the possiblity of parole b/c he was on parole for drug charges when it occured. He gets out of prison tomorrow!!!! I am going some pretty serious things now. I am afraid that he will try to hurt me when he gets out. I am questioning myself as to whether I did the right thing or not by sending him to prison. I know it may have stopped him from doing it to someone else, but now I am living in fear. I asked a lawyer about getting a restraining order against him. I was told that it would cost a min of $750! I don't have that kind of money! I am going to counseling, but I still feel I need help. That is why I am glad I found this website. I just wish I would have known about it long before now.

[shanon]

Hi! Welcome to AS Does the guy getting out of jail know where you live? Have you considered staying at a temporary new residence until you know that he will not do anything crazy? He might not because he will be on probation and, at least where I live, you go back to jail very easily will parole violations. Oh, and have you taken any self defense classes? It could help to make you feel safer. Anyways, welcome to the board

[Donna]

Welcome to AS hun. :bighug:

[angel4hope]

Probably, his brother knows where I live b/c he drives up and down my road sometimes. I have called the sheriff's office, but they say there is nothing they can do because it is on a road and he is not coming on to my property. The place I work at has off duty police officers as security guards. One of them I have befriended and explained my situatioon to. He has recommended a good self defense class and that I get a 9mm or .380 and concealled handgun license. I think this may be a good idea. I don't really have anywhere to go and I don't really want to leave my family. I am surrounded by them and they will all help take care of me. I am not so much worried that he will come to my home to try to harm me. See I live next door to my parents, my father would kill him as soon as he saw him and so would my husband. I am more concearned that he will try to do something when I am away from home. I have talked to his sister. She is supportive of me b/c he did somethings to her as a child. She said that from what her parents tell her is just wanting to start on a clean slate and that he wants to move to a diff state. He is not going to be on parole when he gets out. He did his complete sentence. I don't even know if he will be on probation. If he were then I wouldn't be nearly as concerned b/c if he came from what that srgt. told me if he came anywhere near me he could be in voilation. Same as if I got a restraining order. Does anyone know if an offender is released w/ being on parole or probation if there any laws saying they must not go near the person they offended? That is one question I need to ask the srgt. next time he is at work, I guess.

[AmyLyn]

Welcome to AS!

I hope you're alright

We're here for ya.

take care

[sueellen]

Hi and welcome to AS. Take care and be safe.

Sue

[whitedove]

Sorry, I cannot answer your question about whether he could be reported if they go near the person they offended. Is there a help line you could call in your country or perhaps the police?

You have been through a lot and I hope that After Silence can give you what you are looking for. Welcome

Whitedove