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Hello, newbie here and learning

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Hello everyone... this seems to be a very helpful site and I am so glad I found you... I have been struggling with recovery for almost 50 years and it never seems to get easier but at least I am brave enough to reach out now... Hope to be here often..


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7 hours ago, Pushed over said:

Hello everyone... this seems to be a very helpful site and I am so glad I found you... I have been struggling with recovery for almost 50 years and it never seems to get easier but at least I am brave enough to reach out now... Hope to be here often..


Hello and welcome here! I am Wanna :flowers:

Yes, this site is very helpful being a community. You can share what you'd like to and connect to fellow survivors. You decide how often you'll sign in and in what ways you'll participate. Take your time to get to know this site. I and the other staff are happy to help if you'd have any questions or need some chatting/venting. After Silence invites all survivors to join our support system, wherever you may be at in your own journey. :notalone:

Please check your inbox for some information to get you started. 

Wishing you a good weekend

- W ☀️


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@Pushed over I am sorry for the trauma you endured that brought you here, but I am glad that you found us.  It takes a lot of courage to reach out, but I truly think that it is one of the first steps of healing to do so.  

:notalone:  :aswelcomesu:

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Welcome @Pushed over I'm glad you found us too! It really is an incredible community with so much support and understanding. It does seem these struggles are life long for most but I hope joining us here will help make yours a little easier. I commend your courage in reaching out. You are not alone 💛

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Hello Pushed over and welcome.

I am very sorry for the reasons that bring you here, but glad you decided to reach out. What happened to you was unfair and undeserved. This is a very supportive community with many understanding and kind people. You are not alone. 

We are all in different stages (and years) of healing, and tho healing itself can be a struggle, I think there are always steps forward we can make, it be a days or decades since the trauma. Finding others who know the affects can be very beneficial. 

Feel free to look around and interact where you feel comfortable. Wishing you the best on your continued path of healing.



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Welcome to AS. ❤️ I'm glad you found your way here. I'm sorry for what you've experienced; it was undeserved and unfair. But you are now in a safe place to work on healing. You're not alone...you'll meet lots of very friendly and supportive people here. Sending you all the best!


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Thank you all for responding and making me feel welcome.. I am so grateful for an opportunity to talk without judgements and conclusions.. I have individual therapy beneficial but also lacking.. Reading about the experiences of others makes me feel a kinship of sorts.. and kind of makes me feel a little less damaged...I hope to continue to build relationships and some strong bonds with others here that I can share my struggles and experiences with as well as provide a shoulder to others.. and ultimately break my cycle  of submissive behaviors.. Thanks so much..Dave who has been repeated "pushed over" by others..

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Hi Pushed over , the trauma you endured is saddening, I am glad you have found AS ,like you I have been trying to come to terms with the abuse .for over 50 yrs .everyone here are very supportive and understanding. 

             Regards UK63 .

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UK63, thank you... so far everyone has been supportive and I am amazed at the things others have experienced. It is sad that society preys on the innocent and vulnerable but I feel better having a place to verbalize (so to speak) some of the things I seldom get to talk about.. and I certainly feel less alone.. I have so many things to work on and to learn about.. and things I want to attempt to change and finally forget about forever.. if that is even possible... I hope you find your happy place as you work through your experiences and share how you do it for those of us still taking it one step at a time.. 

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Hi Pushed over , as you said one small step at a time, my psychologist used that term ,and I believe that to be true. Be kind to yourself. 

    Regards uk63 

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Ho BBB, I am new here and reading about the struggles of others and finding some comfort that I am not as alone as I thought. I hope you too can find some peace and comfort sharing with the rest of us.

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Blacksun, Thank you for the welcome.. I am reading and discovering that I share a lot of common issues with others.. I struggle with it daily. It was my dark secret for over 50 years and only in the few years have I been able to open up and discuss. Start group therapy next month and continued individual therapy.. I am finding this forum to be good for me for all the in between therapy time.. a long month... My journey started with some small penis humiliation by my mother and grandmother as they pondered why mine was so small.. They discussed it with most other female relate yes and neighbors and insisted I show it so they could all discuss what could possible be wrong.. I am certain that some of my predators were told about my mother's concern with my small size, round girly butt and hips and extremely small penis by their wives.. throw in some blonde hair, naive and submissive/obedient behaviors and I was a predators dream find.. At first when an older boy showed me something cool... masturbating him.. It was exciting but things quickly escalated at a fast pace and I found myself being the "girlfriend"..At 11, I did not have the courage to say anything and continued to endure the situation in silence and shame.. the teasing and humiliation of my body's reactions added to my shame and confusion.. and I soon became a source of fun for many other bigger, stronger, horny males.. It has continued throughout my life even into adult life after marriage.. Some of the things I have read here align with my therapist's recommendations on discussing it and sharing to aid in recovering.. I have had three therapists, two female and one male. I found I can open up more openly with females.. so I thank you again.. I have so many things to say after so many years, so many incidents.. I think I could fill a book.. 

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