Wish We Could Be Meeting Under Different Circumstances

[bohica]

Hi all... I am new here but not to the recovery process. My being here tells me that although my life was finally coming to some real order, I am back in that place (spiritually, emotionally and physically) I know we all hate to be in.

I am about to start a new round of therapy to get to the deepest, darkest, nastiest things that were left over from all the other therapy. I can't blame the counselors from before; they didn't know as much about the effects as they do now. WE (and others like us) are the ones who give them their insight.

I have been being re-victimized by the person who caused the bulk of the damage in the first place. The difference between then and now are that I have my mother and my family of choice standing behind me. He is physically gone from my sight but I can't get rid of that feeling of evil deep in my soul. That place that is most spiritual and which I spent the most time cleansing. I have been pushed so far in the last couple of years that there is nothing but darkness there.

I am looking to expand my support system to include those who understand that dark place and the work it takes to enlighten it. And as favorite book says, "we teach best what we need most to learn." I have learned many things along the way that although at the moment, they seem to have been temporarily been lost to me, someone here may spark something in me that I may find helpful. We need other.

I have turned the messengers on after not bothering with them for many years. I am ready to meet new people and work through this. If you need to talk, seek me out.

Healing together,

bohica

[dodo]

Hi and welcome to AS

best wishes

Karen

[brobbitt]

Hi Bohica and welcome to the group, so hope you find that which you seek here!

"I am about to start a new round of therapy to get to the deepest, darkest, nastiest things that were left over from all the other therapy. I can't blame the counselors from before; they didn't know as much about the effects as they do now. WE (and others like us) are the ones who give them their insight."

As a counsellor I couldn't agree more with your final comments. If only all counsellors could be humble enough to recognise this and that clients never fit into neat little packages and if only all clients could be so forgiving when counsellors come up short :o(...

"That place that is most spiritual and which I spent the most time cleansing. I have been pushed so far in the last couple of years that there is nothing but darkness there."

I hope that you learn to find 'light' again when in this place Bohica.

"I am looking to expand my support system to include those who understand that dark place and the work it takes to enlighten it. And as favorite book says, "we teach best what we need most to learn." I have learned many things along the way that although at the moment, they seem to have been temporarily been lost to me, someone here may spark something in me that I may find helpful. We need others."

Only my experience, but the greatest healing comes from the close relationships forged with others, experiencing acceptance, none judgement, warmth and respect ( I consider this to be a form of love), I think you will find this here, I hope so for you. I loved the quote you used above, would you mind letting me know which book that comes from please. I intend to make a powerpoint page of it and hang it on the wall in my study, to remind me that I will always have much to learn (a good reminder to others who visit too).

Welcome again

Brian

[Donna]

Welcome to AS.

[Lene]

welcome to AS

[AmyLyn]

Welcome to AS

[bohica]

I loved the quote you used above, would you mind letting me know which book that comes from please. I intend to make a powerpoint page of it and hang it on the wall in my study, to remind me that I will always have much to learn (a good reminder to others who visit too).

The book is "Illusions" by Richard Bach. I realized today that when I was first introduced to that book so many years ago, I had first started talking about the abuse. It's a book that contains all sorts of short little sayings just like that. It's a book about making your life what you want it to be. I highly recommend it to anyone. I used to give away copies all the time.

Bohica

[dodo]

'Illusions' is also my favourite book - and I have given lots of copies away too! Gettinghard to find it these days. Richard Bach is deffinately worth reading. Another of his books 'Jonathan Livingston Seagull' is also briliant and about doing what you want to do with your life - not a childrens book despite the title. The soundtrack by Neil Diamond is also worth listening to but the film ... not so sure about.

Welcome again Bohica - there you go we already have something in common!

karen

[bohica]

'Illusions' is also my favourite book - and I have given lots of copies away too! Gettinghard to find it these days. Richard Bach is deffinately worth reading. Another of his books 'Jonathan Livingston Seagull' is also briliant and about doing what you want to do with your life - not a childrens book despite the title. The soundtrack by Neil Diamond is also worth listening to but the film ... not so sure about.

Welcome again Bohica - there you go we already have something in common!

karen

That book has always been somewhat of a touchstone. It was the first part of a lifelong spritual journey. It has taken me from Christianity to Buddhism to Native American/earth sprituality. All these philosophies have helped to form the basis for how I live my life. I've learned forgiveness and compassion. I've learned what it means to treat others as I would like to be treated. I've learned how to think things into being. I'm watching that now in how the things in my life surrounding my abuse are coming together. I've learned how truly powerful we all are.

Remember that your thoughts are only the beginning. Don't be surprised if something you thought would happen five years ago don't really happen tomorrow. It's all the more reason to think good things for yourself and others.

Healing together,

bohica

[Becky]

Welcome to AS

[Sparks]

Welcome

Sparks